


Always

by DestielHardcoreLove, Swlfangirl



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Benny Lafitte & Dean Winchester Friendship, Dancer Castiel, Dancer Samandriel, Domestic Violence, F/M, M/M, Past Rape/Non-con, Smut, Stripper Castiel, Threats of Rape/Non-Con, Violence, undercover cop Benny
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-20
Updated: 2016-08-20
Packaged: 2018-08-09 20:56:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 16
Words: 52,118
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7816924
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DestielHardcoreLove/pseuds/DestielHardcoreLove, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Swlfangirl/pseuds/Swlfangirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Undercover cop Benny thought he had himself under check, that he was getting somewhere with the infamous Angelo family, one of the biggest crime families in Boston.  All he needed was some more time to bring them all down in revenge for his friends.  Then he was given one of the biggest life changing assignments.</p><p>A parcel named "Alfie".</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Benny rubbed his sweaty palms down the sides of his jeans as inconspicuously as he could.  Why did he ever agree to this?  Ah yes, because it was his case and the Captain refused to allow anyone else on it.  He was the closest to it and knew the Angelo family better than anyone.  He’d spent years studying the big players and now he was finally able to get up close and personal with them.  

 

It had taken weeks for the lower family members to even spot him but he rose quickly among the ranks, earning their trusts and their favors.  Today had been a test, an errand given to him by the big Kahuna himself, Cain Angelo.  He had been given the task to get a specific briefcase to one of his “clients” during a very small window time.  It had started easy enough but then the distractions and speed bumps happened, yet Benny managed to complete it and still have time left over.

 

One of the big double doors to the office opened and a very pretty woman whom he knew only by photographs to be Amara Angelo, Cain’s wife.  She controlled all of Cain’s appointments and nothing happened without her knowing.  If you got in good with Amara, you were family to Cain.

 

“Hello there, Benny. Please, do come in,” she said, sweeping her arm out to beckon him toward the room.  Benny swallowed hard and hustled into the spacious office.  It was so open and beautiful it was hard to believe it belonged to one of the most dangerous families in Boston.  Cain sat lounged back in his office chair, his eyes tracking every move his wife made as she found her way back to him.  They were absolutely beautiful together and Benny had to mentally slap himself, he couldn’t get that close to them.  To start seeing them anything other than murderers and thieves.

 

“You’ve done exceptionally well my boy.  I had my doubts about you but you seemed to have greatly impressed even my wife,”  Cain said, giving his Amara’s wrist a kiss before rising up to his feet.  If any man could excel at being incredibly intimidating, yet graceful all in one swoop it would be Cain.

 

“Thank you sir,” Benny said with his most charming smile.  The corner of Amara’s lips twitched and Benny counted that as a win.

 

“I have something even more important for you.  It’s very, very precious to Amara and I and it’s very important that it arrives here safely.  You accomplish this, then you will have a job within this family for life, you up to it?” Cain asked with a smirk that sent chills up Benny’s spine.

 

“Y-yes sir…”

 

“Very good, Amara will give you the details,” Cain said patting him firmly on the shoulder before walking back toward his desk.  Benny took in a deep breath and counted to ten….he could do this.


	2. Chapter 2

Benny arrived at the airport in a car given to him by one of the Angelo cousins, Bart.  He tried to feel bad but he really couldn't stop the smug grin he got when he took the keys from that smarmy asshole.  The jealousy was practically pouring off the guy and Benny felt his chest swell with pride.  Now he was here, just waiting for the package to arrive.  

 

The jet was running a few minutes late but when it finally landed it wasn’t what he was expecting at all.  It was a luxurious jet, not one to just carry parcels it.  Frowning a bit he went over the details again when the door finally opened and revealed one of the most beautiful boys he had ever seen.

 

_ He was so fucked. _

 

Samandriel stepped off the plane tentatively. He hadn’t been sure about coming to Boston, but even living within a major crime family had to be better than where he’d came from. The first thing he laid eyes on was a burly man who looked somewhat constipated. It almost made Samandriel laugh but he cut himself off quickly because he doubted his uncle would take kindly to him disrespecting the wall of emotionless muscle he assumed was waiting for him. Samandriel looked down, a reflex to feeling his pulse spike and a nervous flutter growing in his stomach. There was something about the man that had his palms sweating and a heat crawling up his neck. 

 

_ Crap. _

 

Benny chewed on his lip as the kid got closer, he couldn’t be older than nineteen.  He was hunched into himself and trying so hard to make himself seem smaller but Benny could easily tell there was much more hiding under his clothes then he was letting on.  

 

He glanced down at his phone and mentally face palmed, Amara had told him the parcel was called “ALFIE”  and it never dawned on him that it was an actual person.  As soon as he was close enough Benny cleared his throat.

 

“Alfie?” he asked.

 

‘Well actually it’s Saman-, nevermind, I suppose that’s good enough.” He didn’t want to engage in any more conversation than necessary. He couldn’t form attachments here, and even if he could the last person he should want to befriend is some thug. Even if that thug happens to have amazingly bright blue eyes and a softer voice than he’d imagined. Shaking his head to himself, Samandriel moved toward the town car, pulling his luggage behind him no matter how much of a fuss the man put up. He wasn’t letting go of his things, what was left of his life was in that bag. 

 

“Here let me hel- okay then,” Benny humphed watching Alfie toss his heavy suitcase and duffel bags into the car.  Definitely reassuring him that the guy was hiding more muscle under those damn clothes.  Before the kid could disappear into the car Benny held fast onto the door and tried giving him a warmer smile, his face softening from the hard facade he was forcing on himself.

 

“I’m Benny Cormier,” he said, the faux last name sliding off his tongue easily.

 

The smile caught him off guard. He’d visited his uncle more times than he’d like to admit and not once had any of the underlings-slash-bodyguards actually smiled at him. Not a real smile, warm and stretched high enough to reach the eyes. There was something different about this man and the flutters in Samandriel’s gut only seemed to speed up. Trying not to let the man-no, Benny  realize how much he’d affected him in such a short time, Samandriel nodded stiffly and climbed into the back seat that had been opened for him. 

 

He bit his lip and said a polite, “Thank you.”

 

Benny nodded and pushed the door closed.  He’d get that kid to smile, it was now his personal goal to see how many times he could get him to.  He stopped short just at the trunk of the car.  Where had that even come from?  No, Benny, no.  You’re going to finish the task and hopefully never see this kid again.  He couldn’t let anything or anyone get in the middle, they’d end up getting destroyed when it was all over.  He shook himself and felt the cold character slide back into place just as he slipped behind the wheel.  

 

Without another word or glance, he drove quickly back to the mansion.

 

They rode in silence, which actually allowed Samandriel to relax.  _ This _ was normal.  _ This _ was what he was used to. Not big smiles and friendly introductions, but cold demeanor and familiar silence. He sat back in his seat, trying his best not to fidget. He honestly didn’t know what was awaiting him. His Aunt Amara had always been good to him, kind even, but Cain wasn’t the kind of person who tolerated  _ useless _ people and Samandriel wasn’t of any value to him. He couldn’t work in the business, far too shy and skittish around new people, not to mention that he actually didn’t want to. That fact alone might have enhanced his  _ already-there  _ anxiety. 

 

When they arrived at the  _ palace _ he nicknamed it in his head, he was eager to get out of the car. If nothing else Aunt Amara would see to it that he had his own quarters and once there, he could finally get ahold of himself. Not long after they came to a stop his door was opened for him and Samandriel climbed out. He reached for his bags, this time dismissed by the large man who was already packing them over his shoulder. 

 

_ Fair enough, _ for all he knew it could be something that stood between Benny and  unemployment if his uncle happened to take notice. As long as he kept within view, Samandriel would be fine. At least that’s what he told himself.

 

“Gotta check in with the Lady Angelo before anything else,” Benny said, guiding the kid into the house.  Alfie seemed to pretty much know where he was going but instead of going up the stairs, Benny gently touched his elbow to change his path.  One of the goons at the door knocked steadily and within seconds, they were pulled open and once again he was face to face with Amara.  

 

“Samandriel!  You’re finally here,” Amara said and for the first time since..ever, Benny was shocked at how soft the woman’s face became as she embraced the boy.

 

Samandriel smiled as he felt her thin arms wrap around his neck. He dove into her warmth and breathed in the sweet lavender scent of her shampoo. 

 

“Hello, Aunt Amara,” Samandriel responded, snuggling deeper into her arms. She wasn’t perfect and Samandriel knew that if push came to shove she would always back her husband, but she cared for him and it was as close to a mother’s love as he’d ever remember getting.

 

“I missed you,” he said, actually surprising himself at just how true it was. Samandriel wasn’t happy about the circumstances that brought him here or what would be expected of him, he was sure of it. But no matter the cost, she would always be someone he looked forward to seeing. 

 

Benny’s eyes wanted to bulge out of his head.   _ Aunt?! _ Oh god he did not expect that.  He stood there a bit awkwardly as the two continued to hug each other before Amara gently pulled away but kept her hands cupping the boy’s face.  Something like regret passed over her face and she sighed.

 

“C’mon, you’re uncle wants to speak with you before you unpack.  Benny, we’ll need you later but you may go for now,” she said with a wave of her hand.  

 

Benny caught the boy’s eyes, wide and a little scared and he almost,  _ almost _ asked if he could stay.  He had no idea what it would even accomplish, but he still considered it.  He gave a subtle nod and moved the bags closer to the door.  His phone was already buzzing in his pocket, letting him know that he needed to check in soon.

 

Amara watched their newest little soldier leave the house then gently pushed Samandriel into the office.  Having her nephew close was comforting and she wished she could keep him safe but she couldn’t risk angering her husband.  Samandriel had all of her brother’s gentleness and none of his mother’s hard headed tendencies.  Saddly, Samandriel had never met his real mother, only the slightly demonic Lilith who for some odd reason, Chuck had married.  Part of her knew it had something to do with Cain wanting her family within close range but she tried to shrug that off any time it came to her mind.

 

Before they could reach the desk, Amara stopped Samandriel and gave him another warm hug.  Both of them had lost someone important. Lately it was hard for her to even get up in the morning.  Chuck had been all the light in her world and now it was like she was being suffocated by darkness and couldn’t see a way out.

 

“Ah, there he is!” Cain called out, interrupting their embrace.

 

Samandriel felt himself stiffen at the sound of his uncle’s voice. It wasn’t like the man had ever hurt him, not like Lilith at least. That woman had a sick and twisted way of entertaining herself and most of the time Samandriel was her favorite toy. What his father had ever seen in her, or perhaps how he’d not seen through her, Samandriel will never understand. The woman had been viciously rude to him even when his dad was alive, but now...now she’d turned completely psychotic and no matter what was laid out before him, Samandriel was sure that it had to be better, it just had to be. 

 

“Hello, Uncle. Thank you for inviting me, once again.” Samandriel answered, moving forward to kiss at the rough skin over Cain’s knuckles just as he’d done his entire life. 

 

Amara watched as her husband smiled proudly down at Samandriel and felt something ease in her chest.  She had been worried from the moment Cain had requested Samandriel come stay with them. He never mentioned for how long and that was when the knot of worry had started to grow.  

 

“Good, good.  How was your flight?” Cain asked, gesturing for the chair across from his desk as he took his own seat.  Amara moved slowly to stand by his side, her hands folding together in front of her.

 

“It went well,” Samandriel paused, hesitating all the sudden. He bit back the urge to run, instead realizing it would be best to get whatever this was, over with. “This was an unexpected invitation Uncle, but I want you to know that I truly appreciate it.”

 

“Of course, you’re always welcome here with us in Boston.  Amara gets so lonely and I know how much she enjoys when you’re here,” Cain said.  Amara smiled over at her nephew but tensed when she noticed Cain getting up from his chair again.  He leaned up against the front of his desk and cleared his throat.

 

“But, I have to be honest with you Samandriel, there is another reason why I told your stepmother I needed you here, indefinitely.”

 

Samandriel’s heart dropped into his stomach and he swallowed hard around the lump in his throat. Almost instantly that phrase turned the blood in his veins to ice and he felt frozen, nearly paralyzed with fear. Any deal that Cain had made with Lilith wouldn’t be good for him, he knew it deep down to his core. “W-what is it?” 

 

“Well my boy, we just opened our newest venture and we need someone with real talent to draw in customers…”

 

“Cain you can not be serious,” Amara interrupted but instantly regretted it.  Cain flashed her a dark look and she bowed her head.

 

“As I was saying, you have an amazing talent nephew.  I’ve seen your videos and was blown away with how graceful you are.  If you dance at our club Bloodlust, I will pay for any college expenses you may have in the next five years,” Cain said.

 

Samandriel dug his blunt nails into his palms to keep himself from turning completely pale and getting sick. The last thing he wanted was to offend his uncle, he knew as well as the other two in the room with him that it wasn't  _ really _ optional. 

 

“That’s a very generous offer uncle. I-” Samandriel bit back his next comment at the last second. He knew it was pointless. Just because his father had opened a trust for him, Lilith was undoubtedly in charge of it for at least a few more years and by then it would probably be depleted. 

 

There was a harsh sting around the edge of his eyes but he held on, refusing to acknowledge what it was. Instead, he offered Cain a small fake smile, “I look forward to working for you.”

 

“Cain, may I speak with you alone?” Amara demanded, not able to take her eyes off Samandriel’s face.  He was so pale and nervous, it was churning her stomach.  Cain didn’t answer her, just turned his head to stare at her with a slightly cold look.

 

“I can’t agree with this, as you said he’s an amazing dancer he should not be dancing as some tramp in one of your clubs!” Amara said, her voice rising a bit.  She barely drew in a breath when Cain’s hand flew out, backhanding her across the cheek.  

 

“And I didn’t ask for your opinion, dear,” he said coldly.

 

Samandriel winced as if he'd felt the strike against his own cheek. A new level of hatred toward his uncle awakened inside him. He fought down the urge to rush and protect Amara knowing it wouldn't end well for either of them. Instead he did his best to smile for real and comfort his beautiful aunt. “I don't mind, really. It's a very generous offer. An education is expensive and I don't mind earning it. Especially if it would help out the family.”

 

Amara took in a deep breath and kept her emotions under control, her hand rising to wipe the very thin trail of blood from her bottom lip.  Cain rarely hit her but when he did, she had to force herself to remember who she was underneath all of this and nothing he could ever do would take that away from her.  She nodded at her nephew and straightened up.

 

“Good!  Now that, that is settled and you’re on board go enjoy yourself my boy.  The weather is warm and the pool is glorious.  Settle in and this Sunday, we’ll speak of all the details.  For now, your Aunt and I need to drive to Salem for a gathering,” Cain pushed away from his desk and clapped Samandriel on the side of his neck before reaching out for Amara.  She stared at him for a moment and then finally nodded.  She took his hand and followed him out of the office without another glance toward her nephew.

 

Samandriel stayed quiet but followed them from the room. With Cain facing away from him, he finally let his emotions show only to have to cover them up again when he spotted Benny in the hall. At least his bags were safe.

 

Benny straightened up immediately when he heard the door open. He hadn't been able to hear what exactly gone on in there but from the quick completely devastated look that was quickly erased from Samandriel's face, it wasn't good.  Amara was sporting a new split lip that actually wasn't too uncommon.  

 

“Benny! I have a very special job for you son.  You are to be available for whatever Samandriel may need.  He'll be starting work at  _ Bloodlust  _ so this week he is to indulge himself.  Think you can handle it?” Cain asked with a dark smile.  It was one that screamed try and defy me. 

 

Benny quickly nodded but couldn't help going a bit pale.  This beautiful innocent boy was going to work one of Cain's clubs?  It made his stomach twist thinking of the skeevy old men that would try and touch his body.

 

“Of course, I'll make sure he has my number before I take the car to get detailed,” Benny answered quickly. 

 

“Good boy, we’ll be leaving for a few hours,” Cain announced then led Amara toward the private wing of the house.  An area that no one was allowed into, though Benny was trying his hardest to figure out how.

 

Samandriel waited until his uncle was actually out of sight before grabbing up his bags and heading toward the room where he usually stayed. It wasn't one of the largest rooms but it had an ensuite bath and gorgeous bench seat beside the window that faced the back gardens.

 

It was hard to hold everything in, but breaking down in front of Benny wasn't optional. The last thing he needed was some henchman running to tattle on the new piece who wasn't behaving as expected. He ignored Benny’s persistent offers to carry his things and just moved at a steady pace down the east wing until he found the room he was looking for. 

 

Once there, he barreled in and although he knew it was rude, he didn't care. Samandriel slammed the door sharply behind him and finally allowed himself to feel the heavy weight of what this new information meant for him.

 

Samandriel slid down the solid wooden door and curled in on himself. His life was supposed to be better here, he was sure that things couldn't possibly be worse than living with Lilith. Now though, he wasn't so convinced.


	3. Chapter 3

Benny glanced down at his watch for probably the hundredth time and sighed heavily.  It was nearing on almost twenty-four hours since Samandriel had disappeared into his room and hadn’t come out for anything yet.  The cooks left him plates at his door and it seemed he had picked at them but that was it.  And if he hadn’t just ran into Cain, Benny would just let the kid be.

 

_ “So how is my nephew doing?” Cain asked, his voice causing Benny to jump a bit.  He wasn’t expecting the man to be up so early.  But yet here he was, looking as if he stepped right out of a freaking GQ magazine. _

 

_ “I haven’t seen him yet sir,” Benny answered.  Cain frowned deep, fingers beginning to twirl the bright silver band on his finger.   _

 

_ “Well, see to it that he leaves his room today Benny.  I won’t have him sulking the entire week,” Cain ordered, the underlying threat heavy in his words.  Benny swallowed hard and nodded, watching as Cain disappeared around the corner. _

 

So now he was standing outside of the poor kid’s room who more than likely just wanted to be left alone.  But if Benny could protect him in just the slightest of ways he was going to try.

 

He knocked against the door again and again, no answer.

 

“Samandriel...it’s Benny.  Can you open the door please?” he called out gently.

 

Under his delightful pile of blankets, Samandriel had no intentions of moving. He would hide there until the last possible moment and then he’d be carted off to what was likely some sort of strip club and shake his ass for anyone who’d watch. It wasn’t about grace or skill, he knew his uncle just needed some fresh meat and the pool of virgin twink strippers in Boston had to be fairly low. 

 

He snuffled under the nest of pillows and soft comforters even further, trying to tune out the sweet tune of Benny’s southern drawl. 

 

Benny leaned up against the wall next to the door and took in a long breath, “C’mon cher open the door please?” he called out, glaring at one of the many lackies roaming the house.  He wasn’t supposed to be in this wing and Benny nearly called him out on it but he stayed put, needing to hear Samandriel’s voice.

 

There was an almost desperation in his voice and no matter how pitiful Samandriel was feeling, he couldn’t just ignore that. Instead he wrapped the fluffiest, softest blanket over his shoulders and pulled two pillows against his chest before padding over to the door where he slid down and made himself a new home there. He didn’t want to see anyone but it was clear that Benny needed some proof of life or something equally ridiculous. 

 

“I’m comfortable in here, just ...can’t I just be left alone?” he asked, knowing the answer wasn’t going to be one he liked. Cain told him he had a week to spend how he chose but Samandriel knew that was still code for, you can do anything you want as long as I approve of it. 

 

Benny smiled when he finally heard his voice, “I wish it were that simple.  We can do whatever you want, even if it is to drive or stay out at the beach all day.  But…” Benny sighed and knelt down, he had a feeling Samandriel was sitting on the floor and he wanted to make sure he was heard.

 

“I gotta get you out of the house cher,” Benny whispered.

 

Samandriel groaned. He’d known it was coming. If he didn’t leave his room not only would that make things more difficult for him but it was likely that Benny would take the brunt of Cain’s wrath and as much as Samandriel told himself he didn’t care, he couldn’t sit idly by and let someone else take his punishment. Certainly not Benny who’d only shown him kindness, even going as far to actually smile at him. No, he knew what he needed to do.

 

“Very well, I’ll be ready to leave in half an hour.” 

 

“Okay, I’ll be waiting downstairs,” Benny called out.  There was some rustling from the other side and he couldn't help smiling when he realized he’d been right about Samandriel sitting at the door.  He hesitated for a short minute before turning on his heel to wait for Samandriel at the foot of the stairs.

 

Unfortunately the nest he’d built for himself had to be abandoned. Samandriel grabbed up a fresh outfit from his bag, still not unpacked beside the nightstand and headed toward the bathroom. He’d had another shower earlier and hadn’t moved much so he didn’t think he truly needed another but something felt itchy under his skin and if nothing else it was a small but manageable distraction. 

 

Soon he was dressed and ready to go, taking one last look in the mirror to make sure there were no obvious signs of his regular fits of sobbing and punching hard against the pillows and soft mattress of his bed. He’d briefly entertained taking his anger out elsewhere but he knew better than anyone not to “mark up the merchandise.” His uncle wouldn’t have been happy to have him bruised and bloody and if he knew Cain, he’d find some way to hurt him that didn’t leave a physical reminder. 

 

When he got to the bottom of the stairs Samandriel tucked his arms into his hoodie and folded them across his stomach. He didn’t speak just nodded toward the door and assumed Benny would follow. 

 

Benny wanted to scoop this kid up and just run. Whatever Cain was going to force him to do...no, Benny, keep your head in the game here. Can’t lose it over one sulking kid.  And once this all blows over, Samandriel will be free from all of this. That, at least, Benny could keep to.

 

Swallowing at his rising pulse he gestured toward the older car, not the one he had picked Samandriel up in at the airport.  It was his own personal car that Cain had approved of him using.  It was also the one that was tracked by the FBI and had passed Cain’s inspections.

 

“I can either drive you around like some cabby or you can ride up front with me, your choice,” Benny said with a little smirk.

 

Samandriel was surprised to see something other than a black, tinted windowed, town car or SUV waiting for him. It was Cain’s preferred choice that none of the family ride in anything that had personality, anything that could make them recognizable and therefore vulnerable. This though, this was a gorgeous car. He didn’t know much about them but the deep blue curves and shiny chrome had his heart skipping a beat. This looked like a car someone would take on a date, or maybe parking. Not that Samandriel had that much experience with either, still it was so raw and masculine, yet beautiful that he found himself smiling on instinct. 

 

He rubbed a soft line over the hood and before he knew what was happening, words spilled from his mouth. “Is it yours? I know my uncle would never-”

 

His eyes widened when he realized he was speaking openly, fluidly to a man who could probably care less. He glanced up at Benny and then quickly apologized, “Sorry.”

 

Benny smiled a little and quickly glanced around to make sure they were actually alone, “Don’t be and yes this is mine.  Cain was real hesitant about letting me use her but he finally caved,” he said.  Samandriel’s eyes were near bugging out of his head and Benny could only chuckle as he opened the front passenger side door open.

 

“C’mon,” he prompted when the kid didn’t budge.

 

Samandriel slid into the padded leather seat and tried to keep from putting his hands everywhere. The interior was just as beautiful as the outside and he wanted to feel the patterns under his fingertips. He needed to pull back though, so Samandriel tucked his hands back away inside his hoodie and tried not to think about the future. That only seemed to make him curl in on himself at the best of times and sob relentlessly at the worst. It would only get him into trouble.

 

“So, where you wanna go?” Benny asked once he was seated behind the wheel.  He didn’t wait for an actual answer as he pulled out of the driveway and past the gates.  Samandriel visibly relaxed and Benny nodded to himself, glad he was doing this more for Samandriel than to please his damn “boss”.

 

“I don’t care, just… just somewhere quiet.” Samandriel said, silently pleading with the trembling of his voice to be kept away and not have to deal with any more people than necessary. His fingers fidgeted inside his sweatshirt as he stared out the window. 

 

It had been a while since he’d been to Boston and there was so much time between visits that it was hard to memorize the streets but there were a few familiar landscapes and a couple restaurants he recognized. Maybe he would allow Benny to take him to the bakery with the magnificent red velvet cheesecake cupcakes. Amara had taken him there his last two visits and he’d reveled in the time he got to spend with her alone. 

 

Shaking his head, Samandriel pulled himself out of his thoughts. Thinking of his aunt would only remind him of the impending horror that was about to be his life. So he moved onto somewhat safer thoughts, like how the city buildings were slowly getting further and further apart. He wouldn’t ask where Benny was taking him, but he could see that the request for solitude was becoming more and more likely. 

 

Cain had never once mentioned how far out he could take Samandriel, just do whatever the kid wanted and that was it.  So, he was taking him to one of his more personal spots.  A place where he himself would run to get away from his parents.  It was a good forty minutes out and he liked how how eager Samandriel became when he pulled onto a deserted access road.  He parked a few feet within the tree line before cutting the engine.

 

“We gotta walk the rest of the way,” he said, not waiting for Samandriel to respond before getting out of the car.  They stayed silent as Benny continued to lead the way to a pretty big but yet secluded lake that was surrounded by a tight cluster of trees.

 

“This work for ya?” Benny asked with a smile.

 

Samandriel couldn’t help but gasp at the gorgeous view laid out in front of them. The lake was sparkling with sunshine, the trees heavy and thick making it seem even more private. “I-I- Wow,” he said, just trying to take in everything. He almost wished for a camera, a scene that beautiful needed to be remembered. Deciding that any photo was better than none, Samandriel took out his phone and snapped a few pictures. “It’s gorgeous.”

 

Benny grinned a bit wider and nodded, “I used to escape to here all the time when I was younger,” he admitted with a slight flush growing up his neck.  

 

“Do you wanna be alone?  I can wait for ya in the car if you need…”

 

“No,” Samandriel almost surprised himself at how quick he was to answer. “No, it’s okay…”

 

He stared out at the scene a little longer, the itch under his skin returning with a vengeance. He knew nothing would truly get rid of it, but Samandriel was eager to try. “Is the water okay, I mean is it safe?”

 

“Sure, maybe some fish and frogs in there but other than that it should be fine.  Go on,” Benny prompted, wanting to reach out and playfully nudge Samandriel but he kept his hands to himself.  It wasn’t too hot but he knew he water would be nice from previous dips he’d taken out here.  In fact, it was too good to pass up himself.  He kicked off his shoes and socks and stepped closer to the water.  

 

Samandriel hesitated, not wanting to ride home in sopping wet clothes but also unsure about stripping down in front of Benny. He was sure it wouldn’t matter to the man either way but he still struggled with the choice. Steeling himself, he supposed he might as well get used to it. He’d be doing it for roomfuls of strange men in just a matter of a few days.

 

Without another thought, Samandriel pulled his hoodie over his head and quickly got to work with the rest of his clothes, stopping when just his boxers were left. He couldn’t go further than that, regardless of what was to come. He walked toward the lake’s edge and tentatively stepped out into the water. It wasn’t warm, not at first..but once he managed to get in past his thighs, the sun’s warmth surrounded him and he finally felt relaxed. 

 

“I can see why you come here, I-I wish I had a similar place. The closest thing I’ve found is the window seat in my room at the pala-mansion,” he said, offering Benny a small smile. It was nice of the man to share his secret place with him, but Samandriel wasn’t expecting to get the opportunity to come back.

 

“All ya gotta do is say the word cher, or just give me a look and I’ll bring ya.  Everyone’s gotta have a place to escape to,” Benny said, watching Samandriel get further out into the water.  Benny stayed on the shore, not wanting to crowd the poor kid or even scare him.

 

“I appreciate the offer Benny, but I don’t think I’ll have the opportunity for things like this after I start  _ working _ .” He tried not to sound bitter at the end, but knew he failed spectacularly. He took in a deep breath and slowly exhaled over a few beats, forcing himself to relax. “I’d understand if you want to keep your distance, but I don’t mind if you’d like to enjoy the lake as well. It’s a big space and the water is very warm.” 

 

“Just don’t wanna make you uncomfortable,” he said softly.  Benny finally caved in and started to strip down as well.  Thankfully he had put on his more “fashionable” briefs rather than his boxers.  He stepped out further into the water and took in a deep breath.  The water really was nice and felt amazing on his heated skin.

 

Samandriel made a few laps to the small alcove and back as Benny prepared to come into the lake. He didn’t want to be caught staring at the hard muscle and perfectly tanned skin, so he decided it was better to avoid the temptation entirely. Once Samandriel noticed that Benny was finally waist deep, he slowed down to float with the small current in the lake. 

 

“So what do you usually do when you come here? Other than the obvious, I mean. Do you bring friends, a picnic, your girlfriend?” Samandriel asked, wincing internally at how obvious he was being. Normally he wouldn’t say anything, that’s mostly the story of his life. Too afraid to talk to anyone, too terrified of rejection. Though there was something about Benny that had him speaking with an unfamiliar ease. 

 

Benny chuckled, “Exactly this but usually alone though. I never brought anyone here, well, until now anyway. Besides, there’s no girlfriend to bring anyway,” he said with a wink thrown in Samandriel’s way.

 

It was almost too easy to get caught up in Benny’s relaxed smiles and short wonderful laughs. The thing is though, Samandriel didn’t. Not really, at least. He enjoyed the time they spent together even though it wasn’t much yet, but couldn't help notice that  there was this weird vibe coming off Benny. It was almost pushing him away, no matter how friendly the gestures or words seemed to be. “I don’t know how, but you’re different. You aren’t like the other men who work for my uncle, you’re...something else.”

 

Benny shrugged, the nerves fluttering in his chest that maybe this kid was seeing right through him.  He wanted to allow the cool facade to slide back into place but he also didn’t want to be entirely fake with Samandriel.  Maybe eventually he could trust him and even get his help to take down Cain.  But that would be much, much later.  

 

“The other guys, they try too hard to impress the old man.  Hell anyone could bark out orders and think they’re a big shot but I don’t.  I know where my place is and if I get promoted in the end, then awesome,” Benny laughed, shrugging his shoulders again.

 

Samandriel didn’t really buy the story, not completely anyway. He could tell there was a fraction of truth in it, the  _ I-don’t-give-a-fuck _ vibe about Benny was strong when it came to Cain. There was something else to it though, but he couldn’t put his finger on what. He ignored the spike in his heart rate and instead focused on the water and the view around them. It was then that he had a brilliant idea. He was probably two feet in front of Benny when he dove forward shouting, “Race you to the other side!” 

 

“Hey!” Benny laughed, quickly shooting forward to start swimming.  He managed to catch up to Samandriel but the kid had some power to him.  Ended up beating him by an entire foot.

 

“You little shit, that was cheating!” Benny barked, pushing some water into Samandriel’s face.  It was dangerous to be this candid but Benny kept telling himself it was only to gain the boy’s trust.  And only that.

 

“Oh please, you just wish you’d thought of it first. Besides, I have a swimmer’s body, the odds were never in your favor.” Samandriel chuckled, rolling his eyes and doing a backstroke to put some distance between them. He took in the scenery around him and everything just looked so damn peaceful. For a split second he almost wished Benny hadn’t brought him here, hadn’t given him something to miss. 

 

“C’mon fair fight this time one lap around the whole lake, if you actually manage to beat me I’ll buy you dinner.”

 

“And what if I lose?” Benny asked with a smirk.  

 

Samandriel bit his lip a little, suddenly nervous over the admission that was coming up. He’d thought about it over the last few days but never really thought it was an option. Benny though, he seemed to make things possible and even though he wasn’t sure what the man would say to him, Samandriel responded. “You’ll take me for dinner...at a club.”

 

Benny stared at him for a few moments before finally remembering how to blink, “A club?  Why?”  Benny rubbed the back of his neck and cleared his throat, “Sorry,  I’ll take ya wherever you wanna go.”

 

Feeling something shift inside him Samandriel reached out, putting a hand on Benny’s arm. “Not-You don’t have to...I don’t want you taking me because my uncle said to do whatever I want. If it makes you uncomfortable we can go somewhere else.”

 

“Hey no, it’s not like that.  I just don’t know why you’d wanna go to a club?  Especially for food, usually they barely serve anything that isn’t deep fried.  But I meant what I said, regardless of what your uncle asked of me,” Benny explained, gently taking Samandriel’s hand in his own.  God he just wanted to pull Samandriel in and kiss that scared look off his face but he refrained, keeping the warm smile as he squeezed Samandriel’s fingers.

 

Fidgeting a little with his free hand, Samandriel fought back the rise of heat to his neck and cheeks. He couldn’t let a slight embarrassment distract him for too long. Benny would undoubtedly notice. “It’s not that I want to..necessarily. I just don’t think my uncle will be too happy if I have no idea what I’m supposed to do when I get up on stage next week. I don’t think doing a excerpt from Swan Lake is really going to work.”

 

Benny groaned, suddenly understanding, “No, I don’t think so either.  And the less your uncle is upset about that, the better.  Look, I know someone who might be able to help, wanna head out?” Benny asked chewing on his bottom lip.

  
“Not yet, I wanna stay like this..just a little longer.”


	4. Chapter 4

As soon as they walked in, the stale smell of sex hit him. He recognized the sweaty musk from the many times he woke up to find strangers stumbling down the stairs from his stepmother’s room. Samandriel’s nose curled up unintentionally under the scent of it and thankfully Benny was a warm steady presence at his side. He was glad to have an anchor in the sea of everything that was happening to him.

 

The lights were low in the seating area but the stage lights were bright enough that you could still see quite well inside the large space. Music pulsed against in his ear, a techno beat without lyrics or any real meaning. He supposed that was fitting. Benny’s warm hand on his lower back led him toward a table near the back area that didn’t have as good a view of the stage but was thankfully mostly empty. 

 

Benny was grateful that his friend finally stopped dancing at those nasty skeevy clubs at the edge of town.   _ Wings _ wasn’t top notch like Cain’s clubs were but it was still a huge upgrade.  He made sure to sit a bit close to Samandriel in case any stray asshole tried to move up to their table.  Benny really didn’t want to hit anyone tonight, he couldn’t risk getting thrown in jail.  He saw a flash of blonde hair out of the corner of his eye and quickly waved the manager over.

 

“Hello, Hello lovelies,” Balthazar said, his eyes instantly scanning Samandriel.  The guy was a total shark with an endless belt with not enough notch marks.  Benny let out a low subtle growl and Balthazar laughed.

 

“My apologies, usually Benny here comes in without a little date.  Thought you were a present for me,” Balthazar snarked.

 

Samandriel’s eyes narrowed in confusion. He didn’t really understand what was going on but it made him want to snuggle closer to Benny, so he did. He tried to remember to smile, to act friendly even though his stomach was clenched tight with nerves and quite a bit of panic. He didn’t want to be here, but not being here would leave him completely unprepared and he shivered at the thought of what his uncle might say if he wasn’t at least passably entertaining.

 

“Cas here tonight?” Benny asked, glaring at Balthazar with a hard look.  His arm wound around Samandriel’s shoulders a bit possessively and was grateful that he didn’t try to pull away.

 

“Oh of course he is darling, he’s my main event.  You want me to book him for you?” Baltazar asked pulling out the tablet that Benny hadn’t even see him carrying.

 

“Yes, two hours,” Benny said.  Balthazar typed something in and plucked at the credit card Benny offered over.  Thankfully it wasn’t his own money but Cain’s.  There was no way he could ever afford Castiel for two hours on his own salary.

 

“Alrighty, once he’s done his first routine you may go to his private room!  Have fun,” Balthazar said and trotted away.  Benny rolled his eyes and looked down to see Samandriel staring at him with very wide eyes.

 

Samandriel swallowed hard. The knowledge that Benny at least appeared to be a regular at this club, seemed to stick in his throat. If not for the somewhat slimy feeling he got from the blonde man he’d have put a little distance between them. The picture of who he’d thought Benny was started to fade. It wasn’t as if Samandriel thought the man was perfect but somehow the version he’d created wasn’t someone who spent copious amounts of time inside a strip club.

 

When he’d finally left, Samandriel inched away only a little. He didn’t want to give up the smell of pine and lake water that seemed to stick to Benny even more than it did on him. It was one of the only things keeping him from running out he door.

 

“Sorry about him, he’s a bit of a douchebag but he’s better than the last jackass Cas used to work for,” Benny said, trying to ignore how his chest lurched a bit when Samandriel tried to pull away from him.

 

“Cas is an old friend who got mixed up with the worst people.  I’ve been trying to help him out but if these dick bags were to find out he was accepting money from an outside source…” Benny took in a deep breath and looked around, “they’d hurt him more than they already have.  So I’m a regular ‘customer’ but all we do is talk,” Benny explained quietly, praying that none of these assholes could hear him.

 

Samandriel nodded, trying to understand. It was a little far fetched, but he actually trusted Benny so he accepted it as truth. Leaning closer so Benny could hear him, Samandriel spoke quietly against his ear, “So what about you?, he asked, pulling away to see the look of confusion on the man’s gorgeous features. Feeling braver, Samandriel felt a small smile tugging up his mouth as he edged back in. “Who is going to help you get away from the  _ worst _ people?”

 

Benny laughed a little and shrugged, “I’ll worry about that later.  I’ve got some plans though, don’t worry,” he said with a little wink.  

 

Benny had all but confirmed Samandriel’s suspicions. Most of the people who worked for his uncle,  _ wanted _ to. Sure, there were probably a few family members who did it because they were too scared to say no, and maybe even a couple who just grew up in the life and didn’t know anything else. Most of them though, most of them loved it. He could tell by the looks in some of their eyes that they’d enjoy hurting people.

 

But amongst the ridiculous amount of people his uncle employed, there was Benny. Benny who didn’t want this, didn’t want to be this, and Samandriel couldn’t help but fall in a little deeper. 

 

Benny opened his mouth to ask why Samandriel was looking at him like he hung the moon when the lights dimmed and the heavy base to Castiel’s signature song came through the speakers.  Tonight Castiel was in prime form, wearing black booty shorts and a very sheer blue top.  He could practically see the glow in Cas’s eyes from their table in the back.  Castiel was good at his job and loved to dance, Benny’s heart got stuck in his throat as he realized that soon this was going to be Samandriel’s fate.  

 

He shifted uncomfortably and it wasn’t that he was aroused, yeah Castiel was beautiful and incredibly sweet when he wanted to be, but he was a friend; someone Benny promised himself that he would keep safe when he could.  He’d already failed his best friend, who was actually Castiel’s fiance.  It was what started this whole thing in the first place and why Benny was so adamant in taking down the biggest crime family in Boston.

 

By the time Benny stopped spacing out and looked at the stage again, Castiel was down to a pair of electric blue panties that of course, had the men shouting out his stage name “Angel”.  Benny of course wasn’t even phased, if anything he felt sick to his stomach.  Thankfully it was over pretty quickly after that, he didn’t know how much more he could watch with Samandriel sitting next to him.  He couldn’t even make eye contact with the kid.

 

Samandriel swallowed hard, he wiggled a little uncomfortably in his seat. The boy on stage wasn’t wearing hardly anything by the end of it and Samandriel had only seen a few pornographic videos, too embarrassed to delve deeper. This was different though, this was a live human person and his body was moving fluidly in a way that Samandriel understood. It was difficult not to be aroused by it. He chanced a side glance in Benny’s direction but found his eyes averted as soon as he had. Before he could stop it the apology spilled from his mouth as he ducked his head a little ashamed of himself even though it wasn’t really something he had full control over, “Sorry.”

 

“You got nothin to be sorry for cher, promise,” Benny said.  The music had gone back to techno house music that instantly gave Benny a headache.  Castiel slinked off the stage and Benny gently took Samandriel’s hand to lead him toward the hallway.  There was a total of six private room and Castiel’s was in the back, the most luxurious of them all.  

 

He knocked against the door twice and soon he was being greeted by Castiel’s grim face.  It instantly melted into something softer and he ushered them in quickly.

 

“Heya Ca-oof,” Benny grunted as the guy launched himself into his arms, hugging him tightly.

 

“I’m so glad you’re here,” Castiel said softly, his hands becoming a bit clingy.  Benny cursed under his breath.  He really didn’t want to push Castiel away but the stupid cameras were still on them.

 

“Sh, sh, sh, hey it’s okay,” Benny said, rubbing Castiel’s back a few times before managing to push him away.  They shared a look and Castiel quickly nodded and went to work turning the cameras off.  It was only then he even realized they weren’t alone.

 

“Oh...hello,” Castiel said looking over at Samandriel.

 

Samandriel shyly waved, and then steeled himself to move forward. He would have to get used to speaking to people. His uncle wouldn’t excuse his shyness and neither should he. “Hello, Cas. That was an amazing performance out there.” 

 

Castiel let out a little laugh and caught Benny’s eyes before extending his hand, “Thank you,” he said, his tone questioning as he looked up at his friend again.

 

“Cas this is Samandriel, Cain’s nephew,” Benny said and just by how tight Castiel’s eyes became, he didn’t need to explain anything else.  Castiel damn near deflated and pulled his robe on even tighter.

 

“So...what’s this about then?” Castiel said, swallowing thickly as his hands folded together in front of him.

 

Samandriel instantly knew something had changed. The moment his uncle’s name was mentioned the air seemed to leave the room. He looked curiously up at Benny and then to the beautiful dancer in front of him when it all clicked. 

 

“Oh no, no I ‘m not- I mean I wouldn’t-” he fumbled, his panicked thoughts keeping him from making coherent sentences. 

 

“It’s okay, trust me, Castiel understands,” Benny said, gently squeezing Samandriel’s hand again.

 

Castiel nodded, his mouth turning down into a frown, “That I do, more than I even like to admit.  I can tell just by looking at you that you don’t want to be here. I also know Benny wouldn’t just bring anyone here to watch me dance.  He only watches my shows occasionally himself and that’s mostly to not draw suspicion.” 

 

“You’re a dancer aren’t you?” Castiel asked eyeing Samandriel carefully.  The younger boy definitely had the build for it even if his confidence had him cowed into himself. 

 

Samandriel tucked himself into Benny’s shoulder and took a deep breath. He hated feeling this way but he had to at least try. Pissing Cain Angelo off wasn’t a wise choice and as much as he’d tried to practice a few hip-hop moves in the privacy of his room, it didn’t exactly make him qualified to strip. Though telling his uncle that probably wouldn’t get him anywhere. 

 

Using the strength he drew from Benny’s presence, Samandriel finally turned back to face the room. “I’ve done ballet my whole life, but it’s not exactly… y’know, this.”

 

Castiel shook his head and dragged a hand over his face.  It was just what he thought and he needed a drink.  Without a word he went to his vanity and started to pour himself a shot of whiskey but just took a sip straight from the bottle.  The burn helped settle him a bit but it wasn’t until he slipped his engagement ring back on that he felt like Castiel Novak again and not the whore Angel.

 

He looked back over at Samandriel with a sad smile, “Contemporary.  All my life I trained and trained to get accepted into Juliard,” he laughed a bit and sat down on his bed.  “What do you want me from me Benny?” Castiel asked looking down at his ring.  There was a shuffle of feet and soon Benny was kneeling down at his feet.

 

“He needs help and you’re the only one I can trust,” Benny said softly.

 

There was a familiarity between the two that almost made Samandriel jealous. He knew it was ridiculous, Benny hadn’t seemed at all interested in the show, not to mention the fact that he really had no claim on the man. That didn’t stop the itching under his skin, though. 

 

Castiel nodded, fingers twirling the silver band before looking back up at Samandriel, “We can’t do it here, not after today.  Balthazar wouldn’t care but if the actual boss came in and saw me teaching you, he’d want to know why and I’ve been very careful keeping off his bad side,” Castiel said.  

 

Benny chewed on his lip and raised up to his feet.  There wasn’t too many places they could go without someone inevitably seeing them.  

 

“We could use Charlie’s basement?” Castiel offered.  Benny barked out a laugh and was nodding before he even thought clearly about it.  It was too perfect.  Their friend was a hacker and nothing could get past her “fortress” that was just the basement in her mother’s house.

 

“Sounds good,” Benny said, looking down at his watch, “We’ve got a little less than two hours now, did you want to start tonight?” Benny asked Samandriel.

 

Nodding shakily, Samandriel agreed. “I can’t afford to put it off any longer..”

 

Castiel nodded and went to turn up the speakers to his room up, “Benny you’re gonna have to be the ‘client’,” Castiel laughed, pointing over to one of his chairs.  Benny sighed, grabbing it and plunking it down in the middle of the room.

 

“Just...don’t make it a thing if I get a little worked up, it’s been awhile,” Benny said, his face going a dark shade of red as he sat down.

 

Castiel snorted as he patted Benny on the shoulder and then moved closer to the slightly trembling boy, “I want you to watch.  I know you’ve done nothing but Ballet but you have rhythm and you have timing.  All you need to learn is how to move your hips and make these stupid johns think they’re having sex with you.  It’s all fake and in the end, there are worse things your uncle could have forced you into.  When you start to think dark thoughts, keep that in mind okay?” Castiel said tipping up Samandriel’s face.

 

Samandriel was already overwhelmed, but he nodded eagerly. Cas was right, his uncle could have forced him into worse positions, he guessed. Though, that particular thought hadn’t crossed his mind before now. It left him unsure of whether or not he should be relieved. He gave Cas a small smile and focused on Benny to keep himself calm. “Okay, I can do that.”

 

Castiel nodded and turned down the lights a bit before letting the character of “Angel” take over, his body instantly melting into the song and moving his hips in smooth circles.  Slowly he turned his back on Benny and slid his robe off his shoulders, revealing the tight pair of panties he still had on from his routine.  He almost faltered a bit when he took a step forward, he forced himself to not think of the man before him as his friend, but just another john who wanted nothing but a release.

 

He threw his robe toward his couch and stepped up to Benny, his smile dark and devious.  He could already see the pulse in Benny’s throat and he yanked at his hair to drag his tongue up the line of his throat.

 

“Shit...n-not a word of this to anyone,” Benny gasped.  Castiel hummed his response and glanced over at Samandriel as he straddled Benny’s thighs. Their eyes locked just as he lowered his hips and rolled them down hard, getting a low moan out of Benny’s mouth.

 

Something tight and angry rose in Samandriel’s gut at the sight before him. The way Benny’s face looked tense but soft at the same time. The movement of Castiel’s hips over the thick, open thighs was enough to have him moving forward. “L-Let me try,” he said, barely speaking over the music. “I’m more of a hands-on learner.”

 

It was a lie and he was pretty sure neither of them bought it but if Samandriel had to watch someone else writhe on top of Benny for another second he was going to explode.

 

Castiel smirked, slowly rising up and turning to Samandriel, “We need to get you a bit more undressed then,” he said softly.  He grabbed up the boy’s hand and gently pulled Samandriel to stand in front of Benny with his back to Castiel’s chest.  Castiel gripped at his hips and started to guide him into moving with the song, “Just keep your eyes on Benny, let his desire for you fuel you,” he said against Samandriel’s ear.

 

Benny swallowed hard and couldn’t tear his eyes off Samandriel, he was so nervous and timid but beautiful.  He was already a little aroused from Castiel’s teasing but seeing Samandriel dancing in front of him had his heart hammering in his chest.  This was going to be embarrassing for him but Benny stowed it away, this was for Samandriel, he could suck it up.

 

It was natural for him, moving to the beat. The strange part was trying to be sexy, it wasn’t something he’d ever achieved on his own, nor something he’d ever thought he’d need to try. He guessed now there was a lot he’d have to do that hadn’t expected. Shaking himself internally Samandriel pulled himself back to the moment. Focusing on the bright blue of Benny’s eyes that had nearly disappeared. 

 

He pulled off his tee shirt, almost grateful for his courage at the lake. Seeing him mostly undressed wouldn’t be a new sight for Benny, though the there was something more tantalizing about it now. He tugged his jeans down slowly but he figured it wouldn’t be nearly as difficult to get out of whatever costumes he’d have to wear. For that at least, he was grateful. Samandriel was sure that there weren’t very many ways to  _ sexily _ take off a pair of tight jeans.

 

Castiel stopped him from getting his jeans all the way down and smiled, “Turn your back to him and keep your hips moving to the beat.  Then slowly push them down.  When they get to your ankles, kick them at his face.  Don’t bother trying to figure out why it’s hot, men love it,” Castiel said, taking a step away from Samandriel to watch him.

 

Samandriel chuckled and it made him extremely glad for the tutor Benny had chosen for him. He dipped his hands beneath the waistband and slowly started moving his hips in the same way as before. This time though, he backed up further.  He turned around long enough to slide a knee between Benny’s legs and get him to open up.  From there, he stood inside the vee of those strong muscular thighs. 

 

Once he was where he wanted to be, Samandriel spun back around to follow Cas’ instructions. He grabbed the thick denim top of his jeans and tugged as he dipped low, rising so that his ass popped up nicely, leaving him bent over dramatically in front of Benny’s crotch. He pulled his legs together and shook his hips, forcing the now loose fabric further down his legs. 

 

Once he got his jeans around his ankles he laughed and did what Cas had told him. He was pretty sure it ruined the illusion, but Samandriel knew when faced with anyone who wasn't Benny, he’d have no trouble keeping a straight face.

 

Benny grinned wide and caught the pants before they smacked him in the face.  He hated to agree with Castiel but usually, that move was pretty hot but Samandriel was too busy laughing.  Not that he was complaining of course, Benny was enjoying the hell out of Samandriel’s humor in this situation.

 

Castiel rolled his eyes fondly and gently pushed Samandriel forward, “Now you can tease him with little to no touching or dance close enough for him to feel the heat of your skin.  He can’t touch you but he’ll want too.  The more amped and crazy you drive them, the better the tips,” Castiel explained with a saucy wink.

 

“I keep up this teasing game until their fingers are usually clenched up on their legs,” Castiel grinned, grabbing at Samandriel’s hips and moving him to the beat again.  He could almost feel the moment it clicked and Samandriel became more fluid and relaxed into the music.  Silently he took a step back and just watched.

 

The music pumping into the room wasn't what he would have chosen for himself but the beat was steady and not so fast that he felt like he was going to get dizzy. Samandriel backed up to straddle one of Benny’s thighs. He didn't lower himself down any, following Cas’ advice. Instead he focused on getting so close that he could almost feel the scrape of denim between his own legs as he rolled his hips and dipped down to practically shove his ass into Benny’s face. 

 

He pulled away but not for long, Samandriel reached out to grab the wooden chair arms and used them to keep himself balanced as he dipped down to his knees nestling low in the open space of Benny’s spread thighs. The distance between them was almost nothing as Samandriel looked up at Benny with a wide smile and slowly licked his lips.

 

“Damn,” Benny groaned, his eyes completely trained on Samandriel in front of him.  He was barely aware of Castiel giving Samandriel critiques here and there.  A part of him wished the lighting was a bit better in the room but on the other hand, it would just remind him of exactly where they were and why Samandriel was even dancing for him in the first place.  Clearing his throat he straightened up a little but not once did he take his eyes off Samandriel.

 

Realizing that he wasn’t actually getting anywhere, well not as quickly as he’d like at least, Samandriel leaned into Benny’s space. He slowly crawled up the full length of Benny’s body barely touching the man as he climbed higher and higher until he swallowed the nervous lump in his throat and breathed in the scent of pine musk. His mouth was only inches from what he could bet was the soft, smooth skin of Benny’s neck. He took a slow deep inhale forcing his breath to skate against the sensitive skin before moving closer to Benny’s ear and letting out a slow, purposeful moan. “Mmmmm.”

 

Benny’s head dropped back as he fought to keep his breathing under control.  He caught Castiel staring at him with a little too devious a look and closed his eyes.  The warmth of Samandriel’s body was incredibly tempting and he had to dig his fingers into his legs to keep from reaching out and just pulling the kid right down on his lap.

 

When he saw how tightly Benny’s hands were clenched Samandriel grinned. It was actually working, he  _ could _ be sexy. Using that as his cue, he propelled himself forward and began to grind on Benny’s lap. His knee came at just the perfect height to rub against the thick outline. Samandriel could feel his own dick pulsing along with his heartbeat and he moaned at the contact he made with Benny’s thigh. It felt amazing and soon he began to roll his hips with intention. Needing friction. Something about the room melted away and Samandriel pushed himself closer to Benny’s ear. “I-Iahh, I’m glad it’s you… that you’re the one here with me.”

 

“Shit, me too cher, ungh God,” Benny grunted, everything becoming a haze except for the amazing blue of Samandriel’s eyes.  They were so blown out it gave Benny chills and he had to grit his teeth keep from getting too deep in the pleasure.

 

Castiel moved up and drew Samandriel back a bit from how he was curled up into Benny.  He understood that this was a bit more personal between the two of them but he had to get Samandriel back in control.

 

“I know it feels good and you wanna just keep rutting against him until you’re spilling inside your underwear but this isn’t about your pleasure.  It’s about his.  About how you can make him cum while you’ve still got a clear head.  Find the control Samandriel,” Castiel whispered into his ear.

 

Samandriel let out a low whine when Cas pulled him away, but he understood. Not only did he need to focus on the tutoring, but he doubted that Cas wanted to watch him rub off on Benny’s thigh and as much as he’d have liked to it would have been extremely embarrassing. Samandriel consoled himself with the knowledge that even If he couldn’t have anything else he would always have the memory of how wonderful Benny felt under him. How thick and powerful the man was, but also the heat Samandriel had felt when he’d shown so much restraint. Not once had Benny’s hands reached for him and as disappointing as it was, Samandriel knew that it was for the best. 

 

Castiel continued to watch and correct where he could but with each critique Samandriel took the information and blossomed with it.  The moment Castiel realized this kid could definitely be competition if he were to ever work in the same club made Castiel smirk.  Thank God, Cain would be impressed with this nephew and wouldn’t hurt him.  Hopefully.

 

“Okay, I think that’s enough for now, unless Benny here wants you to um, finish him off?” Castiel grinned.

 

Benny swallowed hard and really wanted to say yes but he also didn’t want Samandriel to think he was using him as some cheap way to get off.  He pried his fingers out of the sides of his jeans and cupped the sides of Samandriel’s face.

 

“N-No…” Benny peered into Samandriel’s eyes and tried to convey to him exactly why he was saying no without actually saying it out loud.  He was hard as a rock and so very close but he didn’t want it like this.  

 

Samandriel was both grateful and a little disappointed. It’s not as if he’d imagined losing any level of his virginity in a strip club but seeing Benny’s eyes dark with lust and feeling the hard outline beneath him had made everything and everyone fade away. He knew without a doubt that if Benny had said yes, Samandriel would have gladly done it, or tried to at least. 

 

This was better though, he told himself. No matter how many times he repeated it, the weighted lump still felt heavy in his gut. 

 

He turned to Cas, careful of his movements making sure not to accidentally get too close and he wrapped his arms around Cas’ shoulders. Samandriel bent his head to rest on the dancer’s warm skin. “Thank you, I-Just thank you, so much.”

 

Castiel tensed for a split second when Samandriel hugged him but melted into it, pulling the younger boy closer.  He wasn’t used to being touched without the edge of pain, unless Benny came to visit him but those times were very few.

  
“You’re welcome.  You’re going to be magnificent Samandriel, I promise.  Now c’mon, we still have an hour, let me teach you how to do your own make up,” Castiel said, pulling him toward the vanity.


	5. Chapter 5

Samandriel thought of suggesting another, more private  _ practice  _ session later, but he thought better of it. Benny wasn’t shy and if the man wanted him, Samandriel figured he’d say something sooner or later. Instead he sat silently as they headed back toward the palace. Thinking back over the interaction he’d had with Cas and trying to memorize his advice. Something struck him odd though, he remembered this moment where he was getting too overheated and Cas’ left hand wrapped around his wrist to help him stay in control. It was a simple touch but there was something hard and metal that collided with his skin and Samandriel’s eyes were drawn to it. A thick silver band sat on his ring finger filling Samandriel’s mind with a ton of scenarios. 

 

“Is- I mean, I know it’s probably not my business but is Cas married?”

 

The question was harmless enough but a steel rod of pain shot right through Benny’s chest.  Castiel’s whole situation was a severely fucked up one and partly Benny’s fault.  It didn’t matter how many times Cas tried to tell him it wasn’t, Benny still felt guilty.

 

“No, he um, he was-is engaged,” Benny said softly, his eyes already tight.  The knot that always formed in his throat when he thought of Dean made it hard to breathe and he gripped the steering wheel until his knuckles turned white.

 

It didn’t take a genius to figure out that whatever he’d accidentally brought up wasn’t a happy topic for Benny so Samandriel didn’t ask any more questions. He was curious to an almost painful point but everyone has a past and he wouldn’t want anyone poking into his either. Instead he inched over toward the middle of the seat and slid his hand over Benny’s knee. He squeezed it and did his best to give a soft but kind smile before changing the subject.

 

“So how long has it been since you’ve driven up to the lake? Not counting today, obviously.”

 

Benny let out a stuttered breath, relieved that Samandriel didn’t ask anymore questions.  He wanted to tell him but it wasn’t a pretty story and the kid had enough problems to deal with.  

 

“It’s been awhile to be honest but I’m glad we went today,” he said with a genuine smile.  His heart swelled as Samandriel snuggled closer and Benny couldn’t help drawing in the warmth.  He was gaining Samandriel’s trust but he was an idiot to even pretend that it was only to get him to help taking his uncle down.  It had been so long since he’d actually found someone who wanted him without an agenda.  

 

He pulled up to the house and being a gentleman, he walked Samandriel to the front door but didn’t go inside, “There’s somethin I gotta do, call me if you need anything,” Benny said.  Even though the curiosity was strong in Samandriel’s eyes, he went inside with a small wave.  Benny waited until he disappeared up the stairs before closing the door and running back to his car.  He didn’t have very long before Cain would call him and where he needed to go now was almost two hours away.

 

Benny hadn’t been to this part of Massachusetts in a very long time, longer than he was proud to admit.  He was scared that the second he’d step foot in Hyannis, the walls he’d built up would come crumbling down and all the time in the world wouldn’t get them built back up.  Seeing Castiel and that damn ring and having Samandriel ask about it was driving him insane.

 

Thankfully the traffic was light and the road construction found their way onto another main highway but it still took an hour and half to even pull up to the hospital.  Hyannis wasn’t their childhood hometown but it was far enough to keep Dean hidden from unwanted eyes.  Swallowing hard he walked toward the doors with heavy feet, the nurse at the station was one he remembered and she smiled brightly at him.

 

“Benny!  Oh gosh it’s been so long!” Becky beamed at him.  He tried to smile at her but could barely grimace.

 

“Same room?” he asked timidly.  Becky’s smile faltered as she gave him a small nod.  He waved his thanks and trudged toward the elevators.  Dean hadn’t moved from this room in years, kept in the back as if he were some dirty secret.  They had to keep him hidden, that much was true but Benny hated it all.  He turned some corners to find his way toward the more secure areas of the hospital and even had to show his badge to the hospital security guard at the double doors.  

 

Benny stared at the name plaque with tears in his eyes and finally managed to turn the knob, revealing the very still body of his former partner, Dean Winchester.  Even if the plaque said ‘Smith’ Benny would never think of him as anything different.  

 

“H-Hey Dean,” Benny whispered, walking closer to the bed. Someone had recently shaved his face and cut his hair, more than likely his mother Mary.  She had been a physical therapist before all of this and when the call came, she took it upon herself to give Dean his therapy.  Not trusting anyone else to do it.

 

He pulled at the empty chair and sat close to the edge of the bed, “I um, I saw Cas today.  He’s doin better than the last time, he’s much stronger now,” Benny started, not able to stop the overflow of words as he spilled all the gut wrenching secrets he had to keep inside lately.  By the time he was finished, his throat was raw and his eyes burned.

 

“Fuck Dean...I’m so sorry man...fuck I am so sorry,” Benny covered his face and tried to focus on his breathing.  

 

Sam balanced his coffee and the takeout containers, his messenger bag draped sideways across his chest. “Sorry I’m late, Dean I-”

 

He stopped mid-sentence when he saw Benny sitting at his brother’s beside, tear tracks stained down his face. Blinking up at the man he hadn’t seen in months Sam couldn’t help but feel relief and maybe a little anger. He knew the guy was busy and all the undercover RICO unit needed to be careful, but it had been a long time and it didn’t sit well with him. “Oh, hey Benny.”

 

“S-Sammy? Hey, shit I didn’t mean to interrupt your time with him,” Benny stammered, quickly getting up.  He knew Dean’s younger brother was pissed at him, he could feel it pouring off him.  

 

Taking a deep breath, Sam tried to relax. It wasn't fair of him to let his emotions push Benny away. He was arguably Dean’s best friend that wasn't related or  _ Cas, _ who was so much more. Sam knew that had his brother been awake he'd have pulled Benny into a hug just as tightly as the one he’d have given him. 

 

“Nah, it’s okay. I can go eat in the cafeteria if you need some more time... or maybe just over there,” he suggested, pointing his head toward the table in the corner where he’d been working on his thesis the last couple months. 

 

“N-No I’m um, I’m done.  I just, needed to see him,” Benny said, rubbing the back of his neck.  He felt sick and so desperate just to talk to someone.  Letting out a small breathy laugh he moved away from the chair and kept looking around the room.

 

Sam could tell there was something different about the man in front of him than there had been the last time he’d seen him. It was in the hunch of his shoulders and the way the color drained from his face almost immediately after Sam walked in, it was in a lot of other small gestures and the way he didn’t seem to want to be there but couldn’t bring himself to leave either. 

 

“Well you don’t have to leave, Benny. Dean could probably use the company,” Sam admitted, hesitating for only a second before he let out a gust of air, “To be honest, I guess we both could.

 

Benny felt himself nod and a deep swoop of relief that he didn’t need to leave just yet.  He didn’t want to return being Cain’s stupid thug or the one who would inevitably have to bring Samandriel to his first fucking night at the club.  He just wanted to be Benny Lafitte again, partner to one of the best men alive and friend to his younger brother.  Slumping back down in the chair he took in a deep breath and let it out even slower.  

 

“How’ve you been Sam?” Benny asked quietly, knowing he really didn’t have the right to ask him that.

 

“School is going well, I’m setting myself up to be finished this fall. Most of it’s been online classes, but I didn’t want to leave…” he paused, not wanting to make things any more difficult on either of them. He switched focus a little and could see Benny’s relief with it. “I moved to an apartment in town, I needed to have my own space anyway. I love my parents but I’m a grown man now.” 

 

Sam smiled at the memory of the discussion he’d had with his mom. Mary had insisted that he didn’t need to go anywhere, certainly not making rash decisions to move over an hour away to be closer to Dean. It didn’t take long for her to get on board when he’d explained just how much thought had gone into it though. His landlord knows the situation and has promised to let him rent week-to-week.“Other than that, I guess there's not really been much change. How about you?”

 

Benny let out a nervous laugh and shrugged, “Sad to say not much either.  Well, nothing you wanna hear anyway. I did um, see Cas today though,” he said, letting his eyes drop to his hands wringing together in his lap.

 

“How is he? I mean I hear tidbits from Charlie every now and again, spoken in code or whatever but it’s not really enough to judge anything,” Sam confessed, he’d missed his brother’s fiance. 

 

He hadn’t gotten to know him as well as he would have liked, but sometimes Sam was sure that if they could dig in and find the part of Dean that was left in his body that he’d be calling out for Cas more than anything or anyone else. He’d never seen his brother like that over anyone. Despite the coma there seemed to be a physical ache coming off Dean and Sam was convinced it related to Castiel. 

 

Benny swallowed hard, his hands wringing even tighter.  How the hell was he supposed to tell Sam that Castiel was working for the very same people that had hunted down Dean and put him in a damn coma?  That he failed to not only protect his partner but save Castiel from this fucking humiliation and shame.  

 

“He’s doin better,” Benny said, barely even looking up at Sam.  

 

“Well that's nice and vague,” Sam scoffed, running a hand through his hair. It's shorter now than before and he can't hardly wait for the day Dean wakes up and teases him about it. Letting out a huff, he continued. “Don't worry I'll drop it...it just gets a little frustrating being on the outside sometimes.” 

 

Benny sighed and sat up a bit more, “I know Sam and I’m so sorry, God knows how sorry I am,” he chewed on his lip, staring at Sam for a moment before leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees.

 

“I’m working to make this right, the entire thing...I just need a little more time but I’m almost there.”

 

“Benny, by all means do your job but things won't be right until Dean wakes up and that's not really up to you…” Sam only realized how harsh that sounded when he heard Benny let out a shuddered breath. He looked up from where he's been picking at his takeout to see the man literally look broken and then the realization hit home far too late.

 

“You know this isn't your fault, right? You couldn't have prevented this, Benny. You've always kinda gotten under my skin so you should know that I'm not telling you this to spare you any guilt, but because it's true.” Sam paused for a second but finished strong, “Dean would tell you the same thing if he could. He’d open his eyes and give you that look that makes you feel like you're about two inches tall, and he’d say, it's all apart of the job.”

 

“Yeah he would,” Benny huffed out a laugh, taking one more look at his best friend before standing up, “You’re wrong though Sam...what happened to Dean...what’s happening to Cas is my fault.  But I’ll make it right and I’m gonna take down every one of them bastards,” Benny swore, first squeezing Dean’s ankle then Sam’s shoulder.  It didn’t matter how many times Sam tried to beat it into him, Benny would never not feel responsible.

 

Sam knew it wouldn’t do any good to push further so instead he pulled Benny into a quick hug, surprising both of them. He patted a few times on the man’s back. “Take em’ down, Benny and don’t hesitate to come back around if you can. It’s been a while and I’m sure I’m not the only one who’d like to see ya again.”

 

“I’ll try, I promise,” Benny said squeezing Sam tightly before pulling away.  It was then his phone went off and he felt his heart fall when he recognized the number to be Cain’s private line.  

  
“Fuck, I gotta go.  Take care of yourself Sam,” Benny said, giving him a stern look.  He gave the man a small wave then booked it out of the hospital, shooting Cain a vague text that it would take him a bit to get back to the house.  He didn’t receive an answer back but Benny didn’t think too much about it, just got behind the wheel and took off back toward Boston.


	6. Chapter 6

Samandriel looked at the picture he made in the mirror. He didn't see the appeal necessarily but he couldn't help the small smile that formed when he realized how closely he’d mimicked the moves Castiel had taught him. 

 

Benny had taken him to Charlie’s basement nearly every day and they’d spent a few hours rehearsing while the older man found some way to stick close, but not too close. It was both sweet and frustratingly unsatisfying. He wasn't tuned into people the way Cas seemed to be apparently. Samandriel couldn't tell what, if anything Benny felt toward him and he wanted to know more than anything. 

 

He smiled when his favorite Demi Lovato song;  _ Stone Cold  _ streamed into his ear buds at full blast. He'd just finished stretching and rubbing lotion into his legs as it began and was back to work before it hit the first chorus. If he expected to be even remotely comfortable on the stage he couldn't afford to waste any time. 

 

Benny shoved his phone into his back pocket as he roamed around the house.  Cain had requested he stick close today but for the past few hours there had been nothing to occupy his time and Samandriel seemed to have disappeared as well.  He couldn’t help smiling when he thought of the younger boy.  They’d spent so much time together in the past few days Benny could actually feel his very soul lifting up.  The visit to Hyannis had screwed him up so deeply even Castiel had noticed it the moment he brought Samandriel to Charlie’s basement.  He couldn’t tell Cas what was wrong though, hell he couldn't even tell him the truth about Dean.  Castiel had been convincing himself that Dean was alive and Benny never once claimed him to be right or wrong.  It was safer this way.

 

He shook his head vehemently against those thoughts, here in Boston he was Benny Cormier, Cain’s fucking errand boy.  Fuck he needed a strong drink and a cigarette.  He opted for choice number two but just as he was about to sneak downstairs for the gardens, he caught movement through the partially opened door of Samandriel’s bedroom.  Ah, so that’s where he went.  There wasn’t any sound other than someone breathing heavily and the smacks of what he assumed was feet against the wood flooring.

 

As quietly as he could he pushed open the door with his finger tips and felt all the blood drain straight down south.  Samandriel was dancing around the room, using his own skills and the ones Castiel had been teaching him all week.  The only thing the kid had on were some kind of spandex shorts that left nothing to the imagination and all that glorious pale skin was glistening with sweat.  Though the arousal was running strong through him, so was the shame and guilt for having very vivid images of those powerful legs wrapped around Benny’s neck.

 

He had three options, stay and stare like some massive ass creeper, walk away and try to burn the image of Samandriel’s sinewy muscles rippling when he moved or, he could just knock and bring attention to himself.  He was deep in decision mode when Samandriel spun and stopped, those huge blue eyes staring straight at him.

 

“Uh….hi?” Benny laughed, waving stupidly.

 

Samandriel couldn’t help but blush, he knew that soon it wouldn’t matter how nervous he was or how badly he didn’t want to go on stage, he’d end up there regardless. He was actually even starting to think he’d be able to handle it, but dancing for Benny was something different altogether. He felt nervous and shy so unsure of where they were with one another and whether or not he was reading things into their relationship that weren’t really there. 

 

“Hi,” Samandriel bit his lip, pulling out an earbud out as soon as he’d been able to regain some of his composure.

 

“S-Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt.  I was actually just roamin’ the house when I heard something in here,” Benny said, rubbing the back of his neck a little nervously before adding, “Then I got really distracted…”

 

“Oh? What was so distracting?” Samandriel teased, closing the distance between them until he could feel the heat of Benny’s body on his skin. He’d become more and more bold with Benny, still terrified to really make the first move but he’d been doing his best to be flirty and show interest in the ways Cas had taught him to fake for his  _ clients _ . Sometimes he wasn’t sure if it worked at all but others Benny would get this silly smile on his face that made Samandriel’s heart pound faster and feel like he’d turned to goo on the inside.

 

Benny huffed out a laughed and backed up until the door clicked shut behind him.  Samandriel crowded him against the wood and Benny his lip hard, trying to will the lower half of his body to fucking behave itself.  It wasn’t fair, Samandriel started off so shy and innocent and now he was almost exactly like Cas.  Just, more dangerous for Benny because he was actually attracted to Samandriel...really attracted.  

 

“You’re uh, a really good dancer,” Benny said quickly, his eyes closing as Samandriel inched further toward him.  His body was so close it took every will in Benny’s being to not grab at him and really feel how those muscles moved.

 

“Thank you, but I still need more practice...would you mind?” he asked, gesturing toward the chair with a shy but hopeful smile. His heart was hammering in his chest but he couldn’t give up an opportunity to have Benny under him again, to feel their bodies moving together even if it was all a pretense. Samandriel was almost positive if he managed to stay in Benny’s space for a while the man would finally make a move. 

 

“N-No, of course not,” Benny said, mentally cursing himself.  Why was he doing this to himself?  He let out a deep breath and sat down on the chair in the middle of the room.  Deep down he knew exactly why he was allowing this, he was lonely as fuck and needed the touch of another person.  Samandriel was beautiful and seemed to be just as attracted to him.  So instead of the constant berating he was giving himself, he finally relaxed against the chair.  He smiled wolfishly up at Samandriel and wiggled his fingers playfully.

 

“Do I get to touch this time?”

 

“If you’d like,” Samandriel teased, locking the door behind him before moving closer to the chair. He walked with a focus, syncing his music to the speakers as he swayed to the beat. The song had shifted now to  _ Closer _ by Nine Inch Nails, it actually felt perfect for the moment as Samandriel spun around and backed into Benny’s open legs. The chair was almost the perfect height to put his ass in Benny’s face when he bent over. He waited until he had steady hands on Benny’s thighs as he lowered himself down twisting as he popped back up.

 

Benny bit his lip and kept his hands down by his sides for now, just taking in the very lovely view of Samandriel’s tight ass inches away from his face.  This time around he didn't try to hide just how much Samandriel was affecting him, just slouched back even more to make the growing outline in his jeans more prominent.

 

Focusing mostly on the song, Samandriel moved fluidly in front of Benny. Grateful that the man couldn’t see the blush on his cheeks, Samandriel watched as his body roared with interest. His erection barely contained in the thin elastic shorts he’d been wearing. Taking a deep breath, knowing he couldn’t hide it anymore, he turned around. Forcing himself to focus on the routine instead of his own embarrassment, Samandriel slid a knee between the man’s parted thighs and moved closer, brushing his lips along the tanned like of Benny’s thick neck.

 

Benny let out a low growl, his fingers digging into the edges of his chair.  He didn’t want to grab at Samandriel yet, he wanted the control to still be in the younger man’s hands. 

 

“Fuck,” Benny groaned when there was suddenly teeth dragging along the same path soft lips had been just a few seconds ago.

 

He was starting to feel a little unsure, despite the fact that he could practically smell Benny’s reaction to him. The man still hadn’t voluntarily put hands on him, so Samandriel couldn’t quite get past the idea that maybe this was just another way Benny was helping him get prepared. Samandriel pushed the negative thoughts out of his mind, instead balancing on his hands that were placed on the chair arms as he lifted himself onto Benny’s lap. Moaning in relief to have the familiar heat beneath him once again. “You feel so good like this.”

 

“Ungh, so do you sweetheart,” Benny groaned, finally getting his hands on the way too tempting boy now in his lap.  He gripped at those thick thighs and couldn’t help yank him closer so he could further reach that ass.  It was perfect and fit in his palms.  He growled low in his throat again and began to knead his fingers against the spandex. 

 

“Finally,” Samandriel giggled, plastering himself to Benny and rolling his hips until he felt the hard outline of Benny’s cock rubbing against the stretchy fabric of his shorts. He momentarily wished there was nothing between them, but quickly got over it when he remembered Benny’s clenching grip on his waist. “Been waiting forever for you to put your hands on me.”

 

“Well sorry for making you wait, I was trying to be a gentleman,” Benny laughed a bit breathlessly.  Samandriel’s hips were moving relentlessly against him, rolling and circling in ways that was driving him mad.  He shuddered hard and suddenly needed to feel more skin.  Diving his hands into the back of Samandriel’s tight shorts he gripped his ass and squeezed, reveling in the high mewl Samandriel let out.

 

“Fuck I could just eat you all up,” Benny growled, surging forward to start kissing him, pulling roughly at Samandriel’s bottom lip.

 

“Mmmm,” Samandriel moaned, Benny finally giving in was like a dam broke inside him as well. All the things he’d been putting off, everything came flooding back to the surface with just one kiss from Benny. His head was spinning and he just wanted, needed,  _ everything _ . Samandriel’s arms wrapped around the back of Benny’s neck as he tried to pour his own passion into the meeting of teeth and tongues. He was inexperienced and he was sure that much was obvious to someone like Benny, but he tried his hardest anyway. He wanted Benny to know that even if he wasn’t great, that there was nothing he’d rather be doing. 

 

Benny wrapped his arms around Samandriel’s torso and stood up, loving the excited gasp Samandriel made against his lips.  Legs instantly wrapped around his waist and Benny smirked.  

 

“Wanna see every inch of you baby,” Benny whispered, nipping against Samandriel’s jaw line almost sharply before practically tossing the kid onto the bed.  Benny stalked around the bed, keeping his eyes locked on Samandriel’s face, watching as those eyes became darker by the second.  When a deep shudder ran through his body Benny finally grabbed at top of his shorts and started pulling them down slowly.

 

“You tell me to stop and we will,” Benny said, locking eyes with him once more.

 

Unsure if he was able to form complete sentences, Samandriel gave a shaky nod. The gorgeous man in front of him  _ actually wanting him back _ seemed beyond the realm of possibility only hours before. Now though, Benny was looking down at him with dark half lidded eyes and Samandriel was practically leaking from the heat in his gaze.

 

“Good boy,” Benny said, yanking off the shorts and throwing them behind him somewhere.  Samandriel’s cock was much smaller than his own but it was hard and leaking against his stomach.  Benny kept their eyes locked as he licked one long stripe up to the head and giving it a gentle suck.

 

“Mmm, you want me to take care of you baby?’ Benny asked, dragging his blunt nails along the outsides of Samandriel’s quivering thighs.

 

“N-not that, ch-cher, please.” Samandriel begged, the intensity of Benny’s gaze heating his skin. Everything was intoxicating for Samandriel. Each touch like a shot of whiskey frying his brain with pleasure and happiness. He nodded again, this time determined to use his words though, no matter how difficult it might be to find them. 

 

“Y-yes. P-please, Benny,” he stopped to let out a low whine as the gorgeous pink lips split open over the head of his cock again. 

 

Benny grinned and kissed the tip teasingly, keeping hold of Samandriel’s hip to keep them from pushing up, “Sure thing, cher,” Benny responded before sucking Samandriel down, his throat vibrating with a moan as the taste hit his tongue.  He almost tasted sweet and for once he was grateful the kid had a very strict diet of fruits for damn near every meal.  Bobbing his head a few times he got his throat used to being stretched open again before letting go of Samandriel’s hips.

 

Samandriel knew he wasn’t going to last long. Benny’s mouth felt so warm and tight that he was clawing at the bedspread in a few short seconds, gripping at what he knew was his restraint slipping away from him. He’d never had anything like this and the fact that it was  _ Benny _ only made it even more difficult to keep from spilling in under a minute. Unintentionally, he reached for Benny’s head and began to tug on the short strands of hair as the man took him apart with just his mouth. “I-I c-can’t-t  _ holdon _ .”

 

Benny moaned around Samandriel’s length, his throat open and relaxed the moment he decided to start thrusting up.  There was a hand in his hair but the other was scrambling for something to hold onto and Benny quickly weaved their fingers together.  He didn’t know if it was him swallowing around the head of Samandriel’s cock or him squeezing his fingers but suddenly his back arched high off the bed with a shout and came down his throat.  Benny swallowed every drop and continued to suck and lick all around Samandriel’s softening cock until the kid whined almost pathetically at him.

 

“Mmm, so good for me cher,” Benny said, his voice a little rougher than usual.

 

Samandriel felt dopey and exhausted to the point of excess but he wanted more than anything to get his hands on Benny, to have him closer and wrapped around him as tightly as possible. Feeling a little untethered, Samandriel was still able to make grabby hands at the gorgeous man and whine pathetically enough to have Benny grinning and moving up the bed beside him. Before he really understood what he was doing, Samandriel already had Benny pulled closer and was sucking greedily at his lips and tongue, wanting to share the taste of himself and Benny together. 

 

Benny grinned against the eager lips kissing at him and gently cupped the side of Samandriel’s face to make him slow down a bit, waiting until Samandriel melted against the mattress before he began to slowly devour his mouth.  Benny sucked and nibbled at his bottom lip before sensually rolling their tongues together.  Samandriel had started out unsure and just a slight bit sloppy but the kid was a fast learner and soon had Benny panting against his mouth.

 

And of course, the moment Samandriel reached for the button of his jeans, his phone went off.

 

“Fuck,” Benny groaned, wanting nothing more than to ignore it but knew if he did, Cain would send someone to “fetch” him.  He didn’t think his boss would take too kindly of Benny deflowering his nephew.  He managed to pry his phone out of his back pocket and bit down on his lip as Samandriel started to suck on his neck.

 

“This is Benny,” he said, clearing his throat.

 

Samandriel backed away like he’d been burnt at the serious tone Benny’s voice had taken. It was almost like he was a completely different person. He swallowed hard as a traitorous part of his mind asked which one was real. He didn't move too far away though, even the  _ professional _ version of Benny was someone he trusted, whether it was a wise choice or not. 

 

Benny listened intently to Cain’s instructions and let out a soundless sigh, his head falling against Samandriel’s shoulder.

 

“Yes sir, I’ll meet you in the garage,” Benny answered, making sure the other end clicked and he hung up himself.  The phone was carelessly tossed to the empty part of the bed before he pecked at Samandriel’s lips.

 

“I gotta go cher,” he sighed again.

 

“Okay,” Samandriel answered, it wasn't as if he could beg Benny not to leave his side, not after what they’d shared or how he'd desperately wanted to try to repay him. Well, he could beg but in the end he knew Benny would leave because he had to, and Samandriel didn't enjoy looking like a desperate child, so he kept his mouth shut and watched as Benny walked out and took his heart with him.

 

Benny hesitated at the door for a moment.  When he turned back the look on Samandriel’s face didn’t sit well in his stomach and before he realized what he was doing he was crossing back toward the bed.  He hovered over Samandriel’s body and kissed him deeply, “I-If you want, I can try to sneak back in once I’m done?” Benny asked softly, dragging his thumb across Samandriel’s cheek.

 

“Always,” he confessed, feeling a dopey grin pulling at his lips. It was foolish, sure but he was falling head over heels for Benny and there was nothing he could do about it anymore. 

 

Benny smiled and kissed him one more time before finally moving off the bed and out of the room.  Once the door was closed he let his head fall back and he sighed.  What the fuck was he doing?  His phone buzzed in his pocket and he was hurrying through the house toward the garage.


	7. Chapter 7

“You did very well Benny and from what I hear you’ve been taking wonderful care of Samandriel.  That poor boy didn’t smile once when he first got here,” Cain said, clapping him on the shoulder.  Benny winced and fought the urge to deck the guy.  Of course Samandriel wasn’t happy, he was being forced into something he clearly didn’t want.  Benny shook it off and listened to Cain’s briefing, the door leading to the very room he was dying to get into opened and Amara stepped out.  She looked stunning in the very simple yet revealing black dress but he didn’t allow his eyes to linger.  For multiple reasons.

 

“Benny, you look exhausted.  Why don’t you stay here for the night instead of that horrendous apartment of yours,” Amara offered.  Benny opened his mouth to deny it but stopped, if he was already sleeping here it would be much easier to explain him suddenly being there in the morning. Cain waved his hand at the suggestion and soon Amara was handing him a key to one of the guest rooms upstairs.  It was all too perfect and easy for him to slip into the other end of the house and gently knock on the door of Samandriel’s room.  There was no answer at first and he nearly gave up when the doorknob turned and very sleepy blue eyes peered out at him.

 

“Benny?” Samandriel asked, confused with sleep and blurred vision. He wiped at his eyes, but it didn't really help all that much. Samandriel was exhausted and he’d only just fallen asleep what felt like a second ago. “Am I dreaming?”

 

“Nah cher, it’s me.  You still want me to come in?” Benny asked, nervously looking down the hall.  All the guards should be outside but it would be his luck that one of them was strolling through the house.

 

Samandriel opened the door wider and moved to make space for Benny, “Of course, come in.

 

He grabbed up Benny’s hand still not sure if it was a dream or not, but he didn't think dream

Benny would mind if they held hands as he pulled himself back to bed, dragging the gorgeous man along with him. 

 

Benny chuckled when Samandriel tried to manhandle him into the bed but he stopped him, getting his clothes and shoes chucked off until he was in his undershirt and briefs.  Then he allowed Samandriel to pull him under the covers and drape himself over Benny’s chest.

 

“Sorry for having to rush out earlier cher,” Benny said, his body losing almost all of it’s tension.

 

“S’okay dream Benny, I still like you,” Samandriel confessed, his mind dulled with sleep and comfort. The warmth of dream Benny’s body against his own felt like laying by a fireplace and snuggling close to a giant puppy or something. It was amazing. 

 

Benny chuckled and kissed the top of Samandriel’s head, “Go to sleep cher,” he said softly, dragging his hand up and down Samandriel’s back.  It wasn’t long until his breaths evened out and he grew completely lax against his chest.  Benny gently eased them on their sides where he could spoon the younger man and buried his face into the back of Samandriel’s neck.  

 

The next morning he awoke with a start, something in the hallway making him jerk awake.  There were voices right outside the room that had him cursing and yet thanking Samandriel for thinking to lock the door.

 

“Hey, hey wake up cher,” Benny said softly, his hand gently shaking Samandriel’s hip.

 

Samandriel was ripped from a delicious dream featuring a lusty-eyed Benny and a pair of pale blue panties. He was furious for all of two seconds until he realized that it was Benny who’d woken him up. “Hello.”

 

“Hello beautiful,” Benny smiled, loving way too much the blush that blossomed on Samandriel’s cheeks.  There were voices again outside but were closer this time.

 

“I think someone’s coming down here,” he whispered and sure enough there was a steady sounds of footsteps growing closer in the hall.  Benny hissed out a curse.  He pecked at Samandriel’s lips and dove for his clothes to hurry into the closet to hide.

 

Samandriel groaned, he hated having Benny taken away from him. He was only allowed a few seconds to wallow, though. Almost immediately after Benny was tucked away into the closet a heavy knock sounded against his door. He was still sleepy and a little grumpy so he used that to make him sound as normal as possible. 

 

“Just a minute,” he grumbled. Samandriel grabbed his hoodie from the nightstand and pulled it on before answering the door.

 

“Ah nephew, there you are,” Amara said as cheerfully as she could muster at the moment, “Your uncle wishes to take you to Bloodlust today so you can get a feel for the club and do a dress rehearsal of some sort.”

 

“Okay,” he responded, trying hard not to make the same disgusted face he inevitably always made when someone mentioned the club. He knew his aunt would try to get him out of it again if he let his true feelings show. Samandriel didn't want to see what happened if she did. He pulled on his most comfortable hoodie, it practically swallowed him but it was warm and it always left him feeling like there was a barrier between him and the rest of the world. He wasn’t getting fully dressed, not when it was perfectly acceptable for him to go in something more comfortable. As soon as Samandriel had noticed that his aunt turned away he chanced one last glance toward his closet. Feeling a hole boring out in his chest at the idea of leaving Benny, and having to face it all alone. 

 

“I’m ready, let’s go.”

 

Benny watched as Samandriel and Amara both left the room and sighed heavily.  He was hoping that Amara would request that he drive them but she was using her own driver Abby.  Sometimes he swore there was more going on between them but that was far more drama than he really needed to think about.  

 

He waited a good five minutes before he eased out of the closet and was just about tiptoe out of the room when his cellphone went off.  The number wasn’t one he recognized but the words of the text made his heart skip a beat and in a hopeful way.

 

**Message from Unknown:** _ Call Vic, he’s got news. _

* * *

  
  


The club was actually a lot nicer than he’d expected. Of course, that might just be the fact that they’d only finished construction a few days earlier. Samandriel couldn’t help but imagine it just as bad as the other within a month or two. He did the routine he’d practiced over the last week, twisting and spinning around the pole while also throwing in some of his classical training when he drifted too far and needed an anchor. Samandriel watched as his aunt went from surprised to reluctant approval and he let out a sigh of relief. It seemed that even in his frumpy clothes he managed to get a few leers from the employees that were preparing everything to open, so he guessed that it was acceptable. 

 

Samandriel hurried off stage and pulled his aunt out by the hand. He only had a few more hours of freedom left, he wanted to get back to the palace and find Benny.

 

Amara sat in the back of her car with her nephew next to her and had absolutely nothing to say.  She wanted to tell him how proud she was of him and how sorry she was that Cain was doing this to him.  She prayed that Samandriel knew, even if it was silent that she was on his side.  Without breaking her straight backed composure, she reached over and squeezed Samandriel’s wrist.  The moment didn’t last long, they were back at the compound and she quickly released him to crawl out of the now opened door.

 

Her nephew breezed past her and before she could stop herself, she called out his name.  When he turned to give her that cold glare that was settling deep in his eyes and becoming a normal thing for him she merely just smiled and waved him off.

 

“Stay strong Amara,” Abby whispered behind her.  She took in a deep breath and nodded, heading straight into the house and to her husband.

* * *

 

Samandriel glanced around what he could see of the house, hoping to spot the now achingly familiar form of Benny Cormier. He couldn’t actively search, for fear that his uncle would find out and begin prying even further into their relationship, whatever that was. So instead, he sighed and moved down the long empty hallway until he could step out into the gorgeous garden they had in the back. He’d almost considered stopping in his room for a book, but Samandriel enjoyed watching the the place fill with a living energy that seemed to be something more than just the plants and the smaller animals and insects who stuck around.

 

Benny had just stepped out of the utility shed when he saw Samandriel for a split second, disappearing through the gates of the gardens.  His contact’s information had old news at best but it helped Benny not feel so alone in this damn case.  Victor was undercover as well but in a completely different family and they never met up in person.  Shaking his head he shoved the phone into his pocket and debated whether to follow Samandriel or head back inside to find Cain.  

 

It was nearing five o’clock and he knew Cain would be in that damn room with Amara.  They’d be in there for hours until Cain needed to get to his other clubs and appointments.  Without another thought he hurried toward the gardens as well, the need to make sure Samandriel was okay burning deep in his chest.

 

The gardens were huge, almost bigger than the house and easily had several hiding places.  But the best were inside the small little maze that hardly anyone knew how to get to the middle.  Benny knew of course, it was one of the first things he figured out.  It took a few minutes to finally find the kid but there he was, standing with his back to Benny and his fingers brushing over one of the many jasmine bushes.  Benny grinned and quietly made his way over to him.  Once he was within reach he quickly covered Samandriel’s mouth with one hand while the other arm wrapped around his waist tightly, pulling him back flush against Benny’s body.

 

“Hi cher,” Benny whispered against his ear once the initial surprised squeak came out all muffled against his hand.

 

Samandriel almost screamed on instinct but the natural way the larger body fit against his and the soft stubble of Benny’s beard moving beside his neck, reassured him. He almost melted into the gorgeous man behind him, the warmth of his strong arms and the scent of his woodsy cologne had Samandriel practically salivating to get closer in any capacity.

 

“Hi,” he whispered back, biting his lip when he turned around to face Benny. The man was beautiful any time, but in the sunlight there was something else, something that made Benny come to life. 

 

“C’mon,” Benny said, taking Samandriel’s hand in his own and guided him through the opening to the maze.  There was a small tug on his arm but when he turned to look at Samandriel he had a very unsure confused look on his face.  Benny quickly glanced through the opening before stealing a much too quick kiss.

 

“Trust me,” he said, gently tugging back at Samandriel’s hand.

 

Nodding immediately, Samandriel almost found himself surprised by how quickly he’d given Benny his trust. Normally he was far more reserved than people imagined. He’d be as friendly and kind as possible to anyone he was forced to associate with, but it was nothing like the relationship he shared with Benny. He usually forgot about everyone else when he was finally alone again, now it didn’t matter what time of day or night his thoughts were almost always invaded by simple reminders or memories of he and Benny throughout their short but meaningful friendship.

 

The path to the middle was a dizzying one, with too many turns and back tracks but at some point, Benny got too impatient and pinned Samandriel to one of the walls made of leaves.  He kissed him deeply, getting his arms wrapped around him again.

 

“Was worried about you,” Benny managed to grumble out between nibbles to Samandriel’s bottom lip.

 

“I-mm I missed you but I was okay, It..wasn’t that bad, yet.” Samandriel said, smiling into the kiss. The club was a sore spot for him and he wanted to grumble and whine about it but with Benny’s lips and hands and  _ everything _ on him, he couldn’t really give a damn. Too much happiness and excitement brewing in his veins. 

 

“Mmm, one more,” Samandriel teased, standing up on his tippy toes to make himself look a little more silly. He loved the sound of Benny’s laugh and he’d do it a hundred more times just to hear it. 

 

Benny cupped the sides of Samandriel’s face and kissed him once more, playfully tugging at his lip with teeth, “C’mon, I’ll kiss you some more once we reach the middle,” Benny promised.  It didn’t take much longer and when they finally did reach the center he couldn’t help grinning at the surprised little gasp.  There was a cute little gazebo with very sheer curtains surrounding it, keeping the bugs out.  A small pond sat next to it that Benny was sure had Koi fish but he never stayed too long to actually see them. 

 

“Pretty ain’t it?” Benny asked, the corner of his mouth lifting up in a smirk. 

 

“It’s gorgeous,” Samandriel confessed. His breath escaping leaving him to gasp a little at the new view. He’d been to his uncle’s house quite a few times and he’d loved the garden immediately. Samandriel had spent most of his time at the palace either strolling through the garden or looking at it from inside his window. “I’ve never dared to try the maze again. I uh-I got lost inside it and nearly had a panic attack waiting on my father and Aunt Amara to find me. This though, might have been worth trying again.”

 

Benny grinned, leading him closer to the gazebo.  When he had first explored the center of the maze he had assumed that couches or maybe just a bench would be there but instead it was a huge flat cushion that was the entire space of the gazebo.  There were tons of pillows and blankets too but as far as Benny knew, no one used this space.  Ever.  So it was just the gardeners who cleaned it up twice a week.

 

He playfully picked Samandriel up and fell back against the plush cushion, nearly barking out a laugh when Samandriel made the cutest squeaking noise.

 

Samandriel didn’t doubt that Benny would keep him safe but he was still a little surprised by how soft the landing was. Everything around them was beautiful and if he thought he could hide away in that place forever, he’d certainly try. Maybe not forever, maybe only a little bit longer, but he wanted it for as long as possible and the fact that Benny was there only made it that much more important. Unable to keep his focus drawn away from his upcoming performance at the club, Samandriel slid a finger down the valley between Benny’s pecs and tilted his head. “Are you going to be there… tonight?”

 

“Of course,” Benny smiled softly, his hand raising up to drag his fingers down the side of Samandriel’s face and neck a couple times before his thumb traced firmly along his jawline.

 

“Cain’s basically appointed me as your personal bouncer.  Any douchebag who gets too close or makes you uncomfortable I’ll kick his smarmy ass out of the club.  You may be forced to dance for them but they don’t own you cher,” Benny said, tilting up Samandriel’s face so he could look him in the eyes.

 

He was relieved to hear the news, no one had told him that he’d been assigned to Benny or vice a versa. Samandriel’s lip trembled a little as his nerves caught up with him. He knew he was pushing his luck, that no matter how many times Benny pulled him in for a kiss or curled up behind him in bed, it could all come crashing down. “So...who does? Who owns me?

 

“You own yourself sweetheart,” Benny said softly, his chest squeezing painfully.  Samandriel was so young, he shouldn’t be having to ask such a weighted question like that.  He should be able to wake up every morning and know that he was free to do and be whatever he wanted. 

 

Benny moved slowly, positioning himself to hover over Samandriel and he watched in awe as that uncertainty and fear bleed right out of those eyes, “You belong only to yourself cher,” he said even softer and needy hands gripped at his shoulders, pulling him down to be met with even hungrier lips.  Samandriel’s arms and legs wrapped tightly around him and Benny deepened the kiss, alternating between sucking greedily at Samandriel’s tongue and plunging his own into the other’s mouth.  With each touch and taste, Benny silently vowed he would keep Samandriel safe and when this was all over he’d make damn sure Samandriel wouldn’t be touched.

 

Feeling a little more reassured, especially now that Benny clarified he wasn’t just another person waiting to make a more permanent mark on him. Though the idea sent a shiver up his spine. With a tad more confidence, Samandriel bit his lip as a smile outgrew the gesture and lit up his face. “Okay, then who do I belong  _ with?” _

 

Benny huffed out a laugh, kissing at Samandriel’s jaw a few times, “Well if ya really want somethin like that...me?  Maybe?” Benny asked a little shyly.  There was a part of him, screaming why the fuck he was doing this but how could he not?  Especially with the way Samandriel was looking at him right then.  No one else was going to stand up and protect this beautiful boy so fuck it, may as well dive all the way in. 

 

Samandriel’s heart skipped and then his pulse spiked a little. He didn’t need to be claimed, or anything, though he had to admit a large part of him wanted nothing more, but he honestly just loved hearing that Benny would want him, want him past the primal urge to work toward whatever they’ve been going toward the last week. He hadn’t known it, but Samandriel now believed he’d been looking for somewhere to belong and it felt like Benny could and wanted to give him that. “I-I’ve been wondering what it would be like...to belong to-with you, I guess it’s probably weird that I was both proud and disappointed when you didn’t take the chance to claim me.” 

 

“Nah, it ain’t weird cher, promise,” Benny said, rolling onto his side and pulled Samandriel in close.  “We just barely met but whatever this is between us is intense and there’s so much going on this week that it would irresponsible of me to stake my claim on something so important.” 

 

Benny kissed at Samandriel’s lips before pressing their foreheads together, “Of everything that is forcing your hand and rushing you into things...let’s take our time with this...okay?” 

 

Samandriel nodded even though he didn’t really want to, but he wouldn’t rush Benny, wouldn’t push him into it. He knew that the man was trying to be considerate of what  _ he _ wanted, but at the same time it was clear that things were moving too fast for the both of them, even if it felt right. 

  
“Okay, yeah.. That’s yeah-,” he answered, flailing a little but he relaxed as soon as he felt the familiar pull of Benny’s arms bringing him in for another kiss. It was slow paced and it made his skin tingle in a new and different way than ever before. He stretched out, tucking himself into Benny’s side as he tried not to think about what would happen once he was forced out of this gorgeous cocoon. 


	8. Chapter 8

Benny was chewing on his thumbnail and if he didn’t stop, he’d be down to the bone in a matter of minutes.  They were at Bloodlust and Samandriel was minutes from coming on stage.  He was the opening routine, mainly a test to see how the so called gentlemen of the club would react to him.  Cain wasn’t an idiot, he knew exactly how these leeches would take someone as beautiful as Samandriel. 

 

He glanced up at the balcony, the private area for Cain and any of his VIP’s and sure enough, the man himself was up there with Amara at his side.  Someone else that Benny couldn’t recognize due to the dark lighting was on Cain’s other side.  He didn’t dwell on it, probably just another person Cain controlled in this damn town.  

 

Thankfully the doors were finally being closed, the last “guest” being seated in one of the overly plush booths.  Covered in a dark crimson velvet that was on the edge of being too soft.  They were everywhere, positioned so that everyone could easily see the stage.  That in itself was miraculous to look at.  It almost resembled an old theatre vibe with heavy curtains but the catwalk jutting through the middle of the club ruined that effect just a slight.  There was a total of three poles on the stage and Benny tried to not think too much of Samandriel wrapped around one.

 

The lights dimmed and Benny pushed off from the stage, going from overly worried boyfriend from domineering bodyguard within seconds.  Some douche appeared through the curtains and Benny wanted to knock his teeth out already.

 

“Welcome to the opening of Bloodlust!  Making this the 10th club under our wonderful host, Cain Angelo!” the guy called out and Benny had to keep himself from rolling his eyes at the thunderous applause.  Cain merely nodded, holding his wine glass out before taking a step back to stand beside Amara once again.  

 

“Now, we have a special treat for you all.  A new beautiful dancer who is making debut here, right on this stage.  Please help me welcome, Little Bluebird!” 

 

Benny winced as the applause and whistles echoed off the walls.  Thank God they shut up when the lights dimmed and soon the music began to reverberate along the floor.

 

Samandriel took a deep breath, centering himself as best he could. The music was starting to pick up and he’d have to slide out onto the stage soon. His pulse was rocketing through his veins, adding steadily to the drumbeats in his ears. He shook his hands and flexed his fingers in an attempt to get rid of the last of his nerves before literally gliding toward center stage. Samandriel focused on himself, on the song, on his own limbs, drowning out the crowd completely.

 

In a flash the whole thing was over and he was letting out heated pants as he fumbled to get away from the hot lights and disgusting offers being called out to him. When he finally made it back to Benny it took everything inside him to not just melt into the man’s arms and beg to never have to go back out there ever again. The dancing itself was exhilarating but the moment it was over he wasn’t sure that he’d ever really feel clean again. 

 

The second the music had stopped, Benny was hurrying back stage.  Samandriel looked two seconds from collapsing into a melt down.  He had his jacket off and around his quivering shoulders in seconds.  The plan was to take Samandriel immediately home to stir up the curiosity about the newest dancer and he was just about to do that when someone slowly clapping appeared around the corner.

 

“You did exceptionally well my boy!  Listen to them calling for you, what a success!” Cain bellowed, the smile on his face dark and dangerous.  Amara stood just slightly behind him, concern etched on her features.  It confused Benny a little but he ignored it in favor of trying to keep Samandriel on his feet.

 

Samandriel couldn’t wait to get back to the palace, even though he knew he wouldn’t be nearly as lucky the next night. It was all too much and he just wanted to be surrounded by Benny and the quiet, he just needed to be able to think again. He couldn’t bring himself to respond, he certainly didn’t want to listen to the lude statements and swears being thrown out at him. Instead he nodded at his uncle, it was the only thing he could think of that wouldn’t be seen as disrespectful. 

 

“Cain, let him return home to recover,” Amara said, her eyes never once leaving Samandriel.  Cain waved his hand a bit dismissively and took a few steps toward them.  Benny squeezed at the younger boy’s waist and swallowed hard as Cain grabbed Samandriel’s chin and slowly turned his face.

 

“You did very well tonight Samandriel and you  _ will _ be a wonderful addition to this club,” Cain said, the praise laced with threat.  Benny felt a deep shudder run through Samandriel and it took everything to not pull the poor guy away from Cain’s grasp.

 

Samandriel swallowed hard, his body itching to flinch away from his uncle. He kept himself in check long enough to reply, knowing he couldn’t get out of it again. “Of course, Uncle.”

 

Cain pursed his lips before that dangerous smile returned, “That’s a good boy.  Benny, take him home,” he said, turning gracefully on his heel as he led Amara back upstairs.  

 

Benny let out a long breath, “C’mon cher,” he said softly, grabbing up Samandriel’s bag with one hand while the other stayed wrapped tight around his waist.  Instead of opening the back seat of his car, he got Samandriel into the front and quickly dropped down behind the wheel.

 

“Do you wanna go back or do you want me to just drive?” Benny asked.

 

As soon as Benny was seated Samandriel was scrambling to get closer, he would have ridden in the man’s lap if it wasn’t a safety concern. Instead he tried to calm himself down, sniffling in at the base of Benny’s neck and drawing in his scent. It took a few beats for him to get his breathing regulated and his pulse under control. As soon as he thought he could speak, Samandriel tried to answer. “I-I don’t care, just get me out of here, please.”

 

Benny nodded and tore out of the parking lot, not even caring if the other bouncers saw him.  He almost took Samandriel home but instead took a completely different path.  He remembered the complete look of elation when he saw the lake and hoped it would help soothe out the raw nerves Samandriel was probably feeling.  

 

Benny gritted his teeth when he suddenly remembered the night after Castiel’s first show.  He’d only gone because he owed Dean and he had to see what his mistakes were costing his loved ones.  The moment Cas got behind the curtain he had thrown up, curled up in a ball on the couch and couldn’t stop crying.  Benny refused to let Samandriel crash that hard.

 

“Shh, I’m here sweetheart,” Benny cooed when a soft mewl vibrated against his ear.  Once he was pulled up in his usual parking spot in front of the lake he tugged Samandriel into his lap, holding him close.

 

It was easy to let himself drop when he was tucked into Benny’s warmth and he could hear the steady, calming beat of the man’s heart through his shirt. The feel of strong arms wrapped around him and the earthy scent that always seemed to keep him from drowning, was doing it’s job. He was still shaking and feeling much too exposed despite the fact that he was still mostly covered, and he’d been much more comfortable in less with Benny as his audience, Samandriel hated the sickening feeling in his gut leftover from the panic of the stage, he wanted to hurl, to scream or cry or something to get it all out but he dreading leaving Benny’s arms even more. 

 

“What can I do to help you?” Benny asked softly, gently moving one hand under the jacket to touch the almost frigid skin of Samandriel’s back.  It was still warm outside but he reached over anyway to turn the heater on low.  

 

Honestly, Samandriel wasn’t sure. He just knew that he needed Benny and that nothing else seemed to matter outside of that. Not at the moment anyway. He wasn’t used to being so uncertain, especially about his own needs and wants but his uncle’s plans for him threw everything he thought out the window and made him feel lost. He laced their fingers together, peppered kisses down the side of Benny’s neck and let out a shaky breath. ‘This, just...just this.”

 

Benny nodded and continued to hold the boy close, his fingers drawing small circles along his spine.  Samandriel was getting warmer and he smelled so sweet, despite the clinging “club” scent that was still there.  They sat like that for a really long time, Benny not even caring how late it got.  Cain wouldn’t bother him for the rest of the night unless it was an emergency.  At one point he thought Samandriel had fallen asleep but soon those thin deft fingers were fidgeting with the buttons on his henley.

 

“You doin’ okay?” Benny asked just above a whisper.

 

Samandriel did his best to not laugh at Benny, the man looked worried but also a little scared and to him, that was hilarious. Instead, he chose to hide his laugh with a kiss. Samandriel surged forward drawing Benny’s bottom lip between his teeth and moaning at the hint of taste he got from it. Samandriel cupped the roughly stubbled sides of Benny’s face and tugged him closer, pushing himself in to the kiss and letting all the comfort he’d been given surround him like hard armor against his nervous instincts. 

 

Benny smiled against Samandriel’s lips, allowing for the other to lead this kiss into something even more hungry.  The angle was awkward for him, his neck was cramping up and he finally gave in.  Gripping at Samandriel’s waist he scooted his seat back and maneuvered him to straddle his legs.

 

“That’s better, c’mere,” he groaned, pulling Samandriel close again as he started lick his way into his mouth.

 

Samandriel let out a small chuckle against Benny’s mouth before pulling back. He bit his lip but quickly got over the small swirl of anxious nerves weaving through his gut. “I-I want to do something, and if you want me to stop, just say so… okay?” 

 

Benny quirked up a brow, “Okay,” he said simply, pulling him back in for another kiss.  There was a small movement, whether it was intentional or not but he felt the hard outline of Samandriel’s arousal and he groaned.  He couldn’t help dragging his nails up the outsides of Samandriel’s thighs and grabbing at his ass.

 

He whined a little when he felt Benny’s hands on him, it was the most sexual thing they’d done since the man mentioned wanting to take things slowly, and although he could almost still imagine the way Benny’s mouth felt wrapped around him, Samandriel wanted, needed more, to feel like he was in control of what happened. 

 

Samandriel left a small and probably too quick trail of kisses down Benny’s neck as he pulled at the hem of his henley. As soon as he got the man out of his shirt though he was following the trail south to at least give Benny an idea of what he was thinking. He smiled when he heard a quiet curse and a loud moan almost side by side as the man realized what he’d meant. He almost reached for the zipper, eager to experiment with his mouth but his hand brushed over the massive bulge in Benny’s jeans and pulled out a delicious sound from the man. Samandriel wouldn’t give that up too quickly. His fingers traced the edges of the stretched fabric where it tapered in around Benny’s cock and squeezed at the warm thickness under his palm.

 

“Mmm, fuck cher that feels good,” Benny growled out, letting his head fall back as Samandriel squeezed him almost too tight.  The kid was inexperienced but his eagerness totally made up for it.

 

“Wanna move to the backseat?’ Benny asked a little breathlessly.

 

“No, want you just like this.” Samandriel had forged many fantasies centered around Benny being behind the wheel of his gorgeous car. It probably wasn't the best position but he was in control and it was what he wanted. He did reach over and pull on the lever, making sure the seat was paid as far back as possible. It wasn't, which meant Benny made and adorable flustered noise and Samandriel giggled. He wasn't prepared for this, hadn't watched countless hours of porn to convince himself he had any idea what to do, but he was surprisingly calm. 

 

He was ready. 

 

Digging into the thick fabric of Benny’s jeans, Samandriel tugged the zipper down and quickly undid the clasp. he was fumbling but, he still managed to help Benny shove his pants and boxers down to his knees. Samandriel let out a shaky whine at his first glimpse of the uncovered flesh.

 

“Wow,” he answered, unconsciously licking at his lips.

 

“All for you sweetheart,” Benny grinned, his jerking up into Samandriel’s too loose fist.  Curious fingers traced at the veins along his shaft and Benny shuddered hard.  He wanted to grab at his hand and teach him but he also wanted to let Samandriel explore on his own.  His eyes damn near rolled back when another set of fingers started touch and squeeze at his balls.  

 

“Shit, oh fuck do that again,” Benny growled, his fingers digging into Samandriel’s thighs as he tugged gently on his balls again

 

Samandriel stretched the skin a little as he pulled down on smooth orb in his hand. He loved the sounds it was bringing out of Benny and filed that away for something to remember later. He slowly rubbed his thumb over the sensitive sac and was again rewarded with a raspy breath. Samandriel could barely take his eyes off Benny but the sight of his erection plumping up even more was difficult to ignore. 

 

He moved closer to where he wanted to be, readjusting himself in the seat until he was basically on his knees and elbows hovering over Benny’s delicious looking cock. Tentatively, he slid his tongue across the tip and almost purred when it immediately brought Benny’s hand to the back of his neck. There was no pressure, no guidance even just the strong reminder of the man's calming presence. 

 

Benny finally let his eyes close as he tried to keep calm.  He wasn’t about to lose all his control and cum before Samandriel even got started.  Instead he focused on massaging the back of Samandriel’s neck, the way the muscles shifted with each curious lick to his shaft. 

 

Benny tasted like salty sweat and musk. It wasn't bad but coupled with the woodsy scent that seemed buried beneath every inch of the man's skin it was almost intoxicating. He was curious, had been for many years but he'd never imagined himself this eager to lick and suck and taste. Samandriel was still holding himself back a little, wanting to take his time and savor the moment. He wasn't sure if or when they'd have the time to spare again. 

 

Samandriel let out a small moan as he noticed a white drop of cum forming in the small slit on the thick head of Benny’s cock. He easily swiped it off with his tongue and whined when he felt the pulse through the shaft against his palm. The droplet was salty and bitter but Samandriel didn't care he slid his mouth over the tip and gave quick hard sucks hoping for more of it, for more of him.

 

“Oh my God, fuck,” Benny panted, dragging his fingers through Samandriel’s hair.  His mouth was so tight and wet around his aching cock it took all his will power to not thrust up into it.  Samandriel wasn’t holding back though, he tried to take too much and gagged a little.  Benny tugged on his hair a bit until he was sitting up and Benny kissed at his already puffy lips.

 

“Don’t push yourself,” Benny panted sucking the taste of himself off of Samandriel’s’ bottom lip.

 

Samandriel felt himself turn red but surprisingly it didn't bother him. He felt sheepish for trying to take too much but couldn't feel guilty knowing the thoughts that were filling his head at the moment. He'd take more of Benny at any cost, even if it meant he went too far occasionally. He pushed forward for one more kiss before going back to the shiny slick head of Benny’s dick. 

 

He moved slower this time but his sucks were just as eager and his hands even more so. Samandriel squeezed at the base and tugged gently on the swollen sac as he clenched his jaws tightly around the tip and begged for another taste. 

 

Benny gritted his teeth, the all too familiar tug in his gut making his breathing a bit heavier.  Dragging his fingers through Samandriel’s hair he couldn’t help thrusting up just a little bit.  It felt too good, the delicious wet heat sending sparks of sharp pleasure racing through his veins.  

 

“I’m gonna cum cher,” Benny grunted, his legs spreading as far as they could to allow Samandriel more room.

 

Excited by the thought of having Benny fill his throat, Samandriel did what he could to take more. He made sure to stop before it became overwhelming but he was sucking down over half of Benny’s long, thick shaft and stroking what he wasn’t sure he could swallow. He let out a low growly moan at the bursts of salt on the back of his tongue which only seemed to make Benny even more eager to release. 

 

Samandriel moved the one hand he had squeezing at the muscled flesh of Benny’s thigh back to the now heavy orbs and repeated the motions he’d used earlier. It was harder to tug on them now that they were round and full, but he managed to roll them in his palm and clench his hand around them bringing out some of the most devastating sounds from Benny.

 

Benny let out a litany of curses and Samandriel’s name, most of which came out as a jumbled mess.  His lower stomach was spasming with each hard suck or tug to his body and finally Benny yanked on Samandriel’s hair.

 

“Open your mouth,” he managed to grit out as he took over stroking his cock.  Samandriel looked up at him with wide eyes but when that mouth dropped open and a hungry mewl came out Benny lost it.  He damn near roared as he came, getting most of it into Samandriel’s mouth but a few stripes hit him on the cheek and neck.

 

“Fuck, jesus fuck,” Benny gasped as he tried to catch his breath.

 

It felt odd to have the warm fluid spurt onto his face but Samandriel caught as much of it as he could, quickly swallowing what landed on his tongue. The look of pure satisfaction on Benny’s face had him darting toward the deflating tip to suck at the few drops he missed there, before using Benny’s discarded shirt to wipe what he couldn’t reach with his tongue off of his face and neck. 

 

With a smug grin he looked up at the gorgeous man, his voice coming out a little raw but happy. “Hope you didn’t have plans to put that back on.”

 

Benny laughed, his shoulders shrugging lazily, “Nah,” he grabbed the back of Samandriel’s neck and pulled him in for a short kiss, “That was amazing cher.”

 

Samandriel let himself be moved and pulled in against Benny’s strong body. He could stay like that forever, just curled up with the man.  He felt something warm swoop in his gut at Benny’s praise and he was more than a little grateful he hadn’t been a disappointment. Samandriel had once imagined the kind of lovers someone like Benny could have and to say he wasn’t a little worried about his inexperience would have been a flat out lie. It seemed that he didn’t have to worry too much though, reading Benny and his body came as naturally to him as dancing. 

 

Surging up for another small kiss ,Samandriel forced himself back to the moment. “You’re amazing… I’ve wanted to do that since the first time you kissed me, maybe longer. With everything that’s going on I needed to feel in control and you gave me that. T-thank you.”

 

“Mmm, there’s no need but I am glad I helped you feel better.  Hell I should be thanking you,” Benny grinned, pressing soft kisses all around Samandriel’s face before settling on his lips.  It was getting late but he didn’t want to leave just yet, didn’t want to go back into his bed all alone.  He especially didn’t want to leave Samandriel alone either.  It was dangerous and completely insane but he couldn’t help holding on even tighter.

 

“I wanna stay with you tonight,” he whispered.

  
“Good, I-I don’t want to be alone,” Samandriel mumbled in response, though the answer didn’t feel quite right on his tongue. It was more than not wanting to be left alone, it was not wanting to be away from Benny. His feelings were like a heavyweight in his gut waiting to be released but Benny had already mentioned taking things slow and Samandriel, despite himself, wasn’t fortunate enough to have much control of himself when it came to Benny. Still, he didn’t need to make some grand declaration or gesture when he’d agreed with the decision to hold back only a couple days before. So instead he nodded his enthusiastic agreement and kept his mouth shut. There would be more time for confessions when it felt like Benny was ready, at least he hoped so.


	9. Chapter 9

Samandriel missed the relief Benny’s arms could provide for him, in even with the simplest, most gentle touches he found comfort. Though a small, compassionate smile waited for him on Abby’s mouth, it wasn’t the same. She was great at keeping him away from prying eyes and occasionally grabby hands, but she wasn’t Benny and Samandriel couldn’t wait to get back to him. Though he did smile to himself at the memory of her arm crushing the windpipe of a guy who had gotten too close and managed to squeeze at his ass. 

 

He’d grown much more comfortable on the stage, not that he enjoyed it or anything, but it didn’t make him wretch every time he stepped off either. Samandriel almost regretted his efforts when it only seemed to make Cain more determined. He was already doing three numbers a night and Samandriel had a sinking feeling in his gut that said his uncle was about to add on another. There had been a strange man hanging around the club, almost constantly at his uncle’s side. Samandriel could practically feel the man’s eyes heavy on him at all times and he was pretty sure it was directly related to the number of performances he was being given. It was easy to see that Cain enjoyed using him as some sort of tease or bargaining chip.

 

The only thing that kept him from falling into a pit of self-loathing were the nights Benny spent in his bed, which was more often than not. They never went too far, just enjoyed the presence of one another in the darker hours where Samandriel finally felt free. 

 

Cain straightened his tie and left the upstairs lounge to make his way toward the dressing rooms.  Usually he would wait until Samandriel was completely finished for the night to speak with him but this was rather important and couldn’t wait.  Abby was waiting by the door and instantly stood once she saw him.

 

“Sir?  Is everything alright?” She asked and Cain threw on his signature charming smile.

 

“Of course Abaddon, I just need to speak with my nephew for a moment,” he said and rapped his knuckles on the door.  There was only a brief second of silence before he pushed the door open.

 

Samandriel pulled his robe tighter, feeling more uneasy without Benny there to keep him calm. He already knew what was waiting for him on the other side. His uncle with a demand for another performance. He had more than any other dancer in the club, Samandriel had been dancing for years but even short bursts of his ridiculous routines had his legs sore in new and different places every night.

 

He looked up as soon as the door opened and did his best not to flinch away when his uncle moved into the room. Samandriel felt like he should say something, but he wasn’t nearly as in control as he usual and that made it harder for him to think. 

 

“You were fantastic tonight, as always my boy,” Cain grinned, moving to lean up against the vanity that Samandriel was sitting in front of.  He never understood why the male dancers needed such things but whatever made them more content.  Samandriel merely nodded at him and Cain folded his hands in front of him and took in a deep breath.

 

“So fantastic in fact, you have caught the eye of a man I have been trying to negotiate with for years.  He wants a more...private one on one with you and has finally agreed to my price.”

 

There was a sinking feeling in his gut as Samandriel fought back the urge to heave up the acidic taste rising in his throat. He closed his eyes, taking a second to remind himself to breathe and also absently praise his decision to stay seated, he wasn’t sure he’d have been able to hold himself upright if forced to stand. He couldn’t bring himself to ask what he really wanted to know, instead going for a question he thought he could actually get out. 

 

“A p-private... _ dance _ ?” he begged, even in his own ears his voice sounded wobbly, terrified, and very foreign. 

 

“Yes, the oldest dance of them all,” Cain sneered, “As I understand from your father, you are still untouched correct?” Cain asked with a stern face.  He wanted the truth, this whole deal was riding on that fact.

 

_ There it was. _

 

Samandriel felt his chest tightening and found it nearly impossible to breathe but he couldn’t break down, not in front of his uncle. It might as well have been a death sentence. He fought back the urge to vomit and gave a quick nod, in agreement. Sure if he actually tried to respond words wouldn’t be what came out. 

 

Cain smiled brightly, squeezing Samandriel’s shoulder tightly.  He knew his nephew would come through and make him proud.

 

“That’s my boy.  We’ll close this deal completely in three days.  Have a good night nephew,” Cain said, turning on his heel to leave the dressing room before Samandriel could really say anything. 

 

Cain had made one serious mistake not taking Samandriel directly to the man, he gave him time...and with it, Benny. Wiping at the corner of his eyes Samandriel gathered his things and headed toward the door. He might sound desperate, like a child even, but he didn’t care. If Benny could be convinced to take him first, at least Samandriel would be able to have one beautiful memory, even if it was his last. 

 

* * *

 

Benny wiped his hands down the sides of his jeans as he looked around the gazebo.  He had spent too much time fluffing up the stupid pillows and rearranging the little pile of snacks he’d snuck in.  He was beyond bored and a little too anxious waiting for Samandriel to get back from that damn club and it was hard to not make a big deal out of something so simple but Samandriel was incredibly sweet.  Stuff like this came naturally to Benny and it was kind of easy to spoil the kid. 

 

Benny sighed heavily as he glanced down at his watch, it was nearing midnight and Samandriel still wasn’t back.  When Cain had informed him earlier that he wouldn’t be Samandriel’s driver it had nearly killed him.  But the errand Cain had given him helped ease the anxiety, if only just a touch.

 

When he dropped off the envelope it was to a location he had never gone before and with a guy he’d never met.  The car though, now that was familiar.  It belonged to the Serphant family and it coincided with the same information he learned from Victor’s overly cryptic phone call.  The chain of power in the lower families were shifting and one in particular was getting closer to Cain.  There was a rumor going around that soon he would be Cain’s newest “favorite”.  And that meant more power and real estate increases for both Cain and the Serphant family.  

 

If Benny had to be honest it was a strange move but it wasn’t his job to really understand, it was his job to bring down these damn families and free Cas...and Samandriel...and Dean.  Benny dropped his head in his hands and counted to ten.

 

“You’re Cormier...not Lafitte.  Cormier...Cormier,” Benny chanted, his head popping up when he heard some rustling.

 

Samandriel walked with determination, his head held high but once he caught sight of Benny everything inside of him broke. He’d wanted to be strong, wanted to approach this calmly and rationally, but nothing seemed to be working the way he’d planned. The flickering lights skirted over the pale blue of Benny’s eyes and the wide smile dropped off his face immediately. Samandriel crumbled before he even made it inside the gazebo, his legs going weak under the weight of his future. It all happened so fast, his still partially exposed ass hitting the cold grass with a thump. If not for Benny’s quick reflexes, Samandriel was sure his head would have made contact with the ground as well. 

 

Benny didn’t even realize he had moved until he was hugging Samandriel tight to his chest.  The guy was shaking almost violently against him and he lifted him up in his arms easily.  As quickly and gently as he could he got the blankets over Samandriel’s bare legs.  He tried to ignore the fact that his little boyfriend didn’t even change into something a bit warmer before meeting him, the question was right there on the edge of his tongue but when Samandriel mewled, it disappeared.

 

“Hey, hey, what happened?  Did someone hurt you?  Why didn’t Abby protect you?” Benny growled out as he hugged Samandriel close.  

 

He hadn’t meant for it to, but a hollow laugh left his throat.  _ If only, if only his problems were that simple. _ He could deal with a grabby hand from time to time, Benny had a way of wiping away all the unconsented touches, but somehow, Samandriel didn’t think he’d be able to erase something like this. It was still difficult to find his voice, he felt like he was drowning under it all and for the first time since they’d met, Samandriel wondered if even Benny would be able to keep him afloat.

 

“Cher? Hey, talk to me please?  What happened?” Benny asked, his voice slightly taking a tone of panic.  Samandriel was making this weird noise that almost sounded like a laugh but he wasn’t even really looking at Benny now.  

 

“Sweetheart?  C’mon,” he touched the side of Samandriel’s face, his thumb grazing along his cheekbone.

 

The comforting scent of Benny and the genuine concern on his face had Samandriel speaking even though he wasn’t sure the words would actually come out when he opened his mouth. A bitter tang on his tongue as they fell between his lips. Samandriel almost hated himself for telling Benny, anticipating the looks of disgust or maybe worse, pity. He knew though, that he couldn’t keep it from the man. “Apparently, I’ve been upgraded from  _ dancer _ to prostitute.” 

 

Benny blinked a few times, trying to gauge if Samandriel was fucking with him or not.  The tears brimming in the younger boy’s eyes completely squashed that very small hope and he felt his chest squeeze so tight he didn’t know if he was gonna throw up or pass out.

 

“W-What do you mean?  How could Cain even be remotely okay with this?” Benny spat out, anger flaring up through the confusion.

 

Samandriel started to curl in on himself, gathering what little strength he had left to bristle against the righteous fury Benny was clearly feeling. “I’ve always been a bargaining chip, I just…I didn’t know.”

 

“Fuck…” Benny let out a long breath and tried to tip Samandriel’s face up but he kept curling even tighter into himself.  Benny was patient though, tracing at Samandriel’s face, pressing soft kisses along his skin until he could finally see those blue eyes again. They were so scared it made Benny’s chest hurt but he took that moment to kiss at Samandriel’s lips.

 

“I don’t-I don’t know how or when but I swear, I will get you out of whatever the fuck Cain is planning for you.  I know it’s not much but I promise I will get you out of this,” Benny said vehemently.

 

“I don’t want to risk it...I-I need you to-,” he sighed in frustration, Samandriel tried to say what he meant without saying it. Unsure if he could actually get the words out. He leaned further into the man’s space, taking in the comforting scent. “Benny, please…” 

 

Benny swallowed hard as he moved his arm from being draped over Samandriel's waist to underneath the blanket.  A small tremor went through his body as Benny’s hand never stopped moving until he was touching at bare skin under that flimsy shirt Samandriel was still wearing.  Whatever nerves or panic that were running through Samandriel seemed to melt away as his eyes fluttered shut.

 

“What do you want cher?” Benny asked, brushing his lips against Samandriel’s parted ones, slowly pulling him in even closer.

 

“I wan-, n-need you to take it, m-my..I haven't ever…” Samandriel stumbled over his words, fear and panic rolling in his gut at the mere thought of Benny rejecting him. It didn't seem like Benny was disgusted by him despite how revolting and unworthy he felt. 

 

Without saying another word Benny surged forward and kissed Samandriel deeply, silently promising that he would take care of him.  He absolutely hated that  _ this _ was the reason for their first time but he understood Samandriel’s panic.  Benny didn't want any kind of scum bag to touch his boyfriend but if he could make it good, at least Samandriel would have a place to escape to in his mind.  He nearly pulled away but be refused, this wasn't about him, this was about the boy trembling in his arms.  And he was fucking determined to make him shake for a whole different reason.

 

“I'll take care of you cher,” he whispered against Samandriel's now wet lips and gently moved to hover over him.

 

Samandriel reached out draping his arms over Benny’s neck, clinging to him like a lifeline. The kiss didn’t pull him out of his thoughts entirely, but it did give him the reassurance that he needed. Grateful that he wouldn’t be sent away or rejected, Samandriel pushed back into the kiss. Pouring himself out through panted breaths and aching moans as his hands clutched at any part of Benny they could reach. 

 

Benny reached lower with his other hand, gently pulling at one of Samandriel’s legs until he understood exactly what Benny wanted.  Soon his knees were hugging at his hips and he was able to settle his weight on top of Samandriel.  For a split second he thought he’d be too heavy but Samandriel seemed eager, almost desperate for him to get that much closer.  

 

They kissed for a long time, Benny getting those wonderful noises of need instead of panic to rise out of Samandriel’s throat.  By the time he slowly backed away, Samandriel was calmer though the urgency was still there.  It eased something ugly in Benny’s chest, it was obvious that Samandriel was scared but he still  _ wanted _ Benny.  

 

Benny kept their eyes glued together as he first pulled off Samandriel’s thin shirt then his own, dropping them to the ground.  Thin deft fingers traced at his bare arms, chest and tickled down his stomach, that had Benny holding back a laugh.  He wasn’t exactly ticklish but Samandriel seemed to find those little spots that made him squirm.

 

Lying with Benny felt right, when everything that seemed to surround him felt wrong. His future was a constant pressure that overwhelmed him, but Benny made it all better. He made it feel like there was something to fight for and for that Samandriel would always be grateful. Part of him was sure that he’d have never made it this far without the gorgeous man above him. 

 

Feeling more at ease than he’d been since it started, Samandriel pulled his voice again. There were some things Benny should know, needed to know. “I wanted you, I mean before… everything. I wanted to be with you, like this. You said we should take things slower, but...I was always ready for you.”

 

Benny chuckled softly, “I did too cher,” he said before kissing him again but this time with a little more hunger than before.  He licked at the seam of Samandriel’s lips until they parted with a gasp.  Benny moaned, devouring the taste of Samandriel’s tongue as his hands started to roam all over his lithe body.  Those sinewy muscles rippling under his hands.  He was gorgeous and when they had more time, Benny promised himself that he would worship every inch of his body.  Now though, he dragged the hand not currently cupping Samandriel’s face up the outside of his thigh and traced along the edge of his skimpy shorts.

 

“You ready?” Benny asked softly.

 

“Yes... Benny please,” Samandriel answered, pulling his hips impatiently off the pillowed surface. When the barely cool breeze snaked across his exposed skin, Samandriel felt a thrill of pleasure twisting through him. Benny’s warm hands and thick fingers caressing him with such adoration and awe left him overwhelmed in the best way. He helped to wiggle the last of his  _ costume _ over his hips and then quickly pulled Benny back down for a kiss. 

 

Benny allowed Samandriel to control the kiss for a few minutes before gently pushing him down against the pillows.  When he tried to get back at his lips Benny chuckled and leaned back on his knees.  He gave the younger boy a playful look as he started to undo his jeans, slowly pulling the zipper down.

 

“Ah, ah, ah, you tease me all the time cher, my turn,” Benny smirked slapping Samandriel’s greedy hands away.  He raised up to his feet and pushed down his pants, leaving him in just his tight boxer briefs.  He toyed with the band of his underwear, pulling them away from his skin and letting them snap back.  Samandriel’s hungry eyes never once wavering where his hands were.  

 

“Roll over sweetheart,” Benny said, his skin growing a bit hot with how intense Samandriel’s stare was, his cock already throbbing for attention.

 

Quickly obeying the order Samandriel flipped himself over, only marginally disgruntled that he was being robbed of the clear sight of Benny’s perfect form. He let out a shaky breath and tried to relax, even though his anxious nerves and excitement both began to rev up inside him. He’d never so much as experimented on himself but he trusted Benny and knew that no matter what, the man would never intentionally hurt him. 

 

Benny shuddered hard at the sight before him.  If Benny ever had a preference on the perfect body, Samandriel definitely destroyed it and rewrote it to fit him to a tee.  Benny quickly knelt between his parted legs and instantly palmed at Samandriel’s ass, squeezing and kneading each cheek with his fingers until he got a long whimper out of the kid.  

 

“You are absolutely beautiful Samandriel,” Benny growled out, slowly parting his cheeks to reveal the dusty pink hole already fluttering from the sudden air brushing against it.  

 

Samandriel had never felt more vulnerable or safe, it was by far one of the weirdest contradictions he’d ever faced but he didn’t regret a single second of it. Soon he’d belong to Benny and if nothing else, that would get him through the night. He whined a little at the cool soothing pleasure that rolled through him with his ass spread and open to the wind. Benny’s hands felt thick and warm on his cheeks and it made him eager to find out what came next. “Mmm, more.”

 

Benny grinned and dragged his thumb right over that hole, loving how it fluttered even more when he pressed the pad of his finger right against it.  He would never do this dry, it would be too painful for Samandriel and the thought of him being in any kind of pain had some dark rage swelling through Benny’s chest.  He knew they didn’t have any lube or any kind of supplies for that matter but he would make this good for Samandriel.  

 

“Just relax sweetheart, this may feel weird at first,” Benny said, gently pushing at Samandriel’s upper back until his chest was pressed down on the pillows and his ass high in the air.  He looked delicious just like this and Benny had to squeeze the base of his dick to get himself under control.

 

He touched Samandriel everywhere, making sure there wasn’t even an inch of skin he hadn't caressed before brushing his lips over the top of each ass cheek.  Samandriel was moaning softly, his fingers just barely gripping at the blankets and Benny grinned even wider, knowing the grip would become almost desperate soon.  He spread Samandriel’s cheeks again and dragged a very slow line from Samandriel’s balls and right over his hole with his tongue.

 

“Ohhh, God. Benny.” The wet slide of Benny’s smooth tongue was actually a surprise, it left a damp trail that the breeze turned into electric pleasure. Samandriel couldn’t stop the whine that escaped his throat, or the moan that quickly came after. His head dropped low, but he held his position. He squirmed a little impatiently,  practically begging for more. 

 

“So good for me cher,” Benny groaned, repeating the act only twice more before paying more attention on his hole.  He teased at it, loving how responsive Samandriel was to every touch Benny offered to him.  Benny had to hold onto the kid’s hips to keep him still, every time he withdrew Samandriel would push back for more.  

 

By the time Benny began to slowly slide his tongue inside, Samandriel was a writhing mess, his forehead pressed against the pillows as he whined and mewled at him.  Benny had him spread wide and he was no longer teasing him.

Samandriel clutched helplessly at the silky sheets, arching his back as the pleasure flooded him. He was hard and leaking, a gust of wind smacking against the wet tip of his cock making it almost unbearable to keep steady. “B-Benny, p-please,’ he begged, keening as he shoved himself back needing more of everything. More of Benny’s warm hands, the way his soft pointed tongue was sliding inside him, and something else he couldn’t even name.

 

“Shhh, I got you sweetheart.  I gotta make sure you’re nice and wet for me,” Benny cooed, kissing the cleft of Samandriel’s ass before going back to his mission at hand.  He plunged his tongue back into that tight heat and moaned into it, wiggling his tongue all around.  Samandriel clenched around him and it only made him more eager to drive Samandriel wild.  Benny pulled away only enough to suck on his finger, getting it slick to start tracing at his rim as his tongue tried to get as deep as it could.

 

It was too much and not enough, his body was screaming out for more but he knew that Benny had good reasons for drawing it out. He whimpered and whined as the sensations racked his body and he naturally began to rock back and forth searching for more. Samandriel could feel the trembling in his thighs, he wasn’t sure he’d be able to hold himself up much longer. Benny’s tongue felt too good and there was something harder there, pushing into him, and it still wasn’t enough. “I-can’t...I need, Benny…”

 

“What do you need cher?” Benny asked, gently pushing his finger into the second knuckle.  Whatever words that had been on Samandriel’s tongue were forgotten in favor of moaning.  Benny grinned and rubbed at the boy’s lower back as he started to slowly thrust his finger in and out of his quivering body.  He loathed the idea of pulling his finger out but he needed to get his other fingers wet as well.  Biting his lip he leaned in close and spit onto them, using his thumb to spread his saliva around his middle finger.  On Samandriel’s next exhale he pushed both fingers in but kept it shallow.

 

There were no words to describe the feeling of Benny’s thick fingers inside him. He’d imagined it would be painful, and there was a bit of pressure but nothing that was actually tinged with pain or sting even. It was all soft and sweet, just like the gorgeous man behind him. Samandriel was a mess of noises he wasn’t trying to make as he pushed against Benny’s steadying arm to try to rock back with more force. Unfortunately the man just chuckled and kept him in place. 

 

He felt a coil snapping tight in his gut but when he searched for friction, it was never enough. Samandriel wasn’t sure he’d be able to hold himself up if he actually moved one arm down to tug on his aching cock, but it was almost worth the try anyway. He needed release, couldn’t hold out much longer, not like this.

 

Benny caught some movement and looked closer to see Samandriel stroking himself.  He was so tempted to make him stop but he also loved the idea that he was desperate for some kind of release.  Deciding to help the guy out, Benny eased both fingers in all the way and began to scissor him open.  He was also looking for something and when he finally found it it was a lightning bolt shot through Samandriel.  At first Benny thought he hurt him but he was crying out in pleasure, his body jerking back hard against his hand.  

 

“C’mon cher, fuck yourself on my fingers, show me how much you love feeling me inside of you,” Benny growled out as he crooked his fingers so that each time Samandriel’s hips rolled back he was dragged his prostate against them.

 

He could barely hear Benny or register what the man was actually saying, ecstasy flooding through his veins with every press of fingers inside him. Samandriel was so close to losing it that he was nearly in tears. He was struggling to breathe, calling out Benny’s name with every tiny breath as his hand jerked wildly up and down his shaft.

 

Finally his knees buckled under the weight of the orgasm that rocked through him but Benny’s reflexes were fast and he held him up as the waves of pleasure spun out of him along with hot white spurts of cum dripping down onto the soft sheets beneath them. 

 

“So good cher, so good for me,” Benny cooed, kissing at Samandriel’s shoulder as he helped shuffle them over to a drier spot.  His little boyfriend was limp like a noodle and Benny just laughed, flipping him over onto his back so he could look at that blissed out face.

 

“Fuck you look so good like this,” Benny groaned, licking up a spot of cum on his stomach.

 

Everything was a bit hazy for a few seconds, but one thing that kept him grounded was the heat from Benny’s hands against his skin. When he felt Benny moving higher, Samandriel reached out, clutching limply at the short strands of hair. He felt amazing and could barely bring himself to think but he also wanted to feel the weight of Benny against him and the press of soft sweet lips on his own. 

 

Benny kissed him deeply, rolling his tongue along Samandriel’s before sucking the other into his mouth.  He got his fingers back inside Samandriel, starting up the scissoring again.  Samandriel was so tight he needed to get him stretched open on at least three of his fingers before he even thought of getting his dick inside.  

 

“You wanna keep goin?”  It was more of a rhetorical question, he knew that this was happening tonight no matter what.  Samandriel was determined to lose his virginity to Benny before that scum bag took it from him.  Before he could get too angry about it, Benny took in a deep breath and tapped his fingers at Samandriel’s swollen lips as he waited for an answer.

 

His voice was a little raspy from breathing heavily and panting out Benny’s name, but Samandriel struggled to speak anyway. He needed Benny to know, to understand that he wanted this regardless of the situation. “Y-yes, I, I want you inside me...feels so good, so full...need more.”

 

Benny nodded and quirked up a brow, tapping at Samandriel’s lips again until they parted.  Once he got the idea Samandriel sucked on his fingers like it was his cock and once again, had to squeeze at the base to keep from blowing.  It didn’t take long to get his fingers sloppy wet and he pushed the first two in, thrusting them a few times before pushing in the third.  Samandriel gasped, his brows furrowing a bit but Benny surged forward, catching his lips in a deep kiss to keep his mind off of the uncomfortable dull ache he must be feeling.

 

The hardness inside him was thicker and there was a more noticeable pressure, but Samandriel didn’t care. It wasn’t actually painful just...different. Benny’s mouth was the perfect distraction. He got lost in the soft slide of tongue on tongue and moaned when the man pulled back to nip and suck against his lips. Benny’s rough beard scraped against his chin but Samandriel craved more of the friction. He looked at Benny with wide eyes and a hopeful expression, before turning his head and exposing his throat. “P-please.”

 

“Cher,” Benny shuddered hard.  He didn’t mean to but he couldn’t help massaging a bit hard on Samandriel’s prostate and only stopped when a broken noise fell out of his boyfriend's mouth.  He stopped immediately and kissed at Samandriel’s lips in an apology as he eased lower.  He nibbled his way from the inside of Samandriel’s knee to suck on the most inner part of his thigh.  Looking up at Samandriel and making sure his eyes were clear, he smiled before biting down and sucking at the skin hard.  

 

Samandriel whimpered and drew Benny’s name out in a long whine as the man made his mark. He understood why it was on a more private area of his body, but it didn’t take away the longing he had to be more visibly marked. Although Samandriel knew that it was best for both of them that his uncle couldn’t see the evidence of his lost virtue. Samandriel clutched at Benny’s hair tugging on it hard as he squirmed under the delicious thrill of excitement rolling through him.

 

“Again,” he shuddered, directing Benny’s head to his other thigh waiting for the harsh sting of his bite and the raw pleasure that flooded him.alongside it. 

 

Benny sucked on the patch of skin, getting it nice and sensitive before biting down.  He loved the noises Samandriel was making and the way his legs squeezed around his head.  When he pulled back a little he was proud to see Samandriel was growing hard again and kissed at each of the dark bruises before crawling up to hover over him.

 

“You have enough energy to get me wet with your mouth?” Benny asked wiggling his eyebrows.  He rolled his hips forward, dragging their erections against each other as Samandriel’s mouth dropped open in a moan.

 

“Y-yes,” He wanted to say more but the mere thought of wrapping his mouth around Benny’s cock had him trying to squirm down the mattress. Of course that just drew out a laugh from the man, who them rolled over onto his back, pulling Samandriel with him. He let Benny tug him in for one more kiss before sliding down his body. Unlike his rushed attempt in the car, Samandriel wanted to remember this, to have it etched into his memory like a familiar song. He dragged his tongue across the small brown nub on the left side of Benny’s chest, smiling when it drew out a low growl. 

 

Benny scraped his fingers through Samandriel’s hair and tugged on it a bit but not enough to direct or stop him.  He had to count to ten and dig his other set of fingers into the blanket when Samandriel finally started to kiss his way even lower.  He was so eager to feel those lips wrapped around him again but he was more so to get slick enough to slip inside his boyfriend for the first time.

 

“Fuck cher,” Benny groaned.

 

Samandriel dipped lower, his teeth nipping at the soft flesh of Benny’s stomach but he didn’t hover long. He could see the impatience growing in Benny’s eyes, even his own desires were pushing him to move faster. He took the thick pulsing shaft into his hand and squeezed it before spitting over the tip. The grunt that earned him was nice but he didn’t get what he wanted until his lips wrapped around the slicked up head and sucked over it’s warm thickness. Samandriel hummed around the head and hollowed out his jaws to suck it in a bit harder. 

 

“Oh Fuck,” Benny groaned as his head fell back, trying to not relax too much into it.  He did not want to cum like this, he wanted to be buried deep inside Samandriel, marking him from the inside.  Samandriel licked and sucked at every inch of him and just as Benny’s gut started to clench he tugged on Samandriel’s hair.

 

“Shit you gotta stop or I’m gonna cum,” Benny panted.  He didn’t let Samandriel have a moment to even think about it before he was crowding his smaller body against the pillows again.

 

“How do you want this?” Benny asked, sucking hard on a sensitive patch of skin on his neck though he was careful to not leave a lasting mark.

 

“I want to see you,” he answered without hesitation. Samandriel didn’t care about anything other than that, but he didn’t want to be facing away from Benny. He couldn’t imagine what it would be like to feel the man’s heavy cock inside him and be completely unable to see those gorgeous blue eyes or the way Benny’s mouth dropped open when he felt pleasure. No, Samandriel wanted to witness everything, lock it into his mind for as long as possible. 

 

“Okay, you tell me if it hurts,” Benny said sternly, not moving until he got a exasperated nod.  He kissed Samandriel slow, rolling their tongues sensually as he got a pillow underneath Samandriel’s hips.  

 

One hand helped guide the tip of his cock to Samandriel’s hole while the other pressed their hands into the mattress.  He waited for Samandriel’s breathing to relax before slowly pushing in, stopping at any time he mewled or clenched too tightly.  

 

“Relax cher,” Benny cooed, taking up Samandriel’s other hand to press them both over his head.  Samandriel clung on to him and he finally opened up, relaxing enough to let Benny push all the way in until their hips were flush together.

 

It was so different than he expected, something in his chest seemed to click. He felt so full and satisfied even though his cock was still hard and beginning to leak onto his stomach. Benny’s grip on his hands kept him anchored to the moment but it still felt like he was freefalling. There was a blissful combination of pleasure and only a small tinge of pain as the man pulled out and slid back inside him. 

 

He didn’t even realize he was doing anything until Benny kissed at his lips, smiled, and told him he might want to be a little quieter if he didn’t want to bring around the whole neighborhood. It was then he noticed how raw his throat was and his ears took in the echoed moans of Benny’s name. 

 

“Feel good cher?” Benny grinned, his body jerking when Samandriel clenched tight around him, “Ungh, you brat.” He gave Samandriel a very pointed thrust and took way too much pleasure at the sinful whine it caused.  It wasn’t a painful one it was filled with pleasure and need, Benny had a very small argument with himself whether he should do it again.  He settled for keeping them slow but just on the edge of rough.

 

Samandriel saw stars with nearly every thrust. He’d assumed it would be nice, sweet, just like Benny. Samandriel even expected it to feel good because Benny would make sure it did, but he'd never imagined anything like this. He was filled with an unbelievable pleasure thrumming throughout his entire body, in a way that seemed so impossible he feared he'd never recreate it in his mind. 

 

He was so close but he wanted Benny to cum first this time. “Benny, p-please...fill me up,” Samandriel whined, swallowing hard as he canted his hips up to meet the man's sinful thrust.

 

“Fuck cher you feel so good,” Benny groaned.  It was all becoming too overwhelming for him with how tight and hot Samandriel was and not to mention all the noises the kid was making.  Benny gritted his teeth, wanting it to last just a bit longer.

 

His entire composure broke when Samandriel all but sobbed his name, breaking some bond that held Benny together.  He became almost ruthless with how hard he was thrusting into Samandriel.

 

“You want me to cum sweetheart?  Let you feel what exactly you do to me?” Benny growled into Samandriel's ear.  He didn't get much of a response just more of those delicious whines.

 

“Gonna mark you from the inside cher, make you mine from the inside out,” Benny grunted, his next coming out as a shout as Samandriel squeezed around him like a vice.  He managed to sink into him one more time before he came.  This time it was his turn to cling onto Samandriel.

 

Samandriel loved the way Benny curled around him as the force of his pleasure spilled inside him. This was what he’d been searching for, the feeling of being full of Benny and having the man fall apart in his arms was better than he could have ever thought. Without so much as a brush against his own erection, Samandriel found himself ready to release. All it took was Benny’s comforting weight on him and the satisfaction of being so full to have him painting his own stomach with heated white strands. 

 

Benny finally managed to pull his head out of Samandriel’s shoulder and lazily kiss all over his face, laughing when limp hands tried to playfully bat him away.  He finally settled on Samandriel’s lips and both of them moaned at the contact.  He was still buried to the hilt inside of Samandriel and it felt too good to even begin to leave him.  Especially not when his boyfriend wrapped around him, obviously wanting him to stay put.

 

“You okay?” Benny asked softly, nuzzling his face against Samandriel’s cheek.

 

“Mmm, perfect,” Samandriel answered, his voice raspy with use and weak with pleasure. His mind was overwhelmed but he knew that he’d never been more happy, so he savored it. Trying to hide just how terrified he was that it would be the last time he felt this way. He hugged Benny closer, wrapping around him as much like an octopus as he could, regretting the moment that the man softened so much that he would slide out and leave him empty again. 

 

Benny hated it but they had to start moving, it was getting late and soon the rounds were going to change.  He had to get Samandriel inside before the gardners got there anyway.  As gently as he could he slipped out of Samandriel with a grunt and reached for a napkin.  Of all the supplies he brought, he had not been prepared for this.  He chuckled a little as he cleaned them both up.

 

“I’ll make sure to carry lube around with me now,” Benny teased, kissing at Samandriel’s pouted lips.

 

Something in Samandriel clenched at the idea that it wasn’t just a one time thing, that maybe Benny wasn’t done with him. He didn’t get his hopes up that it would last beyond what his uncle had planned for him, afterall no matter how gentle and kind Benny had been, Samandriel doubted anyone would want to stay with someone who was being used by other men and something told him that his uncle wouldn’t stop at one.  _ Still _ , it seemed he had a day or two at least to enjoy Benny and Samandriel wanted nothing more. 

 

“Yes please,” he answered with a small smile, fighting back all the awkward and bad thoughts he had was easy when he felt so blissed out from release, Benny, and the comforting knowledge that no matter what his uncle believed, he couldn’t bargain this away from Samandriel.

 

He was loose limbed, but he fought his way to sit up and then smiled brightly over at the pile of his favorite snacks that Benny must have grabbed before everything started. After plucking out a bag of cheetos, Samandriel giggled and began chomping into them. Stopping to say a quick “Thank you,” that seemed to turn into much more. 

 

Benny grinned and pecked at his cheek, “You’re more than welcome.  We can sneak this back inside and I’ll have a few hours to snuggle with ya before I gotta get goin,” Benny sighed heavily.  He so did not want to go back to his apartment but he had too.  There were too many eyes and ears around him during the day and he had to call Vic’s contact.  Things were moving around and they had to be ready.    

  
He dug his thumb into his eye for a second before plopping down next to Samandriel and stole a cheeto, “We got a few minutes though,” he grinned.


	10. Chapter 10

Benny couldn’t help yawn, he was beyond exhausted and really could use a nap.  The mere thought of snuggling up to Samandriel and sleeping sounded so amazing he was damn near pouting that he couldn't, not for another several hours at least.  The second he had walked in through the front door, Cain was on him, requesting his service to take him up to one of his warehouses.  So that’s where he was, sitting outside in the stuffy town car waiting for Cain to be finished.  

 

It was pissing him off that Cain never let him inside with him but then again, Cain never allowed anyone with him unless it was his wife.  It was a smart but infuriating move on his boss’s part.  

 

He jumped, hitting his knee on the steering wheel when his phone went off in his pocket.  Before fishing it out he looked around, making sure no other curious eyes were on the car.  All the message contained was several exclamation marks from an unknown number.  Something Vic used to do when all this shit started to go down.  He was about to answer when a steady knock thudded against his window.

 

“Yeah?” 

 

“You Cormier? Cain’s driver?” the guy leaned down and Benny recognized him from the front gates.

 

“What of it?” he called out.

 

“Cain sent word to drive around back, he’s got somethin for you to load up,” the guy said, patted the hood of the car and drove off.  Benny swallowed hard and eased the car toward the back of the warehouse.

  
  


“You cannot be serious, first the strip show and now this?  How can you do this to him!” Amara shouted.  Cain had his back to her, like he always did and he slowly turned to level her with a glare.  Usually she would cower away but not this time.  There was so much she turned a blind eye on but this was her nephew.  She couldn’t allow him to be used this way.

 

“Amara, he’s family, I get that.  But as family, he will do what this family needs.  And right now, I need him to seal this deal with the Serphant family.  The moment he has completed this task, we will be unstoppable, why can’t you see that Amara?” Cain asked with an incredulous laugh.  

 

“Because he isn’t some bargaining chip!”

 

“Oh now that’s where you’re wrong, dear.  The second he took my offer he became just that and I will use him how I see fit.  I mean, I  _ am _ going to be paying for every single school expense he’ll ever have,” Cain smirked.  Amara didn’t know what she was doing until her hand was flying out and connecting with Cain’s face.  Her nails did an amazing job drawing blood but that satisfaction only lasted a second before he retaliated.  But it wasn’t an open hand like usual and she found herself crumpling to the ground in a heap.

 

“You son of a bitch,” she spat, wiping the blood from her lip.  Cain opened his mouth to speak when the door slowly pushed opened and revealed Benny, Cain’s latest goon.  Though, he wasn’t like the others and seemed incredibly sweet.  Especially around her nephew.  She wasn’t the only one who had seen a friendship blooming between the two of them and if she was being honest, she was hoping there was more going on.  

 

She caught the man’s eyes and they widened when they took in her appearance.  He made an aborted movement toward her but seemed to remember himself and stood still.  Something churned in her stomach, something she was missing entirely as she stared at this man.  He was practically itching to move and help her up and no one, not even the ones trying to impress her had ever tempted to incur Cain’s wrath to do so.

 

“Ah!  Benny, so sorry, just having a little disagreement,” Cain said dismissively.  Amara cursed under her breath and flinched when Cain’s hand suddenly appeared in front of her face.

 

“Sweetheart, please,” Cain said, gripping her fingers a little tightly as if in warning as he helped her up to her feet.

 

“Y-You um, you wanted to load the car with something?” Benny stammered, clearing his throat and managed to stand up a bit straighter.

 

“Yes, yes.  You see, I have some trash that needs to be taken out and this is a new errand for you.  Just wanted to be a good boss and make sure you were trained correctly.  Come!” Cain said waving his hand for them to follow.  Amara took a tissue from her pocket and quickly wiped at her face as she moved to catch up with her husband.  She nearly staggered when the door opened and inside was what used to be a man.  He had been beaten so badly his face was no longer recognizable.

 

“What the f-” Benny gasped.

 

“Oh, don’t fret about this one.  He was just a lackey who thought it was okay to lie to me.  You see, I treasure honesty from those who I employ.  If I don’t have their honesty what do they have to even offer to me?  Hm?  He was trying to tell me that he saw with his own two eyes my sweet innocent nephew sneaking into the garden last night and that he stayed there till morning.  Now, Alfieis a good boy who does exactly what he’s told so you see my confusion as why this, lowlife would tell me such lies about him,” Cain explained.  

 

Amara felt stunned, frozen to the ground as she stared at the mess of man sitting in a chair.  She didn’t understand why Cain would go to this level of violence unless there was something much deeper going on.  She quickly glanced up at Benny and realization slammed into her like a battering ram.  His eyes were wide and sweat was beginning to build up on his brow.  He wouldn’t be able to lie to save even his own life right now.

 

“Dear...you know how terrified Samandriel is of the garden.  You remember how he got lost as a child?” Amara asked sweetly.  It was a tone she always used to pacify him and she was praying it would work now.  He turned those cruel eyes to her and she watched as they softened, the man she had fallen in love returning even if it was for a split second.

 

“Hmmm, yes.  I do recall that little incident,” Cain said with a half smile.

 

“Then why would he venture inside now?  You did a wonderful job teaching that one a lesson.  To think, him spreading such disgusting falsehoods about Samandriel,” Amara sighed, her usual cool armor sliding around her like protective blanket.  Cain nodded, some heat returning in those eyes and Amara forced herself to grin at him.  She needed to get Cain away from Benny before he did something stupid.

 

“Come now, we still need to see the docks and I feel like we need some fresh air and ice cream.  Walk with me like old times?  Benny can take care of this,” she said, gesturing absently to the unconscious man.

 

“As you wish my love,” Cain sighed, taking up her hand and kissing her fingers gently.  Amara played the shy bit and Cain fell for it, leading her toward the door.  She caught Benny’s eyes and gave him a pleading look, mouthing the words “help him” before she was pulled out of his sight.

 

* * *

 

Benny fell to his knees the second they left, his breathing becoming too fast and ragged.  Fuck, Cain knew.  How could he have been so fucking stupid and put Samandriel at risk like that!  All he’d done was to give his boyfriend exactly what he wanted, something to cling to when he was forced to be with that piece of shit.

 

And Amara, she knew too.  Maybe even more than Cain did and he honestly didn’t know what was worse at this point.  Even if she had practically begged him to help Samandriel, what if she changed her mind and threw Samandriel under a bus to save her own skin?

 

He needed help and he didn’t know who he could even turn to.  All the evidence he had was substantial at best and if he tried anything at this point, then he’d be on the run forever.  It would do nothing to help any of the people he cared about.  They’d just be on the receiving end of Cain’s retribution.  

 

The man groaned next to him and he winced.  He had to take care of this guy and he couldn’t risk Cain finding him and questioning him again.  With shaking hands he pulled out his phone and called the hospital in Hyannis.

 

“Becky?  Hey, I need a huge favor…”

 

Three hours later Benny dropped his head in his hands as the monitors next to him beeped steadily.  The face of his best friend was stubbly and it was eating away at Benny to know that someone was lacking in his care.  Becky had informed him that Mary was out sick and without her, no one at the hospital really did anything for Dean unless it was to change his bedpan or fluids.

 

“When you wake up man, I’m gonna give you the gloves and you can have your go at me.  I don’t know why I thought I could ever do this without ya, you were the brains and I always was too fucking soft.  I’m going to fail again brother and I don’t know if I’ll be able to survive this one,” Benny sighed heavily and took up Dean’s hand, his thumb rubbing over the slightly tarnished engagement ring Castiel had demanded he wore.  

 

Whatever it was, the connection with his friend or the reminder that Castiel was still in that hell, a new kind of strength pushed through him and he was able to bury all the misery back down into the pit of his stomach.

 

“I can do this, I can take them all fucking down.  I’m gonna get Cas outta there and save Samandriel from this shit.  I’ll bring our family back together Dean, I swear it.”

 

“Shit,” Benny hissed, his phone going off in his pocket.  He had several messages and each one of them made him swallow hard.  Especially the last one.

 

**Message from Samandriel:** _ What do you mean he knows?! _

 

**Message from Samandriel:** _ Benny please tell me what’s going on! _

 

**Message from Samandriel:** _ Are you coming back? _

 

**Message from Amara Angelo:** _ Benny, we need to speak immediately.  Cain is out for the evening, message me the moment you are back at the compound.  It’s extremely important you tell no one of this message. _

 

Benny took in a deep breath and quickly replied to Samandriel as he started to head out of the hospital.

 

**Message to Samandriel:** _ I’m so sorry cher, I was taking care of something.  I think your uncle knows about us. So if he asks you anything about the garden, do what you have to convince him that you're still terrified of the place.  And yes sweetheart, I’m coming back now. _

 

Benny didn’t wait to see what Samandriel would answer with, he had to get back to the compound and fast.


	11. Chapter 11

Benny entered the house and looked around.  It was quiet and dark, a nervous feeling fluttering around in his stomach as he slowly walking toward the hall.  Amara didn’t tell him where to meet but he had inkling where she might be.  Sure enough, she was waiting for him in front of the door that led to that damn room.

 

“I know who you are, Officer Benny Lafitte,” She said.  Her voice ripped through him like ice and he tried to get himself ready for anything but she merely smiled at him.

 

“I’m the least of your worries,” she said.

 

“How did you find out?” he asked.  She shook her head and opened the door, ushering him inside.  There was nothing much to the room but then again, he didn’t really even know what he’d been expecting.  A black shoulder bag sat on the desk and looked as if it had been stuffed full.

 

“You don’t play a very good thug, though my husband seems to have bought it.  You’re one mistake?  Showing how much you actually care.  I’m a horrible person but yet you wanted to help me up this afternoon.  Why?” she asked, her head tilting the side a bit.  Benny rubbed the back of his neck and sighed.  

 

“I don’t know, my momma taught me to never hurt a woman no matter how big of a bitch she’s bein,” Benny drawled.  Amara laughed softly and nodded, her arms crossing over her stomach as she moved closer to the desk.

 

“What is it exactly are you here for?  My husband’s head?  To bring down the families?  What?” she demanded.

 

“All of the above ma’am.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Because they’re all evil and my own family can’t be safe until they’re taken down,” Benny answered.  Amara nodded, hands reaching out to grip the bag on the table.

 

“And what of Samandriel?  Was this, all part of your play?” Amara spat out.  Benny felt a hot flash of anger and he took a step closer only to freeze when she pulled a gun out on him.

 

“No, he’s one of the people I want to protect . I need to save him from this bullshit Cain is doin to him,” Benny answered.  Amara’s arm wavered but the tears building up in her eyes never fell.

 

“Good.  Everything you need is in here,” she said, patting at the bulging bag before taking a step away from it and him.  Benny’s pulse was racing and for a split second he thought he might be getting set up but the look of fear on Amara’s face was too genuine.  

 

“Why are you giving this to me?” Benny asked.  

 

“Because like you said, we’re all evil and need to be taken down.  Samandriel isn’t like us, he’s too sweet.  Protect him Benny,” she whispered.  Benny swallowed at the very thick knot in his throat and nodded.  The bag was heavy and would take a while to sift through but this was it.  This was the break he was trying so hard to get.

 

“I will,” he said before snatching the bag off the table and damn near running out of the house and toward the sheds.  The guards hardly ever went out here and it was safe for him to call up Vic’s contact.

 

“I got it Jody.  All the evidence we need to bring them down.  It’ll be at the rendezvous point at 0-400,” he said a bit breathlessly.

 

“Good job kiddo.  We’ll get through it, just sit tight for a few more days okay?” she said.  Benny was already shaking his head before he could even say anything.

 

“Nonono, Jody I don't’ have a few more days.  This needs to go down tomorrow!” Benny hissed.  Tomorrow was the last day before Samandriel was going to be sold off to that piece of shit.

 

“Benny, I know you wanna get out of there but this takes time!” Jody groaned.

 

“It’s not just me!  There’s someone else here who is depending on this finishing tomorrow.  Please Jody, find something big enough to end this before tomorrow night,” Benny begged.

 

“I’ll see what I can do but I can’t promise anything kiddo.  Vic’s found out something as well, if this really is the break we need, both of the major crime families are going to go down.  Take that in Benny, you did well!” She said and then hung up.

 

“Fuck,” Benny sighed and let his head fall back against the wooden wall of the shed.  He was exhausted and really needed to sleep but he also had to get this bag to their meeting point over in Lancaster.  The sooner he got this done, the sooner they would be free.

 

**Message to Samandriel:** _ I’m sorry cher, Amara caught me and has asked me to do an errand for her.  I’ll be back in a couple hours but if you’re not too angry with me I’ll still sneak in when I come back. _

 

**Message to Benny:** _ I'm not angry, just confused...come back to me as soon as you can. There will always be space for you in my bed. _

 

Benny nodded and put the phone back.  He had to hurry.


	12. Chapter 12

Samandriel’s eyes blinked open and he searched backward for the warm comfort of Benny’s body only to feel cooling sheets behind him. Immediately the smile dropped off his face, though he was getting used to Benny’s morning disappearances. The man had to be careful, he understood that. If Cain were to have any real proof that he and Benny were spending time together, there was no telling what he might do. 

 

He rubbed at his eyes in an effort to wake himself up but immediately tensed when he felt a cool metal against his face. He jerked his hand back to see the familiar large band usually on Benny’s right hand, tucked neatly on his left. There was a small ribbon wrapped around it so that it was seated comfortably on his much smaller finger. A grin split his face open and Samandriel found himself flailing wildly against the covers that were tucked around him. It wasn’t until a particularly excited kick sent the comforter flying that he noticed the small note tucked away on his nightstand. 

 

_ Sorry I had to leave you once again but you understand why.  I know things are going to be a little harder for you today so anytime you feel alone, look at my ring.  I ain’t goin anywhere, cher.  I love you. _

 

_ Benny _

 

Samandriel touched his hand to his chest and then kissed the silver band. Nothing would be able to take away this moment of pure joy, even if he was expected to do unthinkable things later that night. Benny was there, even if he wasn’t and Samandriel felt like he could actually survive whatever was coming if he had even a piece of the man he loved with him. 

 

Samandriel excitedly moved toward the shower, humming to himself quietly as he washed away the sweat and any remaining stickiness Benny had missed the night before. His heart was full and he was bursting with warmth and love as he finished up and began to get dressed. As he lifted his hoodie over his head, there was a knock on his door. 

 

“Hello Samandriel,” Abby said with a small smile.  For some reason she’d been assigned to be Samandriel’s driver...again.  She really didn’t like being away from Amara and she knew in her gut Cain was up to something.  Especially since Benny wasn’t really doing anything at the moment.  

 

“You’re uncle asked me to take you to one of the parlors and get you pampered today,” she said.  Samandriel moved his hand to brush some hair behind his ear and she caught sight of the ring on his finger.

 

“Uh..okayyy,” Samandriel replied, skeptically lowering his eyebrows. It was probably some sort of bribe to keep him from saying anything or rebelling against is plans, though he’d already disobeyed in a very dramatic way. The memory made him smile and he found himself nodding agreeably. “Sure, I’m ready just one second.”

 

Samandriel rushed back toward the bathroom and grabbed up his phone where he’d  left it after texting Benny a sweet thank you and good morning. He smiled back toward where Abbadon was staring at him with a concerned look on her face. “What’s wrong?”

 

Abby sighed and took off one of her silver chains she had on around her neck and handed it to Samandriel with a knowing smile, “You might wanna wear that somewhere less noticeable,” she said eyeing the ring on his finger.  She watched as the color drained from his face but she merely shook her head and pulled at another chain, this one had a ring on it as well.  One that Amara had given her after their third time together.  

 

“Th-I haven’t seen that in a very long time,” Samandriel said without thinking. It had been years ago that his aunt had lost his mother’s ring. Once she’d passed, his father hadn’t been able to keep it, too weighed down by the memory and not long after he’d given it to his sister. Samandriel remembered seeing the white gold knots wrapping around his aunt’s finger just after he’d turned twelve. She’d claimed to have lost it soon after though. Now that he actually thought about it, his father didn’t seem all that upset by it. 

 

“Oh,” he said, his eyes widening when the realization hit him. He offered her a small smile and quickly tucked Benny’s ring onto the silver chain and dropped it beneath his shirt, the circle warm and friendly against his chest.

 

Abby smiled and tucked her own under her shirt and waited patiently for Samandriel to finish.  Once he was ready she guided him through the house to the garage.  On their way though, they came across Benny standing in the foyer and Abby had to gently push Samandriel forward.  None of them could risk an accidental slip up.  Benny looked a little crushed but she was sure he’d understand the brush off.

 

Samandriel was disappointed he wouldn’t get to say goodbye to Benny, but he understood Abby’s insistence. Still, he touched at his chest, feeling the ring push against the skin beneath his shirt and hoodie. He was herded toward the car where he mostly just tried to remember what it was like to spend the night with Benny, the way he’d felt after finding the ring, and even allowed a few of the fantasies he’d dreamed up play out in his mind. It was a good way to pass the time.

 

Once they got to the “ _ wellness center”  _ Samandriel tucked those feelings away. If anyone outside of Benny, Abby, or his aunt caught sight of him being so giddy, it would undoubtedly get back to Cain and he’d be tipped off even sooner. No, he had to bury it down and hold it tightly against his chest like the warm silver band. 

 

He went through the motions of pampering and answered any questions they gave him but he never tried to talk to anyone outside of that, not even polite small talk or pleasantries he’d been taught to hand out when he was younger. Instead he pulled out the small book from the middle pocket of his sweatshirt and began to pluck at the pages whenever his hands weren’t busy. Though everything came to a halt when Abby’s phone knocked him out of his concentration and she answered with a frown that he knew wasn’t meant for his aunt.

 

“Yes, he’s almost finished.  Yes sir, we will,” Abby hung up the phone and stared at it for a moment.  It was barely three o’clock and Cain was wanting them at the club now for some reason.  

 

“That was your uncle, he wants you at the club as soon as possible,” Abby said softly, reaching out to squeeze his wrist so he wouldn’t flinch too hard.

 

He knew it would come eventually, that the inevitable would soon catch up with him but somehow it had still left Samandriel off kilter. He nodded his agreement despite how badly he wanted to run, and waited for the sweet young lady to finish wiping down his feet. With a deep breath and a strength he felt like he was borrowing from someone else, Samandriel finally spoke. “Of course.”

 

Abby waited until they outside before she grabbed up Samandriel’s arm to keep him from getting in the car, “Something's not right.  You were supposed to do your show then...you know.  Your first performance isn’t until almost midnight.  So why does he need you now?” she asked with a quirked brow.

 

“I don’t know, but it would be best not to keep him waiting….” he answered, just in case he needed to be discreet. That didn’t stop him from sending an ambiguous text message to Benny to see if he was aware of the situation.

 

**Message to Benny:** _ Looks like I will have to cancel lunch with Charlie, please send her my regrets. Turns out Uncle needs me at the club. _

 

He knew that Benny would understand if he received it, but also hoped it was vague enough to keep Cain in the dark if something had happened and he had possession of Benny’s phone.

 

Abby took care of everything at the front desk and quickly ushered Samandriel to the car.  She didn’t like this at all and Amara wasn’t answering her phone either.  If she wasn’t so scared of something happening to Amara, she would just take off with Samandriel in tow.

 

It wasn’t surprising that he stayed quiet the entire ride there, his eyes downcast staring at his phone.  A cold feeling settled in her stomach as she watched his face.  He was obviously texting someone and she was assuming it must be Benny but if Amara wasn’t answering…

 

“We’re here Samandriel, do you want me to walk you in?” she asked turning around to look at him. 

 

“No, I’m perfectly capable of handling this on my own. It’s not like there’s any unwanted hands inside at this hour, right?” he answered her with as little emotion as possible. He wasn’t sure just how much he could trust at the moment and not for the first time, he wondered if Cain had somehow accessed a video camera or microphone inside his most used cars. Otherwise he didn’t understand how anyone could guessed about his relationship with Benny. They’d both been so careful. He trusted Abaddon, but he also wanted to keep her safe. His aunt deserved what little happiness she found in her prison with Cain. 

 

He stepped out of the car and moved toward the door and then the office. He just needed to stay strong a little longer. If he could at least find out if Benny was okay, whatever happened to him would be worth it. When he pushed into the office door he was confronted by Cain himself, leaned back against the dark mahogany desk. “You asked to see me, Uncle?”

 

“Ah, there he is!  Please, come in, take a seat my dear boy,” Cain said.  When his nephew hesitated for a second Cain snatched at his upper arm and pushed him into a chair.

 

“Much better. Now, there are a few things we need to discuss before tonight’s activities,” Cain said with a little smirk.

 

Samandriel nodded, trying not to sit too far down or too straight. It was always a little like walking a tightrope when in the room with his uncle. One of the very many reasons he was never at ease with the man, even when his wonderful aunt was nearby. Amara wasn’t here though, so he’d have to do his best to navigate it on his own. “Yes, uncle.”

 

“First of all, I’d like you to meet your  _ client _ for the evening,” Cain said looking over at the door when it opened.  Azazel, head of the Serphant family walked in with a huge smirk on his face.  He had someone with him that Cain just barely recognized.

 

“Azazel, I’d like you to officially meet Alfie,” Cain said moving out of the way.

 

“Mmm, as beautiful off the stage as he is on it,” Azazel grinned wolfishly as he held his hand out to take Samandriel’s.

 

Samandriel’s eyes flicked over to Castiel and he wanted nothing more than to run to him, to pull him tight against his chest and seek comfort from his patient teacher but he knew he couldn’t. He knew it would be a bad idea that they even hint at knowing one another. Instead he refocused his gaze back onto the man his uncle had introduced. 

 

Samandriel had to fight not to shrink back from the man,  _ Azazel _ . He seemed slimy despite the custom italian suit and shiny leather boots. He took a deep breath and held out his hand, fighting back the urge to vomit and trying out his best fake smile. “It’s nice to meet you.”

 

Castiel went completely rigid when they had first walked through the door and he saw Samandriel sitting there, white as a ghost.  Azazel had told him nothing of this whole “deal”.  Just that he was to accompany him to the  _ Bloodlust _ for a meeting.  He didn’t understand why but it wasn’t his place to argue.  The man was his boss after all.  But now, seeing how scared Samandriel was and then how eager Azazel was to meet him...Castiel wanted to throw up. This couldn’t be happening, Castiel squeezed his fists tight until he could feel his nails biting at his skin.  

 

“Very nice to meet you as well.  Usually I would have just met you later after you were done performing but Cain so kindly asked us to meet much sooner,” Azazel grinned.  

 

“Yes, there are other matters to discuss so if you will?” Cain asked gesturing to the side of the room.  Azazel and his little friend moved over and Cain returned to his spot in front of Samandriel.

 

“Now, nephew.  Is there anything you wish to tell me?” Cain asked.

 

Ice cold dread spun through Samandriel’s veins but he kept his composure. He wouldn’t give away one single thing, not without some kind of sign that Benny was okay. It was an easy act to keep up when it was all he had. Forcing his tone to be as light as possible, he spoke with a fake innocence and confusion. “Umm...Thank you, for the spa treatment. It was a lovely gift.”

 

“Well you’re very welcome nephew but that isn’t quite what I’m looking for actually.  Is there anything else you wish to share hmm?  No?  Well, that’s disappointing,” Cain asked, shaking his head dramatically when Samandriel stayed quiet.  He moved behind the desk and hit a button on his phone.

 

“I thought you were a lot smarter than that,” Cain mumbled before bringing the phone up to his ear, “Now.” 

 

The door pushed open with a bang and two of his guards dragged in the fighting form of none other than Benny Cormier.  Someone he had such high hopes for.

 

“Get off me!  What the hell is this!” Benny shouted trying to shove the guys off him but he yelped loudly when the back of his knees were kicked in.  He fell hard and felt his vision blur when he caught Samandriel’s wide scared eyes.   _ Fuck. _

 

A heavy weight swooped low in Samandriel’s gut the moment he laid eyes on Benny and his gorgeous body being pushed around so carelessly. He almost heaved in the trashcan beside him but if nothing else he had to stay strong, had to- _God, he couldn’t do this._ _He was nothing without Benny and it seemed pretty clear his uncle was onto them._

 

“Stay down,” Cain growled low in his throat making every nerve in Benny’s body freeze up.  He didn’t understand what was going on and why Samandriel was here so early.  There was a chuckle behind him and he damn near threw up.  Not only was Azazel Serphant here but fucking Castiel who was trying so hard to not cry and Benny tried to silently tell him it was okay.  

 

The stern tone in his uncle’s voice had Samandriel sitting rod straight, taking small breaths trying to exhale slowly and keep himself from hyperventilating. Watching Castiel so broken over Benny nearly caused his own facade to shatter but if he’d learned anything in his time with Lilith it was to  _ never  _ let them see you break. 

 

“Sir, please I don’t kn-”

 

“Oh stop your whimpering, Benny.  Be a man for fuck’s sake!” Cain barked out a laugh and reached into his pocket.

 

“Since neither of you want to tell me the truth, I’ll read it aloud for the whole class.  Recognize this,  _ cher _ ?” Cain spat dropping the crumpled note down in Samandriel’s lap.

 

All the color in Benny’s face drained and he felt light headed.  

 

“I’m sorry, what did you call me?” Samandriel asked, faking his confusion pretty well for the high pressure of the situation. He didn’t expect his uncle to believe him exactly, but he thought it might, at the very least, buy him a moment to think of something better. It wasn’t as if he could explain away the note Benny left for him, not that he really wanted to...but he had to keep Benny safe at all costs. 

 

“Come on now, it’s his little pet name for you.  Don’t ask me why, that is the silliest nickname I have ever heard,” Cain laughed, Azazel chuckling in agreement.  

 

“That would be my fault, I did forbid him from calling me  _ Alfie _ ,” Samandriel confessed, drawing his nose up in disgust at the nickname his uncle had given him. It earned him a slap across the face but it meant that the attention was back on him and more importantly away from Benny. He could bare the brunt of his uncle’s punishment if it meant Benny would have time to get away, maybe figure out some way to escape. 

 

“Keep your fucking hands off of him!” Benny shouted, his heart hammering in his chest when Cain turned those hard eyes on him.

 

“I thought you were selling me someone who was clean Cain, not some little cock slut,” Azazel sneered.  Cain bristled and wiped a napkin over his knuckles.  Benny looked over and winced at the sight of Samandriel’s split lip.

 

“Don’t worry though, the deal is still on.  I’ll break him in easily,” Azazel said, taking a step closer to Samandriel.  

 

“No…” Benny sucked in a quick breath but steadied himself.

 

“No?  You hear that, he thinks he actually has a choice in this matter,” Cain guffawed, “Well let me fill you in Benny, you will sit here and endure the wait.  Your room is ready Azazel, take him,” Cain said.  Benny let out a shout as Azazel closed the distance between him and Samandriel.

 

Samandriel felt his nerves pick up for the first time since he’d entered the building. He’d been so determined to stay strong for Benny, but seeing the man lying there helpless to stop what would happen, stole away his courage. The greasy looking snake man would steal him away and there wasn’t anything Benny could do. 

 

On instinct, Samandriel slid his chair back. Even though he knew it wouldn’t do him any good, it was only a few short inches until he hit the wall and the man would reach him quickly. In his panicked haze, Samandriel started to ramble nonsense, unable to keep his mouth shut or make use of his words. A repeat of how unfair it all was playing over and over in his mind.  “I-What about the dance, I was going to dance first.”

 

“Oh you’ll be dancing tonight, don’t you worry about that,” Azazel sneered, grabbing up his arm and yanking Samandriel to his feet.

 

“Get away from him you fucking piece of shit!” Benny shouted, jumping to his feet but didn’t get very far.  Cain pulled his gun out at him and Benny felt his heart drop right down to his knees.

 

Castiel was digging his nails into the palm of his hand so much he knew he broke the skin but he couldn’t move or even talk for that matter.  He was seeing his past becoming Samandriel’s future and he couldn’t do anything about it!

 

“Wh-What about me?  Can’t I come?” Castiel asked, praying that maybe just maybe he could save Samandriel from even half of the shit Azazel would do to him.

 

“No my pet, you’ll stay right here,” Azazel chuckled, pulling roughly at Samandriel’s arm toward the door behind the desk that would lead him straight to the private rooms.

 

Samandriel broke free, if only for a second and he dashed forward to fall beside Benny and cling to him. He knew he’d suffer for it but he didn’t care. He held on tightly for the tiny moment he’d bought himself and he sobbed, openly now. There was no use hiding it. A soft “I love you,” fell from his lips as he was yanked harshly from the ground by his hair.

 

“No!  Cain, please I’ll do anything, please don’t do this to him!” Benny shouted, his breath catching in his throat.  Cain rolled his eyes and started to turn to look at Azazel who just got his hand on the doorknob.  Everything seemed to slow down and before Benny even realized he was moving he was rushing Cain, slamming his shoulder into his sternum.  There was a lot of shouting and somehow, he managed to get his grip on Cain’s gun.

 

“Lock the door Cas, now!” Benny ordered, pointing the gun right at Azazel.  Castiel sprung into action and quickly locked the main door where the guards would ultimately try to shove their way through and pushed a chair underneath the handle.

 

“Cas?  Wait a minute, you two know each other?!” Azazel cried, his grip on Samandriel’s hair tightening.

 

“Let him go and close the door,” Benny barked.  When Azazel didn’t move Benny cocked the gun and grinned when the man finally pushed the door closed and released Samandriel a bit roughly.  Castiel ran forward and grabbed him out of the way.

 

“Benny...what the hell do you think you’re doing?  I was going to forgive this...whatever it is between you and my nephew.  I just wanted to teach you a lesson that you can’t do something like this behind my back.  You’re going to ruin your future within this family!” Cain shouted, hand clutching at the spot where Benny had rammed at him. 

 

Samandriel crumpled to the floor beside Castiel, relieved to finally be away from the harsh grip and terrifying prospects of what would have happened if Azazel had gotten him any further away from Benny. Though he wouldn’t mind seeing his uncle punished for everything he’d put him through, Samandriel also didn’t want Benny to end up spending a life sentence in prison for killing the man. 

 

“Benny, I-I’m-” he tried, though he wasn’t sure it was a very comforting statement by the time the shaky words escaped his mouth in a small voice.

 

Benny turned his head to barely glance at the collapsed forms of Castiel and Samandriel, wanting so badly to just go to them and leave.  Fuck everything and get the hell out of there.  But leaving Cain and Azazel still breathing just wasn’t an option for him.

 

Benny swallowed down the lump in his throat and took in a shaky breath, “You ruined my future when you relentlessly hunted my partner.  You ruined my life when you forced his fiance into being this piece of shit’s fucking slave!  And now you wanna further ruin it by taking Samandriel away from me and forcing him into the same hell.  It won’t matter if you let us go or if you kill me, you will still torture him.  Because that’s what you do, you sadistic bastard,” Benny said, spitting down at Cain’s torso.  

 

“Benny…” 

 

“No Cas, this asshole needs to pay….why are you laughing!” Benny shouted, pointing the gun down at Cain instead of Azazel.

 

“You...you had me.  Would have never pegged you as a goddamn cop,” Cain wheezed.

 

Samandriel’s eyes widened, he’d been confused at first, not really understanding Benny’s speech but he blamed it on the stress of the events until his uncle had cleared it up for him. 

 

_ “You’re a cop,”  _ Samandriel admitted aloud, feeling his mouth drop down in surprise.

 

His brain quickly began to analyze all the stuff they’d been through together, each interaction and it was like seeing it from a whole new perspective. He felt betrayed for a moment, not that he minded that Benny was a cop, just the fact that he felt he couldn’t tell him, couldn’t trust him with his secret. It hurt in his chest but it didn’t change the fact that he loved the man and it might have been naive but, Samandriel still believed that Benny loved him too. 

 

“Yeah, and it’s over Cain.  All of it.  Every shred of evidence and document is being sifted through and they’re coming for you.  You and the Serphant family at least, maybe the entirety of the Boston Mafia,” Benny said.

 

Castiel squeezed Samandriel’s wrist and stood up, moving to stand next to Benny, “Who shot Dean Winchester?” he demanded.  Azazel snorted, turning his back to them as he shook his head.

 

“Does it matter now?  You’ve won!” Cain laughed.  Benny looked back at Samandriel with pleading eyes and raised his gun to point straight at Cain’s chest.

 

“Forgive me, cher…”

 

Samandriel’s breath clenched in his throat but he gave a small nod. He wasn’t sure Benny could even see him, the man’s steady hand pointed unflinchingly toward his uncle. There was no love lost for the man, though he was a little worried about what it all would mean for his aunt. An explosive jolt rang through his ears as Benny fired and though he imagined he’d feel a lot of things, he wasn’t prepared for the amount of sheer relief that flooded through him.

 

Benny didn’t even take his eyes off Samandriel to make sure Cain was actually dead but the gurgling from the man’s lungs was telling enough.  He did look away long enough to see Castiel glaring hard at Azazel, who had backed himself against the wall.  The asshole really thought they were going to let him go and be free in prison.  

 

“Did you shoot my fiance?” Castiel hissed, his entire body shaking now.  Azazel refused to answer and in that, was answer enough.  Benny took up Castiel’s right hand gently and placed the gun on his open palm.

 

“For Dean,” Benny whispered.  Castiel nodded and with a steady arm, shot Azazel twice.  Both in his chest.  It was scary accurate to the very places Dean had been shot but Benny didn’t bother thinking about that.  It was over and he had to get all of them out of there before the guards broke down the doors.  

 

Benny quickly took the gun and pushed it into the back of his jeans as he turn to scoop Samandriel up from the floor.

 

“I-I know you have a lot of questions and probably hate me right now for lyin and I prom-”

 

Samandriel wanted to surge forward and kiss the man but the angle was off and he was exhausted. Still, he shook his head emphatically, “No, no I l-love you. I love you, Benny.”

 

“I love you too sweetheart,” Benny sighed and hugged Samandriel tight to him.  They could figure all this out later, just as long as Samandriel didn’t hate him he could deal with it.  Castiel was still frozen to the spot, his eyes staring almost blankly at the still form of Azazel’s body.

 

“Cas?” Benny prodded.

 

“I thought...I thought i’d feel better or have some sense of closure once I saw him dead.  But I feel nothing, Benny.  I-I don’t even know if Dean is…” Castiel covered his face and sobbed.  Benny opened his mouth to finally tell him the truth when the back door that lead to the private rooms was kicked in.  Benny yanked both Samandriel and Cas behind him and raised the gun all in a matter of seconds.  He was expecting a whole army of guards but what he wasn’t expecting was fucking Amara to be standing there with a satisfied grin on her face.

 

“Thank God,” Amara whispered, her head tilting back in relief.

 

Seeing his aunt eased the tight ache in his chest. Samandriel knew he wouldn’t easily forget any of what happened but there was comfort in the fact that the people he loved most were alive and safe. He ran to her, throwing his arms tightly around her waist and burying his nose into her soft curls. “I was so worried,” he whimpered, clinging to her in ways he’d not been able to since his father passed.

 

“Shshsh, it’s all going to be okay,” Amara cooed, dragging her nails through Samandriel’s hair, “You did so well, Samandriel.  You were so strong, I’m very proud of you,” she said, pulling away just enough to cup his face in her hands.

 

“You knew...the whole time you knew,” Benny said, taking a step closer to her.  He would have never pieced it together if she hadn’t showed up just then.  She was Cain’s wife but she was the brain’s of the entire organization...hell it was even her who’d picked him to be their new errand boy.

 

“I had an inkling.  You always did show your soft side whenever Cain got a little...handsy,” she scoffed.

 

“What happens now?” Castiel asked, his eyes falling on the gun that now bore not only Benny’s fingerprints, but his own.  Amara kissed at Samandriel’s forehead and took the gun out of Benny’s loose fingers.

 

“You leave,” she said simply.  Benny’s mouth dropped open as she wiped the grip with her dress and pressed her own fingers firmly against the cooling metal. 

 

“N-no you can’t, you can’t do that… Come with us. Benny can help you,” Samandriel pleaded, it was unmistakable that she planned to take the blame of killing both Cain and Azazel onto herself. He couldn’t imagine a way that could work out well for her or any of them, to be honest. She was smart and he trusted her, but Samandriel also knew that she would do anything, including spending the rest of her life in prison, to protect him.

 

“Don’t you worry about me little one, I have a plan and someone who’s been helping me on the other side.  Someone like Benny.  In fact you may know her, Jody Mills?” Amara asked with a knowing grin.

 

Benny cursed under his breath and an almost crazed type of laugh exploded from his mouth.  He was so incredibly tired.

 

Amara turned back to her nephew and smiled fondly, “I promised my brother that I would care for you and I failed.  So you will leave with Benny, go to Juilliard and live your life.  We’ll see each other again little one, I swear it.  Besides, who can argue with a woman who was fighting for her life?” she said looking over at the two dead men on the ground.

 

Samandriel was skeptical, but he obeyed. Clinging to her one more time he kissed at the soft skin of her cheek. A tear formed in the corner of his eye as he thought about what she’d be willing to say to keep him from being involved. He felt Benny’s thick fingers slide between his and he slowly released her; whispering, “Please be careful. I can’t lose you too.”

 

“You won’t.  Take care of him Benny and when the time is right, I’ll find you,” she said as she pulled out a thick envelope from her purse, tossing it at Benny’s chest.  Benny nodded and quickly pushed both Samandriel and Castiel toward the door.

 

Benny managed to get them all in the car and safely away from Bloodlust just before the police began to rain down on the club.  He prayed the entire way to Hyannis that Amara would be able to pull off whatever she had planned.  If not, he was willing to take the blame for both him and Castiel.  It nearly killed him that he might be ripped away from Samandriel but Castiel deserved to be free.  He owed it to him.

 

“Benny...why are we heading away from Boston?” Castiel asked, looking out of the windows.  Benny swallowed hard and didn’t answer, just kept driving.

 

Samandriel kept quiet, relaxing against the familiar leather of Benny’s seats and the smell of pine and sweat that seemed to be soaked into every surface. It did a lot to ease his panicked mind and nervous stomach. He worried that the images of what happened would flood back to him and he’d get sick but thankfully, he seemed to have it under control, if only temporarily. 

 

Castiel continued to ask questions but finally quieted when all he got out of Benny was complete silence.  He’d figure it out soon enough.  There was hardly any traffic and Benny soon forgot to keep checking his rearview mirror for flashing lights.  

 

The hospital came into view and Castiel gasped sharply as he eased the car into a parking spot.

 

“B-Benny?” Castiel asked almost in awe, his hand reaching over the seat to grip at his shoulder.  Benny gave him a small smile and nodded his head toward the building.

 

“Go on,  third floor room 316,” Benny said softly.  He watched Castiel scramble out of the car and run toward the mechanical doors.  


	13. Chapter 13

Castiel felt like he was going to die, he could barely pull any air into his lungs but at the moment he couldn’t care.  Benny didn’t need to say the words, Dean was alive and in this hospital.  His friend would never stop blaming himself for what happened but where he thought he failed, Benny managed to keep Dean hidden even from him.  There was a girl at the front desk who called after him but he didn’t care, he just kept running until the door of room 316 was in front of him and he covered his mouth.

 

After four years of an endless hell, he was going to finally see his fiance again.  He took in a shuddering breath and pushed the door open.  It was dark and there was a steady sound of a beep in the room.  He was scared to move forward but something nudged him and when he finally saw Dean he almost collapsed.  

 

“Oh God, Dean,” Castiel sobbed, pressing his face into his hands.

 

“Castiel?” Sam groaned, lifting his head up from where he’d started to doze over his criminal law book. It had taken his eyes a moment to adjust but the familiar shape of messy black hair quickly had him struggling to blink them open. It had been way too long since he’d seen the guy, he actually started to believe it was a dream.

 

Castiel jumped when heard his name, his hands instantly coming down so he could look around, “Sam?  Sam!” Castiel cried and didn’t even care that they had never really been friends.  It had been so long since he’d seen anyone from his past.  He practically flung himself forward to hug the youngest Winchester and found himself sobbing against his shoulder.

 

“I-It’s so good to see you,” Castiel laughed.

 

“God, where have you been? Mom’s been worried sick, we all have. Dean too, probably.” Sam answered, standing up to pull the guy into a hug. Even though it had only been a split second, Sam could have sworn he’d felt the air in the room shift to something different. He couldn’t place what it was until Castiel finally started to back away from him. 

 

The ache that usually seemed to pour from his brother had finally settled into something much softer and though he knew Dean would just laugh at him for doing it, Sam allowed a small bud of hope to form in his chest.  _ Maybe this was it, maybe Cas could bring Dean back to them. _ It was ridiculous, but Sam felt it was possible and that was enough.

 

“I’ll explain later...it’s not exactly a pretty story,” Castiel stammered.  He was ashamed of everything that had happened to him but right now he wanted to focus on being reunited with his family.  He forced himself to turn and look at Dean, only the warmth of having Sam at his back gave him the strength to move closer.  

 

Even in this state Dean was beautiful and it hurt his heart that he couldn't see Dean’s eyes.  He had dreamed about them almost every night and it wasn’t fair that now he was back, he was being denied one of his favorite things in the world.  

 

“I’m so sorry Dean...I’m here now,” Castiel whispered, pushing himself to sit down in the chair by the bed.  There was a surge of something electric in the room and Castiel swallowed hard as his pulse raced.  He wasn’t sure what this was but he found himself reaching for Dean without even knowing he was doing so.  Sam gasped sharply from behind him the moment his hand touched Dean’s shoulder.

 

The steady beeps began to pick up and suddenly and Sam found himself jerking forward to get at his brother’s side. Eager to see even the smallest movement. An almost audible pulse piped through the room when Castiel’s hand made contact with his brother’s shoulder. Suddenly there was a gasp and Sam barely held himself up as he pushed his finger against the call button hard enough to nearly break it.

 

“NURSE, NURSE!” he shouted, tears flooding his cheeks. After so long holding it all in Sam finally broke. He might actually have his brother back.

 

Castiel almost withdrew his hand in surprise but instead pushed his fingers under the hospital gown to touch at Dean’s warm skin.  The machines were going crazy and he was sobbing all over again when he finally got to see a sliver of those brilliant green eyes.

 

“Dean?  Can you hear me?” Castiel asked, his tone almost pleading as he cupped the side of Dean’s face with his other hand.

 

He’d been fighting for what felt like years but suddenly there was something in the darkness, something warm and soft and it called to him. Dean reached out for it, wading through the sticky ground that had been pulling him down for so long. He sliced and fought through the terrain to get to it and when he thought he could finally reach it he stretched out his arm and grabbed ahold of the brilliant light in the unending black hell. 

 

Nurses sped into the room, pushing Sam out of the way but Cas seemed relentless and he couldn’t be more grateful for it. It was stupid, but something told him that it wouldn’t be good to separate them, even now that it looked like Dean was awake. Soon they’d released all the tubes from his brother’s face, and he heard a deep rasp. 

 

“Dean? Dean! Oh thank, God.” Sam cried out, grateful that even if he couldn’t talk just yet, Dean was conscious. Not hesitating, he flew back to his brother’s side but also pulled his phone out. His mother would kill him for keeping it from her for even a second longer. 

 

Castiel floundered for a moment before someone was pushing a cup of water in front of him.  He snatched it up and without breaking contact, slid the hand from Dean’s shoulder to cup the back of his neck.

 

“Drink,” he said just above a whisper and helped Dean to sip at the water.  It was taking every inch of his will power to not crawl into the bed and cling to his fiance tightly.  He wanted to find a mirror and make himself a little more presentable, he was a mess of tangled hair and tears.

 

Dean sipped at the cold liquid, he was confused by how raw and sore his throat was but he didn’t let it stop him. Cas looked terrified and Dean couldn’t allow that any longer. He did his best to smile back at his gorgeous fiance’ who was practically trembling in his arms. Whatever he’d done must have worried the crap out of everyone.

 

He had every intention of saying, “Good morning, beautiful;” but it came out so broken and warbled that he wasn’t even sure anyone could understand him.

 

“Hello Dean,” Castiel said, trying so hard to keep it together but he ended up falling apart, his head falling down to press into Dean’s chest as he sobbed.  He had his fiance back...he had his life back.

 

“Sir, you should sit down,” A nurse said, trying to pull Castiel away from Dean.

 

He was a little confused by the reaction, to be honest. He’d expected tears from Cas for anything that could land him in a hospital but this seemed  _ different. _ Cas had never broken down like this and it worried him. Sammy wasn’t doin’ much better, the alligator tears spilling down his brother’s giant face left an anchored weight in his gut. 

 

Dean turned his attention back to Cas, reaching to run his fingers through the soft dark hair only to find it difficult to bend the joints in his hand. Fighting back his panic over that revelation, Dean instead settled it against the warm skin of Castiel’s arm and looked up at those gorgeous blue eyes. “Y-ou k?” 

 

The nurse tried to pull at him again and Castiel forgot all his manners and slapped at her hands.  She finally gave up and moved away from the bed.  Castiel leaned back down to press their foreheads together and took in a deep breath.

 

“I’m better now baby.  Fuck, I missed you so much Dean,” Castiel whispered, brushing his lips against Dean’s temple.

 

Dean wanted to beg, plead with Cas that there was nothing to miss...he’d been right there waiting for him. He wanted so badly to comfort his fiance’ to just curl around him and protect him from the world if that’s what it took to take the glittery shine from those beautiful blue eyes. He couldn’t push it though, not really. Not only could he not speak properly, but it was clear that things weren’t as simple as he’d thought when he woke up. Though he couldn’t hear all of the conversation, Sam seemed far too rushed to get his mom there, not to mention the way his side of the room was more lived-in and less sterile than the other side. 

 

“Wa’s hap’n?” he asked, grumbling in his throat to clear his voice before trying again. “What happened?” 

 

“He really should be resting, not over using his voice,” the same pushy nurse said, her hands on her hips.  Castiel glared at her before giving Sam an even more pointed one.  Sam got the hint and huffed out a laugh as he gently talked the nurse out of the room.  

 

Once they were alone Castiel scrambled onto the bed and wrapped himself tightly around Dean.  His breathing coming out in gasps.  It didn’t matter if he had been touched every single day, they were unwanted and now he was touch starved for the warmth of his fiance.  

 

“I-I don’t even know where to begin...God Dean what you’ll think of me,” Castiel sobbed into Dean’s chest.  He hadn’t even thought of what it would mean for the truth to come out.  Dean could very easily become disgusted and throw him away and Castiel couldn't even argue with that.

 

“Shh,” Dean croaked, rubbing small circles into Cas’ skin. Whatever it was that his fiance’ was worked up about, they’d face it together. He wanted to tell Cas that everything was going to be okay but the words wouldn’t come out right so he just wrapped his arms around him and squeezed. They were thankfully, easier to move than his hands had been. “S’kay.”

 

“No...no it’s not,” Castiel mumbled.  He reveled in the feeling of having Dean’s arms around him again and finally lifted his head up enough to gaze into Dean’s face.

 

“Dean, you’ve been in a c-coma for um,” Castiel cleared his throat and took in a deep breath, “Four years.  It’s been four years Dean.”

 

His eyes went wide and Dean tried to swallow but his dusty throat wouldn’t allow it.  _ Four years, holy shit. Four fucking years of his life….gone. So much of their time together taken from them, Dean’s lucky Cas is even here. How had so much of his life just slipped away from him like that. _

 

Now that he was looking, he could see a few small cracks on Castiel’s young face that hadn’t been there before. His heart seemed to shatter when he realized that they weren’t happy wrinkles, like dimple creases or laugh lines but harsher ones. A couple ridges in the middle of his forehead marking his worry and disapproval and another smaller set etched at the corner of his lips when they were curled lower into a sad frown.

 

Dean reached out to take Cas’ hand, ready to apologize when he noticed something missing and his heart dropped immediately. It was too much to expect, he knew it had been but it hadn’t stopped him. He’d kept Castiel waiting for four years and as much as it felt like his insides were being carved out like pumpkin, Dean tried to be understanding. Castiel had moved on and what kind of person could blame him for that.

 

_ Still, he held tightly while it was allowed.  _ “S’okay,” he said again, more forcefully as his thumb rubbed over the empty space on Castiel’s finger. Something warm and wet made it’s way down the side of his face and he only absently realized he’d cried tears of his own. 

 

Castiel frowned even deeper and he was embarrassed to admit how long it took for him to realize why Dean was so upset.  

 

“Dean, no no no, please.  Shit, I’m so sorry,” he said frantically digging into his jeans to pull out his ring.  With trembling fingers he pushed it onto his ring finger and clung to Dean.

 

“I didn’t even think...Benny he-he just pulled up to this hospital and I knew you were in here.  He kept you hidden and safe all this time.  Fuck I didn’t know you were even alive until today and I always kept your ring close and I put it on when I needed to remember you and fuck...Dean I’m sorry,” Castiel cried, wiping at his face roughly.  He knew he wasn’t making sense at all but it was coming out in a garbled mess that he couldn't seem to stop.

 

Something warm curled through him once Dean realized he was wrong, though he wasn’t exactly sure why Cas hadn’t been wearing his ring he didn’t care. Cas was his again and as selfish as it might have been, that’s all that mattered at the moment. He just held on, letting whatever Castiel was trying to cry out, get through him. None of it mattered, nothing but him and the guy he loved.


	14. Chapter 14

Once Castiel ran from the car, Samandriel nearly followed but Benny didn’t appear to be getting out, so he sat still. Everything still felt so raw but he knew they needed to discuss some things. That he should at least let Benny know he was upset, and that no matter how angry or hurt he might be, that it didn’t mean he loved him any less. All the words he knew he should say stuck on the tip of his tongue as the sun began to dip below the treeline.

 

Finally, after a deep breath and the clear sign that Benny wouldn’t be the first one to talk, Samandriel spoke. “I love you, so much and even though you should know that I’ll forgive you for keeping secrets, it really hurt to think you didn’t feel safe enough to share them with me.”

 

Benny gripped the steering wheel for a moment before letting his hand fall into his lap.  If he was being honest with himself, he had expected something far worse from Samandriel.  

 

“It’s not like that cher...I did trust you.  But it would have been one more thing they could have hurt you with if they had figured me out.  It was selfish of me to even put you in this position to begin with.  I wanted to keep you safe...I just wanted to keep  _ everyone  _ safe,” Benny whispered the last sentence and swallowed hard.  He’d managed to get them all out of there and Castiel reunited with Dean but at what cost to him personally?  He had to keep reminding himself it wasn’t even about him.  

 

“I’m so sorry, Samandriel.”

 

“I understand, I do...I wouldn’t forgive you if I thought you’d intentionally hidden things from me for no reason at all,” he admitted, lacing his fingers through Benny’s shaking hand. He took a long look at the man who’d seemingly had the life drained out of him. All that joy and kindness turned into sour misery and regret. He hated seeing him like that, it made something awful well up in his chest. Letting out a long sigh, Samandriel snuggled closer. “You try so hard to take care of everyone else, but who takes care of you? I tried, I fought so hard to help and I felt like we were getting there but now, you’re shutting down. It’s like you won’t even let me try anymore.”

 

Benny squeezed at Samandriel’s hand desperately and let out a shuddering breath, “I’ve been this... goon,  _ Cormier _ for so long.  I’m scared that I don't know how to be the old me anymore.  I’m scared you won’t-” Benny closed his eyes and held his breath, “I’m scared that you won’t love me as Benny Lafitte.  A scared and very lonely man.  Fuck, I’ve never even shot someone before.”

 

“I want to let you in...I just don’t know how anymore.”

 

Samandriel’s heart warmed at the confession. It wasn’t exactly happy news but Benny was opening up to him, sharing with him and that felt like everything he needed for now. He chose his words carefully, enjoying the silence between them for a short moment. “You said you love me, that you trust me. How about for now, you just let me tell you who Benny  _ Lafitte _ is and maybe eventually you can find him in there yourself,” he proposed, his pointer finger tracing over the space where Benny’s heart was pumping wildly in his chest. 

 

Benny released the breath he was holding and nodded slowly, his hand still gripping Samandriel’s tightly.

 

“Benny  _ Lafitte _ is stubborn, sarcastic, and an absolute cheater at Texas Hold’em,” Samandriel teased, feeling his lips curl up again for the first time since Abby had escorted him into his uncle’s car. “He’s strong but tender, loyal and brave, and even though I’ve only just learned his last name, I’ve fallen head over heels in love with him.” 

 

Benny laughed a little and finally turned to really look at Samandriel, “Tha-”

 

“I’m not finished.” Samandriel cut him off, chasing his words with a quick press of his lips against Benny’s hand before digging beneath his shirt and pulling out the ring suspended on a borrowed chain. “He’s a good man and this morning he left me with this beautiful ring. Maybe it’s just a small trinket to him, or perhaps a family heirloom, I don’t know yet but it gave me all these wonderful ideas. A future filled with dancing and happy faces and so much love that I thought I’d suffocate from it.” 

 

Samandriel licked his lips and looked up at Benny with the most stern expression he could manage, “and earlier today when I needed him more than ever, he didn’t let me down.” Taking another deep breath, Samandriel spoke again, “Benny  _ Lafitte  _ saved my life.”

 

Not even allowing the man to butt in an argument, Samandriel pressed a finger to those gorgeous plump lips and finished his thought, “Who’s to know if I would have made it out of that room alive, and even if I did, how much of me would have actually returned had it not been for you. I’m not going to lie, I have no idea what you must be feeling after today but I know how  _ I _ feel and mostly, it’s relieved and grateful.” 

 

Benny couldn’t hold it back anymore and let the first of several tears fall down as he pushed the seat back and then practically tugged Samandriel into his lap.  Everything inside of him was bursting, leaving him raw and fragile.  All he could do was hold onto Samandriel and try to relearn how to breathe.

 

“I love you,” Benny whispered, burrowing his face between Samandriel’s neck and shoulder.  

 

Samandriel did what he could to comfort him, taking his lessons from Benny and rubbing small circles wherever his thumb could find bare skin. It turned out to closest spot was the nape of Benny’s thick neck. Samandriel gladly tilted his head over, opening up the hollows of his throat to give the man better access. 

 

“I love you too. So fucking much. Listen to me, you’ve got me cursing…” he teased, chuckling his laugh across the top of Benny’s head. 

 

Benny huffed out a laugh and sighed heavily as he pulled out of his favorite hiding spot, “Even though this was...completely horrible and I would really love to forget a lot of it, I am so beyond grateful that it brought me to you,” Benny said tracing Samandriel’s bottom lip with his thumb.

 

Something was unscrewing in his chest and though he knew that none of it was truly over or dealt with, Samandriel felt himself almost rejoicing in his freedom. He was still worried about his aunt, and even Abaddon, but with Benny that all seemed to melt away and he finally found his happiness again. 

 

Taking the opportunity, Samandriel opened his mouth and sucked greedily at the tip of Benny’s thumb that had fallen between his lips. The man seemed shocked at first, understandably, but when he pulled back and gave Benny a shy, curious look, blinking wide eyes down at him, it was easy to speak. “I could help you forget.”

 

Benny didn’t even try to deny how tempted he was but it didn’t feel right.  Castiel was inside with Dean and he had promised himself the next time he was be able to be with Samandriel, he’d take his time in a real bed.  He leaned forward and kissed Samandriel slowly, keeping their foreheads pressed together.

 

“I would love that but I wanna take you to my place first.  It’s small and cramped but I want to take you apart on an actual bed and not have to worry about running out first thing in the morning,” Benny answered softly.

 

Samandriel grinned, immediately agreeing. Though he stopped almost as quickly as he started when he realized that he probably wouldn’t have had anywhere to go if Benny hadn’t invited him over. “I-I would love that, but I just realized that I don’t actually have anywhere to stay...it’s not like I  _ want _ to go back to the palace, but even if I did, I probably can’t...right?”

 

“It probably wouldn’t be a good idea until I hear from my contacts.  I do need to check in,” Benny sighed heavily.  He was actually pretty surprised he hadn’t gotten an angry phone call from either Jody or Vic wondering where the hell he was.  

 

“Shit, I probably shouldn’t even go back to the apartment…” Benny shifted in his seat and grunted when something poked him.  It was then he remembered the envelope Amara had handed to him.  He moved Samandriel off him for a moment to get it out of his back pocket before they settled back in the seat.

 

“I think she meant this for you,” Benny said handing it over.

 

Samandriel felt of the bulging package wondering what on earth it could possibly be until he slid open the sealed top and nearly dropped it. “W-wwhat?” he shouted a little louder than he probably should have, hissing a warning at himself as the stacks and stacks of green bills tipped up and almost fell out. Inside was a note and with shaky hands Samandriel pulled it out. 

 

“Holy shit,” Benny hissed, looking into the envelope.  There was, at the very least, ten-thousand dollars in there and that was just Benny making a quick guess.

  
  


_ Dear Samandriel, _

 

_ I know you have so many questions and I hope to be able to answer one day.  One thing I can tell you is that from the moment Cain demanded your presence, I knew something was wrong.  Jody has been coming to me for years, begging for my cooperation to bring down my husband.  I never thought I’d be able to do it until you came.  I failed in protecting you from him turning you into a stripper but if you’re reading this letter now, then things have fallen into place and Benny was able to save you from that monster. _

 

_ Do not worry about me nephew, Abby and I will be safe.  Once everything has blown over and the death of Cain and Azazel are deemed as self defense, we will see each other again. _

 

_ This money is just to help you start over.  I have rented out a private, off the books house in the Hamptons for you and Benny to get reacquainted and to just breathe easily for a while.  You will receive the rest of your “payment” when I hear word that you have registered for Juliard.   _

 

_ Also, to make up for some of the evil that my husband spread, I have taken the liberty to also include Benny’s friend in on this deal.  We have a family  friend in the admissions department so please let Castiel know that his tuition will be paid  the moment he registers.   _

 

_ I know money does not make everything right but sometimes it helps to make up for the things that were forcibly taken away. _

 

_ I love you little one and we will see each other again soon _

 

_ Amara. _

 

Samandriel’s hand was shaking as he sorted through the rental agreement and other papers she’d stuffed in behind the alarming amount of cash. He’d never had more than a few hundred dollars to himself, this was  _ overwhelming _ to say the least. He passed the note to Benny to make sure he was able to read it more clearly than just a few glances over his shoulder. He sat there, motionless as he tried to wrap his head around everything his aunt had handed to him, as if it were nothing. 

 

“Oh my God...that woman amazes me,” Benny laughed a little and handed the letter back.  There was something on Samandriel’s lap and he plucked it up.  He didn’t recognize the man but he knew instantly who the young child was in his arms had to be.  

 

“Cher, look,” he said handing the picture over and holding Samandriel closer.

 

Samandriel gasped, a photo of his father. It had been so long since he’d seen one, he wasn’t even sure if the image in his head was right anymore. Lilith had relentlessly destroyed every picture she’d found over the years and the last one he remembered having was tucked into small notebook hidden away in his pillowcase. She’d suspected him of hiding food or at least that’s what she’d said as an excuse to snoop through his room. When she’d found the photo she laughed and ripped it in two, and in two again until the last print of his father was just a shredded piece of copy paper. 

  
  


Cain wasn’t one for photos either, the only ones Samandriel knew of were the very few his uncle had chosen to “ _ keep up appearances.” _ and those were strictly of himself and Amara, no one else. Samandriel’s finger traced over the smooth surface of his father’s face as he felt a familiar sting building at the corner of his eye.

 

Benny brushed his lips over Samandriel’s temple and continued to hold him as they relaxed against each other.  He had no idea how long it would take for Castiel to finally emerge from the hospital but he didn’t care, he was content and had Samandriel snuggled up in his arms.  Life was pretty good at that moment.


	15. Chapter 15

Benny was a nervous wreck.  It had been hours before Castiel finally texted him but it wasn’t to let him know he was coming out.  It was to tell him Dean was actually awake and talking.  Benny had nearly pissed himself but instead he sat there reading the text over and over again as he cried.  He tried to explain it to Samandriel but he was so lost for words. He managed a few garbled sentences and hoped his boyfriend would get the gist of the situation.

 

Here he stood in front of the door (which was now correctly labeled) with Samandriel standing next to him.  He swallowed hard and slowly started to enter the room.  The windows were drawn open and it definitely had a completely different feel from the last time he’d been here.

 

Castiel was perched up on the bed next to Dean with a smile that Benny hadn’t seen in years and when he heard that laugh, it was like music to his damn ears.  Everything quieted though when they realized Benny was there now and his heart dropped to his gut when Dean sat up a bit to look at him.

 

“I uh,” Dean cleared his throat, not really knowing how to show his gratitude for everything Benny had gone through to protect him and even Cas when he could. His emotions were already raw from what his fiance had to tell him and the hell his mother had stirred up when she got there. Sam had talked into taking her somewhere to eat and get some sleep before they got in too deep. This though, he’d been waiting for this. The words might not come easy, but everything else did. A wide grin split across Dean’s face and he opened his arms wide toward Benny with an exaggerated hand gesture, “C’mon already, dontcha’ think I’ve waited long enough.”

 

“Fuck Dean,” Benny laughed, damn near tripping on himself to get at his best friend.  He hugged the man tightly and nearly sagged with the relief that Dean was back.  It was all over, everyone was safe and Dean was awake.

 

“Missed ya brother,” Benny said.

 

“You too, man...sounds like you been through hell while I was on vacation,” he confessed, a real, genuine laugh escaping between his lips. From the way Cas told it, Benny had pretty much taken care of everything and everyone he loved for the last four years and there was no way of describing just how grateful he was for it all. 

 

“Thanks, man. I uh-yknow, I appreciate it,” he answered, adding on a gesture he was sure Benny would understand to mean all that junk Dean hated saying aloud.

 

Benny laughed a little and nodded, reaching out to pull Samandriel in closer, “Dean, I’d like you to meet Samandriel.  Samandriel, this is my best friend and partner Dean, Castiel’s fiance,” Benny said.

 

“Hi,” Samandriel offered, a little embarrassed to be meeting such an important person in Benny’s life while looking disheveled and feeling like the filth of the club was still clinging to his skin. “It’s really nice to meet you. Benny was just telling me a few stories about you while we waited for Cas.”

 

“Oh God, which one did you choose to tell him?” Castiel laughed snuggling deeper into Dean’s side.

 

Benny smirked, taking a seat in one of the more roomier chairs and pulled Samandriel onto his lap, “Oh you know, just the horrible one of how we met and eventually became partners,” Benny laughed.  Castiel turned a beet red and hid his face against Dean’s shoulder and Benny had to suck in a sharp breath.  How long would it take for the feeling of normalcy to return?  He’d seen Castiel do that very thing so many times before but now it was almost sacred.

 

Dean covered his face with one hand and shook his head, a loud laugh bubbling out of his chest even though he’d tried to hold it back. “Of course you led with that one, it always makes you look like the hero and turns me into a goddamn princess waiting to be rescued.”

 

“Just wait, soon you’ll have enough dirt on him to get whatever you want.” Dean offered toward Samandriel who was adorably giggling into Benny’s side. They looked tired, but good. His best friend seemed actually happy for what felt like a long time even for him and Dean had been out cold for the last  _ four fuckin’ years _ . Still, it was a good look on Benny. 

 

“I would appreciate it. Though, I don’t usually have much trouble getting what I want from him.” Samandriel hid in Benny’s neck, feeling the heat flood his face as he thought about how that sounded. Despite his embarrassment, Samandriel still found himself laughing along with the others. 

 

The cold feeling eased away and Benny found himself laughing and sharing stories with the rest of them.  It was getting late and there were a few times he half expected to get a call from Cain.  Then he would remember him lying on the floor in a heap.

 

Shaking his head he shifted his weight a bit and rubbed at his eyes as Castiel launched into the story of how actually met Dean.  It was a cute one and one he’d heard a millions times but the way they were looking at each other now made Benny’s chest squeeze.

 

“I never imagined Dean to actually show up at the park and help me build fountains for the bees,” Castiel smiled, his cheeks turning red as he looked at his fiance lovingly.

 

“Well, I had to get your number  _ somehow. _ ” Dean laughed, holding onto Cas just a little tighter. His eyes started to flutter shut but he kept himself awake. He’d been sleeping for so long and two of the people he cared about most were in this room, not to mention the kid that put a smile like that on Benny’s face. Dean had to learn more about him. “So what about you, how’d you two meet?”

 

Samandriel froze, not really sure how much of the story Benny wanted relayed to his friend after such a traumatizing event. He squeezed gently at the roughly calloused fingers between his own. “It’s okay,” he whispered, making sure that Benny knew he’d understand if the man wasn’t eager to relive the experience, or any of it.

 

“Dean...I don’t know how much Cas told ya but um, I was undercover for a really...really long time.  I was Cain’s goon and recently got promoted to being their key driver.  Which, is how I met Samandriel.  He’s Amara’s nephew,” Benny said, keeping his and Dean’s eyes locked.  He knew deep down Dean would understand and hopefully someday he’d be able to accept the fact that Benny fell in love with the enemy’s kin.  

 

Before Dean could retort Castiel squeezed at Dean’s arm, “He’s like me Dean,” Castiel said in a hushed tone.  He kept telling himself that Dean would understand him without him actually saying the words.  Telling Dean everything that had happened the last few years had been one of the hardest things he’d ever done.  From his dream of going to Juliard being ripped away, to being “sold” into Azazel’s care and the rapes that followed.  Samandriel had been so close in suffering from the same fate.

 

Dean’s chest got tight with the memory of everything Cas explained. There were things done to the man he loved that Dean was  _ almost _ grateful he missed, for fear of an uncontrollable rage landing him in prison. He didn’t need Benny to understand, or to relive whatever hell it seemed he and his boyfriend had gone through. 

 

“So no criminal record then, you’re clean?” Dean asked, fighting back the urge to grin when Samandriel practically fell over himself to reassure him that he’d never been in trouble with the law, When he felt reassured that he’d properly teased the boy, Dean finally allowed his smile to stretch. “We’re good then...heck, for the size of that smile on my buddy’s face I might have even forgiven some jail time.”

 

It took a little  _ too _ long for Samandriel to realize that Dean was playfully joking with him. When he did though, it was easy to see how Benny had been so relaxed about it. The man was a bear when it came to being protective of Samandriel but he’d not so much as twitched after Dean’s comment. 

 

Benny snickered, pulling Samandriel close to kiss at his cheek.  The anxious pinching feeling was easing away the longer he sat there with his friends and boyfriend.  The life of Benny Cormier was becoming more and more dim and for that he was eternally grateful.  It would always be there of course and would more than likely pop up at the worst times but he could deal with it.  They all had their lives back.

 

Samandriel smiled as Castiel picked up the conversation; only half heartedly apologizing for Dean’s playful nature before launching into something else. It was just as well, Samandriel wasn’t looking for an apology. For the first time in too long he felt camaraderie, something Benny couldn’t have given him, not with the way he felt about him at least. Almost everyone seemed to want nothing more than to use him; Lilith, his uncle, that slimy man from the club, The only exceptions being Amara, Benny and the small circle of  _ decent  _ people that came along with knowing the man.

 

Thinking of his aunt brought back the memory of her generosity and a warm feeling flooded his stomach as he realized he’d still not spoken to Castiel about her offer. He briefly wondered if he should get him alone first, if perhaps it wouldn’t be something he’d be excited about after everything that happened, but he dismissed that quickly. If nothing else, he knew that Castiel wouldn’t leave Dean’s side regardless. Just as sure as he wouldn’t either, if it had been Benny.

 

Clearing his throat, Samandriel forced himself to speak up during a very brief silence. “I uh, I have something for you, Castiel...if you want it. Benny and I were going through the envelope Amara gave me before we left and she’s...If you’d like, she’s offered to pay for you,  _ us  _ to go to Juliard.” 

 

Castiel laughed a little thinking Samandriel was joking with him but when both Benny and Samandriel continued to look at him with hopeful faces Castiel’s stomach swooped.

 

“Wait..a-are you serious?” Castiel asked sitting up a bit straighter.  He’d given up his dream of going to Juliard three years ago when this hell seemed endless.

 

Samandriel nodded eagerly, “Yeah, I mean it can’t really fix anything but...if you wanted to go, you could. She would take care of everything. Benny and I haven’t worked out the details yet, but if he’s willing to come with me and I can still get in,” he paused, trying not to let his self esteem push so low that he couldn’t continue. He’d just have to keep trying, no matter what. “ _ When _ I get accepted again, I’ll start this fall. I hope you’ll come with me…”

 

“Yes-Yeah, he does.. he wants to go. Right, Cas?” Dean asked, feeling more hopeful than he had since he woke up to those sad blue eyes and the tentative smiles. So much had been taken from Cas, so  _ fucking _ much, but this could actually give him something to hope for, something to hold onto.

 

Castiel opened his mouth to scream the word  _ yes _ but he found himself sinking back, doubt and fear nearly drowning him.  What if he got there and all they saw was an ex stripper who pretends to dance in the dark in his dressing room?  That and was he willing to be separated from Dean again or take him from his family?  He couldn’t do either.

 

“I don’t-” Castiel swallowed hard and looked down at his hands, “I don’t know…”

 

“He’ll go...we’ll figure it out but he’ll go,” Dean insisted, refusing to let the shocked and then withdrawn expression knock him off balance. Squeezing Cas’ hand with his unused muscles. Dean knew that even if he got back to work immediately, there was no way he could afford Juliard on his salary, not without locking them both into crippling debt. It had been Castiel’s dream for so long and more than anything, Dean wanted to give it to him. 

 

“Well you don’t have to decide tonight. Technically, I haven’t even made a final decision. I don’t think I will until Benny and I really talk it over and I make sure that my aunt is going to be alright.” Samandriel answered, snuggling up to Benny but not looking him in the eye. He knew there’d be a confused if not concerned expression looking back at him and he wasn’t ready to face it just yet. He’d explain later that he didn’t want to leave without Benny, that he couldn’t bare the thought of moving to a new city alone.

 

“Dean...what about your family?  Your mom?  Sam?  I can’t ask you to leave them and I can’t...I can’t bear the thought of being without you again,” Castiel said, his breathing getting a little uneven at just the memories of being so alone and scared, not even knowing if his fiance was alive.  He was gripping Dean’s hand tightly and was trying to calm down and breathe again.

 

Benny was watching both Samandriel and Castiel practically falling apart and he couldn’t let this continue.  He gently moved Samandriel off his lap and pulled him toward the bed until the four of them were within touching distance.  

 

“Listen to me, both of you.  You’re both going, end of story.  You two are done sacrificing your dreams, especially when it’s been gifted to you.  Cas, I’ve known Dean since I was a snot nose punk who he punched in the face for being a little prick.  He’s my best friend and brother and I know that he’ll follow you anywhere.  And cher, I’ll do the same for you too,” Benny said cupping the side of Samandriel’s face.

 

“We’ll figure it out but at the end of the day, you’re goin,” Benny said leveling his own boyfriend with a firm stare before giving the same to Castiel.

 

“Yeah, listen to  _ Frenchie, _ you’re going.” Dean agreed, leaning over to peck at his fiance’s lips. He thought about how disconcerting it was to see the fear and panic on Cas’ gorgeous face when he’d only thought of leaving him behind. It was awful and beautiful at the same time but mostly Dean was just eager to reassure both Cas and himself. He didn’t care how long he had to stay in this goddamned hospital. The moment he broke free, Dean would take Cas to the closest court house and they’d get married on paper. After that, the wedding could happen whenever and however Cas wanted, but he wouldn’t waste one more day. They should have already started their lives together and Dean didn’t want to put it off any longer.

 

Samandriel held tightly onto Benny’s hand, relieved that the man hadn’t even hesitated to agree to follow him. He should probably feel bad, guilty for putting Benny in a position to uproot his life so quickly after such a short relationship, but he couldn’t. Not with the warm arms wrapped around him or the soft pecks Benny was skating over his neck in an effort to reassure and comfort him. So instead, he turned and smiled whispering, “I love you.”

 

“I love you too sweetheart,” Benny said with a warm smile before kissing him.  This small fragile moment was settling back to a calmer state when the door pushed open and Sam came staggering in with his arms full of food bags.

 

Sam’s arms were full and there were at least three able bodied guys there, yet not one of them offered him help. Though the feel of the room was certainly different than he’d expected. Not somber, but certainly not free and easy either. “Uh...everything okay?”

 

Castiel blinked a few times and quickly wiggled off the bed to help Sam with the food, “Yeah, just...talking about me and Samandriel going to Juliard,” Castiel said softly, barely even looking at Sam.  He was waiting for the anger, the accusation of Castiel stealing his brother away.

 

“Oh, that’s so cool… contemporary dance right?” Sam asked, trying to recall all of the things Dean had told him about Cas. His brother was definitely a bragger. Unfortunately Sam had only been able to spend a little time getting to know Cas before the accident and afterward the guy just disappeared. 

 

Castiel bit his lip and searched Sam’s face for a moment, “Yes,” he watched as Sam started to pull the food out of the bags and Castiel gently touched his arm to stop him, “A-Are you mad?” he asked in almost a whisper.

 

Sam looked back at his future brother-in-law and squinted in confusion, trying to think of reasons he could possibly be angry at Castiel. Sure, he was upset that they’d not spent more time together over the last four years, it would have been nice to feel like he had another brother around who missed Dean as much if not more than he did. Still, being angry wouldn’t help anyone and Sam had only caught brief details, but it seemed Castiel had a legitimate reason for staying away. 

 

Leaning in as if they were sharing a secret talk; Sam asked, “Why would I be mad?” 

 

Castiel swallowed nervously and picked at the edges of the chair, “Because your brother wants to come with me…” he said looking down.

 

“And…” Sam stopped, realizing what frankly took him far too long to notice. With a wide smirk he turned back toward his brother’s silent bedside and laughed. “You guys know that it’s less than a four hour drive to the city right? I mean it’s practically the same from here to Boston.” 

 

“Wait...what?” Castiel said, feeling embarrassed and confused.  Benny barked out a laugh as he pulled out his phone to search it on google maps.  And there it was, four hours away.  Castiel collapsed back on Dean’s bed in a fit of nearly hysterical giggles of relief as the others joined him.

 

“Well...we’re just one dramatic group ain't we?” Benny chuckled, rolling his eyes at how utterly silly they’d been about the whole thing.  

 

“I just woke up from a coma like a daytime soap star, what’s your excuse?” Dean teased, making grabby hands toward the food Sam started to dig out. Seeing most of his family gathered around him, strong and happy did a lot to ease the sick tension that still lingered in his chest from the hellacious nightmares of the darkness. Dean could practically feel the anxious nerves fading away with warm laughter and the true feeling of being home.


	16. Epilogue

Samandriel heaved his bag over the rack Benny had put up beside the door. His muscles were aching with soreness, but still his face was split open into a smile. He couldn’t remember a time in his life when he was happier. He used to imagine what it must have been like when both his mother and father were alive; when it was constant love and affection, but he couldn’t actually pull up any memories from such a time. This though, this was true happiness, pictures of joy and laughter etched into his mind for the rest of his days. 

 

He slipped into the kitchen unsurprised to find Benny humming along with the small stereo as he moved around preparing their dinner. “Hey,” he said, the familiar warmth curling through him when Benny turned to face him, already grinning. Samandriel slipped closer and wrapped his sore arms around the man he loved and held tightly to him. “I can’t stay long, I need a shower but I couldn’t resist this,” he continued, pointing his face up toward Benny with an impatient expression.

 

“Mmm, welcome home cher,” Benny said, gently grabbing at Samandriel’s chin before leaning in and pressing their lips together.  It was soft and sweet that left them both smiling as they pulled away.

 

“Don’t take too long, gotta ice your legs so they won’t cramp more than they already are,” Benny said giving his boyfriend a pointed look, “Dean and Cas had to run to the store so dinner won’t be finished until after I take care of ya.”

 

Samandriel felt a deep throb in the tips of his toes when he leaned up to return Benny’s kiss, Immediately he shivered at the idea of coming in from the cold only to be wrapped up in ice. The only thing in his way was his doting boyfriend, Benny always insisted on taking care of him which Samandriel playfully fought against but secretly loved. 

 

“Wouldn’t a warm bath be better?” Samandriel begged, widening his blue eyes and giving Benny his best smile. With the corner of his mouth pulling up a little too far it turned into a smirk, “You could join me…” he added, his voice soft and flirtatious.

 

“And how can I say no to that face hm?  But if you’re legs are stiff tomorrow because didn’t do the ice, that’s on you sweet,” Benny chuckled, kissing the tip of Samandriel’s nose.  He turned a bit to cover up the stew and change it down to low to keep it from burning.  Dean was very well versed in everything that Benny cooked so he wasn’t too worried if they were still in the bath when they would come home.

 

“C’mon,” Benny said as he took up Samandriel’s hand and gently pulled him toward their bathroom.  It had taken awhile to find the perfect apartment but man when they did, Benny and Dean snatched it right up.  It was perfectly designed for two couples; with two master bedrooms, two master bathrooms and even a little study that Benny and Dean had turned into a practice room.  

 

Benny loved their bathroom, it was nice and spacious with a tub big enough to fit not only him but his little boyfriend as well.  It was perfect.

 

“Hey grab the heater, it’s gonna be cold in there,” Benny laughed, veering right to enter the bathroom and start running the hot water.

 

Samandriel nodded, quickly rushing for the small space heater they kept for when the weather got really cold or on the rare occasion they had a power outage. Mostly their apartment had been great about keeping out the cold but their bathroom wasn’t as insulated it seemed, constantly being just a few degrees cooler than the rest of the place. 

 

When he made it back, Benny was still filling their spacious tub. Just as his boyfriend started to reach for the vanilla scented bubbles, Samandriel flinched. “Don’t put in any soap until I get my feet bandaged please… really not looking forward to that.”

 

“No problem,” Benny said putting the bottle back down.  He shifted on the edge of the tub and crooked his finger for Samandriel to come closer.  He payed very close attention to how much his boyfriend actually winced a the few times he held his breath as Benny slowly undressed him.  It was the usual areas but for some reason his arms were a bit worse today.

 

“Are you doin lifts or somethin?” Benny asked as he pushed down Samandriel’s underwear. He pressed a soft kiss to his bare hip bone and stood up to start undressing himself.

 

“A few, but the instructor has been on us about slacking when it comes to upper body. She said that a lithe frame was no excuse for weakness, that the exercises we’ve been doing this week would help with control and learning how to use our core for strength on both halves of the body.” 

 

Samandriel felt himself flush, he’d been struggling intentionally, ashamed that someone would discover his past if he’d easily pulled the task off. “uh..I wasn’t going to say anything but she’s actually set up a few umm..poles in the class.”

 

Benny’s eyes widened, his pants falling down his legs naturally as he stared at Samandriel, “Well, pole dancing isn’t necessarily a bad thing...as long as you feel comfortable doin it cher,” Benny said softly.  He got the rest of his clothes off and thrown to the side.  He stepped over the edge of the tub and hissed as he sat down in the stinging hot water.  It would feel amazing on Samandriel’s sore muscles but it was always a bit too much the first few seconds.  Once he got over the initial shock he helped Samandriel settle in but Benny made him sit with his back on the other side so he could start massaging his feet and calves.

 

He moaned at the amazing pressure Benny was using to work the pain out of him. Samandriel could actually feel the muscles in his feet softening, his shoulders and back following as he allowed himself to dip further into the tub. The water was perfect, he’d always loved his baths hotter than most, loved the way it turned his skin pink even as a child. 

 

“Ohhh God, that’s...mmm you’re perrrrfect,” he moaned, Benny’s thick fingers rubbing at the knots beneath the skin. It took him a few minutes to realize he hadn’t commented further on class. He wasn’t really sure what to say, the pole didn’t make him nervous anymore. The first day, Samandriel had been a little terrified that if he stepped up to it, the harsh memories of his past would flood forward in a rush, but there was nothing. 

 

_ Just a pole _ .

 

“It’s okay, I-it doesn’t bother me. If I didn’t have to try so hard to be bad at it, I think it would be easier, but either way she’s right...it’s important to be able to balance your core strength and nothing will help with that like the pole,” he answered, slowly wiggling his aching toes as Benny worked on his feet.

 

Benny smiled as he switched to the other leg.  He loved being able to give Samandriel this comfort, the feeling of being perfectly safe.  They had worked so hard to get to this point Benny would stop at nothing to make sure Samandriel kept feeling this way.  Thankfully, Samandriel only had nightmares the first few weeks they had moved out of Boston.  Castiel though, was still having them.  They were getting better though and Dean had finally talked him into getting some help for it.  It definitely helped that his therapist Pamela was a hard ass and incredibly blunt.

 

There was a slam from the front door and some laughter following soon after.  Benny found himself breathing a bit easier and smiling wide as the voices of his friends floated back to their bathroom.

 

“How’s that feelin?” Benny asked massaging his fingers up the inside of Samandriel’s knee to his thigh.

 

“Mmm, good, really  _ really _ good.” Samandriel whimpered a little as Benny worked a very sensitive spot beneath his toes. He was just grateful they weren’t bleeding anymore. He’d allowed himself to get lazy with his training once he’d moved into the palace and when he started back at his ridiculous training schedule, his callouses split open and he’d had to grow them all over again. Thankfully now he just had the occasional blister and cut instead of every toe feeling sliced open.

 

“Good,” Benny said continuing with each leg until Samandriel was damn near falling asleep.  Benny helped move him so that now his back was to Benny and he was able to start working on the knots in his shoulders and arms.  

 

“Don’t fall asleep on me cher,” Benny chuckled as his boyfriend practically became useless.  There was a soft giggle that he just barely heard and Benny just shook his head fondly.  He scooped Samandriel up and cradled him to his chest as they continued to soak in the tub, the heat still simmering and Benny sighed contentedly.  

 

“I make no promises,” Samandriel replied sleepily, wrapping his arms around Benny’s thick middle. The bath was amazing but what truly made him relax was knowing they were warm and safe and that Benny was there in his arms. He could go the rest of his life with just that and never have to worry about anything. As long as they were together, Samandriel knew his happiness would stay. 

 

“Mmm. Love you,” he mumbled, his fingers scratching gently against the exposed flesh of Benny’s chest. 

 

“Love you too sweetheart,” Benny sighed, sinking them a bit further down into the water as his boyfriend cuddled closer.

* * *

 

Castiel ran inside the apartment laughing, Dean close on his heels as they raced into the kitchen, “I told you I can run up the stairs faster than you,” he said a bit breathlessly.  Their friends were nowhere to be seen but when he noticed the stew on the stove he knew instantly that Benny had Samandriel in the bath.  It was a routine that even he and Dean shared.  

“You’d think after a day like you and Samandriel have you’d be at least a little worn out,” Dean puffed, grabbing at air like it was a gift from the gods. His husband was friggin’ ridiculous. Balancing himself against the counter, Dean tried to catch his breath. 

“H-how do you do it. I mean...” Dean huffed, drawing in air until his lungs felt full of it and then slowly exhaling, ignoring the thumping pulse in his ears. “I’m in good shape but...uhh you’re like a freakin’ machine.”

Castiel laughed softly and grabbed up the bags from Dean’s hands to place them on the counter before they dropped, “Oh don’t worry, I’ll probably crash the second I sit down but you’ve gotten lazy,” Castiel teased poke at Dean’s slightly fluffier stomach.  It wasn’t his fault of course, they’d all settled into this quiet little life of theirs and were flourishing from it.  

Dean was always gorgeous to Castiel, it didn’t matter what he looked like or if he’d gained a few extra pounds.  He would never take for granted that smile or those impossible green eyes.  And if he had to be truly honest with himself, the extra little pooch was hot.  

“Lazy my ass…” Dean answered, reaching out to grab at Cas’ hand and spinning them until he was pressed up tightly against the countertop. In one smooth motion Dean had his husband’s legs wrapped around his hips and a tight grip on the perfectly rounded curve of his ass. “I’ll show you lazy.”

Dipping forward Dean tugged at Castiel’s lower lip, sucking it between his teeth with a small bite. He deepened the kiss, practically growling when he swallowed Castiel’s small moan, rolling his hips until they both felt the friction from it. A wide smirk forming on Dean’s face when his husband began to whimper softly into his mouth. “Now wouldn’t it just be terrible if I got lazy and couldn’t find the energy to keep this going?”

“Now that mister is not being lazy, that’s you being a jerk,” Castiel laughed, wrapping his arms tightly around Dean’s neck and nipping at his bottom lip.  He tried to lift his leg higher up Dean’s waist and groaned for a whole other reason.  Running up the stairs had not been a smart thing to do at all.

“Yeah, maybe.. I’ll give you that one. C’mon gimpy, let’s get you in the tub.” Dean laughed as he hauled Cas up off the counter and carried him bridal style toward their bathroom. He saw the twinge of pain in his husband’s eyes and he wouldn’t put Cas through any more of that than necessary. 

Dean sat him down on the edge of the tub as he started the faucet, happy to see that the investment of a second water heater was well planned. There was no way that they’d be able to fill both of the large tubs around the same time nearly every day without it. Tugging at the hem of Castiel’s shirt, Dean motioned for him to lift his arms up. With a wicked smile he laughed,  “Okay, now to get you out of these clothes.” 

“Ugh, you’re so mean,” Castiel teased, playfully tugging on Dean’s belt.  The second Dean’s shirt was lifted up Castiel leaned forward and kissed at that soft belly, nibbling all around his belly button as his hands began to work Dean’s pants off.

Dean lifted his hips to help Cas finish undressing him, though he never understood why his belly was such a draw for the guy. Dean had been self conscious at first, always taking control and choosing positions that would look more flattering or hide away his extra weight, but Cas wasn’t having it. His fingers always scooting across the skin with a fascination that even Dean couldn’t say no to. “Hey, you knew I was a dick when you married me.. No take-backs.” 

Castiel laughed softly and leaned back a bit to brush his fingers against the water.  It was extremely hot and he couldn’t wait to get in.

“Yeah I knew and I wouldn’t have you any other baby,” Castiel said sitting back up and dragging his hands up the sides of Dean’s bow legged thighs.  He got his fingers under Dean’s underwear and yanked them down as well before nipping at his hip.     
  


“Help me up, I don’t think I’m gonna be able to stand on my own now,” Castiel laughed.

“As you wish,” Dean teased, quoting Castiel’s favorite movie. Lifting his husband, both Dean and Cas worked to get all three layers over his hips. His underwear, the thin pants he used for practice and the thicker outer layer that were practically sweats. Dean gently sat him back down on the porcelain rim as he tugged the wadded fabric over Castiel’s aching feet.

Issuing a quick warning, Dean continued.“Gotta go for the socks now, sweetheart.” 

Castiel sucked in a quick breath and winced as the thick socks were eased off his feet.  He didn’t nearly suffer the same pain as Samandriel but it felt like he walked on nothing but pointed rocks with no shoes on.  Thankfully, the both of them had a wonderful doting boyfriend/husband willing to help work out all the pains and aches.  

“I love dancing and I would never be the same without it but damn...these teachers are working us to the bone,” Castiel whined as he tried to curl his toes.

“Oh please, we both know that none of your instructors aren’t nearly as hard on you as you are on yourself,” Dean answered, slowly stretching Castiel’s leg out to it’s full extent. He felt the muscles quiver beneath his hands and he shook his head. His husband was pushing himself so hard, never wanting to be a step behind any of the other students and Dean wondered far too often how far Cas was willing to go to prove himself and who exactly he wanted to be there to witness it. 

Castiel blushed as Dean continued to stretch out his legs just enough for him to crawl into the tub without face planting the plastic.  They hardly talked about it, mostly because Castiel was determined to forget it all and work on getting his life back.  But when he saw all those other dancers who were much younger than himself it never failed to come creeping back up just how many years were taken from him.  

His therapist was trying to get him to talk about it more, to tell Dean when he was having those thoughts or memories like right now.  Half the time he wasn’t even aware that he was closing in on himself.  

“Hey, hey...what’s going on in that pretty head of yours?” Dean asked, sliding into the tub behind his husband. Normally he would have sat on the edge, squeezing at the aching muscles but Dean could practically feel Cas shying away and he wasn’t having it. He wrapped his arms around Castiel’s waist and tucked his chin over a shoulder. “I know it’s not easy but you’ve gotta cut yourself a little slack, sweetheart. You’re an amazing dancer and I know that I’m not an expert or anything but Samandriel can spot mistakes and stuff that I don’t see, and he’s said repeatedly that you’re one of the best he’s ever seen.”

“I-I don’t know, I guess I’m just trying to make up for lost time,” Castiel said softly, moving around so he could hide his face in Dean’s neck.  His body was aching and begging for some kind of attention but he opted to just snuggle in closer until he let out a shaky breath.  

“Cas, as much as I hate that those years were stolen from you, no matter how hard you push yourself or how far you get, nothing is ever going to give that back to you.” Dean rubbed a hand down the long line of Castiel’s side, settling low on his hip. He hated to see his husband so upset, but he’d been through hell and back and there were so many scars, some that even Dean couldn’t see. “It’s your passion and I know how happy it makes you, but if you do this for much longer you’re going to push too far and it might not anymore. I’m honestly worried that part of you has already learned to associate dancing with pain and vice versa. Pushing yourself is okay, but killing yourself to get back something you’ve lost forever will only take more and more of your time away.”

Castiel nodded as a few tears spilled over, his body trembling a bit.  Dean scooted them further under the water and Castiel sighed at the heat hugging around him.

“There are times when I can’t shut that part off...that if I keep pushing through it I’ll make it to the other side breathing.  Pamela, she um, suggested that you come to a few classes so that if it does happen I can look at you and remember that I’m not there in that club anymore.  But I haven’t asked because of your work and physical therapy…” Castiel sighed heavily and rubbed at his eyes.  

“When..when did she tell you this?” Dean asked, a small fire burning in his gut. How could Cas have kept this from him. Surely he knew that Dean would be willing to do whatever it took to keep him from going back to that goddamn club even if it was only in his mind. He was almost shaking with anger, though he wasn’t even sure he blamed Cas. The guy had enough on his plate to worry about but if he could bring himself to care half as much for himself as he did for everyone around him, he’d have fucking asked. 

Castiel could practically feel the anger burning off of Dean and he scrambled to the other side of the tub, not even realizing that he was fleeing from the very man who vowed to protect him.

“Please…” he whispered.  He wasn’t even seeing Dean at that point, it was just a blur of faces that had him feeling sick to his stomach and trembling.

“Cas?” The anger flew right out of him as he watched his husband pull away with a terrified expression on his face. Dean was rarely ever angry with Cas over anything so he honestly didn’t know if this was a normal reaction or if it was something. “Hey, sweetheart...Come back to me, Cas look, I promise, I won’t be mad anymore...I just worry about you and I want you to take care of yourself.”

The faces finally drifted away one by one and Castiel blinked hard a few times before he was looking into Dean’s concerned face, “I-I’m sorry,” he swallowed against the huge lump in his throat and tentatively reached for Dean’s hand.  It took a bit of coaxing from Dean but eventually he was back to leaning against Dean and he was exhausted.  He didn’t remember Dean’s question until his husband began to start massaging into Castiel’s knotted up shoulders.

“Um, she asked last week…” he said just barely above a whisper.

“Cas, you should have said something… I’d have went to class with you. I will go to class with you, whenever you want. I don’t want you going back to that place anymore…” Dean cut himself off, doing his best to reign in his emotion. He wasn’t angry anymore but he was hurt and disappointed and it could very easily make the situation worse if he didn’t get a handle on it. Instead he fought it all back and put on a smile, “Besides, why would you deprive me of a free show, you know I love to watch you dance...even with your clothes on.”

“Dean…” Castiel huffed out a laugh and pinched at Dean’s leg.  He felt incredibly raw at the moment but he had to remember that he wasn’t alone anymore.  Dean was there and wanted to help.  Castiel had to cling to that no matter what else happened.  

Even though his muscles were protesting every move, he managed to straddle Dean’s thighs and hug around his husband’s body tightly.

“I love you so much Dean,” he mumbled against Dean’s ear.

‘I love you too, sweetheart… that’s why I need you to take care of yourself and maybe worry about me a little less.” Dean’s hands raised to grip at Cas’ hips, the water swishing higher over their naked thighs. He loved that his husband was selfless, caring, and considerate, but after everything they’d both been forced to live through, Dean needed Castiel’s help to pull them both out of the  _ not quite hell _ they’d been in. Mostly healed but not quite right, they were both still struggling with what those four years had meant for them but Dean knew that if they tried, they could get through it together. 

“I’ll try, I promise,” Castiel said pushing closer until their bodies were flush together.  It didn’t matter if they were touching from head to toe or Dean was as close to him as a human being could possibly get it still didn’t feel like enough.

“Can we get out now so you can just lay on top of me,” Castiel laughed.

“As you wish,” Dean answered. He waited for Cas to pull himself up on the edge of the tub before he moved to get out. He reached for the top towel in the cupboard and quickly swiped at his hair and skin before reaching for Castiel’s plushy soft robe that seemed to drown him when draped over his shoulders. He used the robe to pull some of the water away from Castiel’s skin before carrying him toward their bed. 

The moment Castiel was on the mattress he became a starfish and stretched out his limbs until he felt that amazing deep stretch even within his core.  Dean stood at the edge of the bed staring at him with a small fond smile and Castiel reached for him with grabby hands.  They got the robe off Castiel’s shoulders and finally Dean was lying on top of him.  It wasn’t even sexual, just Dean’s heavy weight settling right on him.  For whatever reason it calmed his raw nerves and he was able to take in a deep breath.

“Can we just stay like this for the rest of the night?” Castiel asked, hugging Dean’s waist with his knees and began to draw little swirls up his back and arms.

“If that’s what you want, but I think you might feel differently after a little nap.” Dean slowly eased up to lean a little of his weight onto his elbow, though still heavy and firm on top of his husband. It gave them both a better angle to see one another and if there was one thing Dean couldn’t deprive himself of, it was the beautiful sight of Castiel’s face. “We could stay like this forever if you wanted, I’m sure Benny would make sure we didn’t starve to death…”

Castiel laughed, dragging his nails over Dean’s shoulders and then down his chest, “I doubt he’d bring it into the room though, he’s seen enough of me for a lifetime,” Castiel said, leaning up to nip at the edges of Dean’s chin and jaw.

“Oh trust me, he wouldn’t have a chance… I plan on keeping you for myself.” Dean answered, a low growl rumbling in his chest. Cas knew exactly how to bring out his jealousy but thankfully never took it too far. It was mostly a teasing comment when they were all alone, never in front of others where Dean would have actually felt bad. This way was much easier, he buried his nose into the curve of Castiel’s neck and nuzzled until he forced his husband to open the sensitive place so that Dean could sink his teeth into the small piece of flesh between his neck and shoulder. Sucking and pulling at the soon to be bruised skin, Dean left his mark. 

Humming with satisfaction, Dean grinned up at his husband, “Mmm, mine.”

Castiel couldn’t help the mewl that left his mouth or the way his body writhed underneath Dean.  He loved how territorial Dean had become and constantly marked him up. 

“Always,” Castiel moaned pulling Dean down to kiss hungrily at his lips.  His hands slid back up Dean’s chest and snaked his arms around Dean’s neck to bring them flush together.  Castiel’s body was craving every little touch and ounce of heat Dean could give and it still didn’t seem enough.

“I need you,” he whined softly into Dean’s ear.

“I’m here, sweetheart. Always here for you.” Dean answered, spreading Castiel’s legs to wrap around his waist as he pushed forward, leaning in for a deeper kiss. It was familiar and practiced but still brought new and raw shocks of excitement through him. He would do whatever it took to make sure Cas pushed through all of the shit he’d been put through and come out okay on the other side of it. They were going to get their happily ever after, it wouldn’t be perfect but it would be theirs. 

 

* * *

 

Castiel woke up with a soft moan, the sound of someone shouting echoing through their apartment.  It was softened by someone murmuring who he was assuming was Samandriel.  Castiel couldn't help laughing, they had completely forgotten about the stew on the stove and now it was probably ruined.

He rolled over onto his back with a sigh, Dean’s arm sliding around him and pulling him in tight.  Castiel felt so calm now and incredibly stated that the last hour before they got in bed was nothing but a distorted dream.

Sleep was pulling him back in when he caught a little movement at the window.  As gently as he could he moved Dean’s arm enough to tiptoe toward it and pull up the blinds.

“Oh my God,” Castiel smiled bright and pushed up the window to take in a deep breath.  It was snowing outside and the cold air felt amazing against his face.  He closed it back up and jumped up on their bed to prod his husband awake.

“Dean...baby...wake up!” Castiel giggled poking him in the side and his stomach.

“C’mon sweetheart, five more minutes.” Dean tried to say, the words came out ridiculously muted and distorted but he thought he got his point across. He turned over, grumpily pushing away the pointed jabs from his husband. He was in the middle of a wonderful dream and he didn’t want to be woken up quite yet. 

_ That was when the shaking started… _

Dean grunted, wiping the sleep from his eyes as he blinked them open. Cas was leering over him with a wide grin and one of the happiest looks Dean had ever seen on him. “Wha’ssit?”

“It’s snowing!  Come on, get your lazy ass out of bed!” Castiel laughed and darted off the bed before Dean could retaliate.  He tugged on some thick pants and one of his favorite hoodies that he shared with Dean.

“Benny!  Samandriel!  It’s snowing!” Castiel shouted once he had their door open.  He found the couple kissing against the counter but quickly pulled away when they heard Castiel.

Samandriel giggled happily as he rushed over to the window to see the white blanket falling from the sky. His eyes went wide as the flakes were rapidly pulled to the ground. Following Castiel’s lead, Samandriel rushed off toward the bedroom to look for something warm and comfortable. When he noticed he was alone, he slipped back out to the kitchen and grabbed at his boyfriend’s hand. “Benny, C’mon!” 

Dean grumbled at the shouts echoing through their apartment but forced himself to sit up. He was already half awake and he knew that Cas wasn’t going to give it up. The guy loved winter and it was the first snow of the year, no way was he going to be able to go back to sleep. Yawning, he reached into the drawer for some clothes and mostly kept himself upright while his still sleepy limbs fumbled them on.

Benny chuckled as he watched both Samandriel and Castiel practically lose their shit over some snow.  He got dressed and made sure both of them were just warm enough to go outside.  On his way out he stopped at Dean’s room and snickered at the man who was moving slower than molasses.

“C’mon brother,” Benny grinned, yanking his best friend out of the room and then outside.  Their boyfriends were on the side of the apartment already launching snowballs at each other while giggling like children.

“Ain’t that a sight for sore eyes,” Benny said softly, giving his best friend a squeeze on the shoulder before running forward and tackling Samandriel into a pile of snow.

“Dean! Come on!” Castiel called out, a huge dippy smile on his face.

The beautiful grin on Cas’ face did help to pull him outside, though Dean wasn’t particularly fond of being cold, especially not when he had the option of being warm. As soon as Samandriel was distracted by Benny, Dean found his husband looking at him with a snowball in hand and wicked grin on his face. “Cas...sweetheart...don’t you dare.”

Castiel just grinned wider and launched the snowball at Dean’s face, only getting a second to laugh before Dean was tackling him down right next to Samandriel and Benny.  Once Dean got his revenge by dumping a bunch of snow on Castiel’s face he pulled Dean down and kissed his cold lips.

“I love you,” Castiel giggled and for the first time truly feeling free.


End file.
